Ash vs Evil Dead

Shh. Baal doesn't use brute force.

He breeds paranoia, gets into people's psyches,

turning them against each other.

The Necronomicon is the only way

we can banish Baal back to the underworld.

The book, it did something to me.

It changed me.

You're becoming one with the book.

Just you and me now Chet.

Cheryl, this only feels half as good as it used to.

Chet!

And that, Elk Grove,

is how you take care of business.

Ash! Behind you!

Shh.

Wouldn't it be much easier,

to work together?

Oh.

Ow.

Where am I?

You had the nightmare again.

Where'd you come from?

Who are you?

You don't know who I am today?

Never saw your mug before in my life.

Hm. Memory loss.

It's not a positive development.

I'm Doctor Peacock. Your psychiatrist, remember?

My shrink?

Ah, well, boy, the joke's on you there Doc,

because I don't have a shrink.

I don't even have health care,

in fact, I do my own surgery.

That's for your own safety.

You've been becoming increasingly violent of late.

Ash, I've been your doctor ever since your psychotic break.

My what? My psychotic break?

Yes, Ash.

You murdered four people in a cabin.

Oh, Christ!

Here we go, with that horseshit again.

Uh...

you know what?

That wasn't me, Doc.

That was some evil BS.

After the murders, you created a complex delusion

to justify your actions.

It all hinged on an evil "Book."

Ever since then, I've been trying to help you

pinpoint that delusion, and destroy it.

Okay, so you want to...

destroy my delusion?

That's right.

Rid yourself of the Book,

and the nightmare will be over.

Okay.

You know Doc, I think I'm starting to get it.

Good.

I know who you are.

You are that demon Bill.

Oh, sorry, Baal!

You know that that book can send you back, right?

So you want to scramble my brain until I give it to you.

Well think again!

The only person who scrambles my brain, pal,

is me, by doing the fun stuff,

like drinking glue, and sniffing booze!

Ash, I can't breathe!

They said that you were crafty.

You led me right to you.

Now I'm going to kill you, just like I killed your father!

I didn't really kill your father,

that just kind of sounded cool.

The point is, you're dead!

Ash, it's me. Your doctor.

You know, Ruby said this would be hard.

Buddy, I've had harder turds.

You are a joke of a demon!

We will break you of these delusions, Ash.

I'm not giving up on you.

Yeah?

Well you,

can suck my saggy bills...

Baal.

No. No! No!

What did you do to me?

You're the hardest patient I've ever treated, Ash.

Most people, after a brief discussion,

see things my way.

Not you, though. You're special.

Yeah, I'll show you special.

I'll shove you on that short bus straight back to hell, buddy.

You have to understand that my reality is reality, Ashley.

Does the patient need--

The patient needs to get out of this dump,

and tell his friends that he found the demon!

We're fine in here, Nurse. We're making progress.

Oh no, we're not, we're--

Ruby? Ruby!

He's right here, we can finish this!

I'll come back later.

No, no, no! Don't go!

Tell Pablo-- !

And Kelly?

You better not hurt them.

How could I hurt them? They're all in your head.

You invented this entire narrative.

The team, the Book,

so that you wouldn't have to face the truth.

You murdered your friends in cold blood.

Says you, Captain Creepy.

I think it's time that we tried a new tactic.

Seeing as you're unable to face reality by yourself,

I've brought in a friend who might be able to help.

Meet Ashy Slashy.

A puppet. I hate puppets!

Even stunningly handsome ones.

Get that out of here!

See, it's easy.

Okay, this is not me.

I'm not doing this.

Right.

Just like you didn't kill your friends.

Hey, pal, what's the scoop? Hm?

Ah come on, you can talk to me, Ash.

I'm all ears.

This is dumb.

You're dumb. You're dumb!

You're old! You're short!

How is this happening?

Whose side are you even on?

I'm on our side, Ash.

I'm you, but the part of "you"

who's willing to face reality.

Who believes the doctor.

Who wants to face the delusions.

Let's rid ourselves of the Necronomicon, Ash.

We don't need it anymore.

Ruby, get back in here, and help me.

Tell them I'm not crazy!

There is no Ruby.

No Kelly. No Pablo.

You made it all up!

No. No!

They're real!

Ah!

Give in.

Let the doctor help us.

Get your filthy puppet butthole off of my arm!

: Let me out.

Hey! Mommy!

Ow!

Ash.

Ash.

Oh, God! Somebody light a candle.

Smells like death in here.

What are you doing in my room?

Oh. Oh, nothing.

Don't worry about it.

I'm just- I'm just in your imagination.

Are you a ghost?

Kelly?

Oh, you're here to help me!

Sweet!

Ooh, you don't smell so sweet,

but you know, that's nothing 10 or 12

showers can't fix.

I know who you are.

Murderer. Murderer!

Shh! Shh! Murderer!

Inside voice.

Right. Let me ask you a question.

How long have I been here?

You've been here forever.

Oh, no.

No. That's not possible.

At least I don't think it's possible.

Well, how would you know anyway?

Because I'm very good at keeping count.

It's what I do.

See.

I've been here for six years,

three months, and five days.

Let me show you how I count.

What's that?

One! Ooh, no!

That's so not necessary!

Oh, Kelly! Two!

Stop doing that.

Three!

You're going to run out of fingers.

Somebody get me out of here!

Pablo! Oh, thank God you're here!

You got to get me out of here.

Baal put the whammy on Kelly.

Now she's crazy as a mad cow.

Shut your trap, Slashy!

On the ground, hands behind your back, now!

What? Why?

You know the drill.