South Park

I'm goin' down to South Park.

Gonna have myself a time.

Friendly faces everywhere.

Humble folks without temptation

I'm goin' down to South Park, gonna leave my woes behind.

Ample parking day or night.

People spouting... Howdy, neighbor.

Headin' on up to South Park, gonna see if I can't unwind.

Come on down to South Park, and meet some friends of mine.

I want you all to take a close look

at your math exams, children.

Some of you did very well, but many of you did not.

Aw, man!

The addition of fractions is very simple.

Let's run through it again.

How do we solve this first one?

Add together the 3 and the 3!

Good, Butters. We add the 3's together.

And what about the 4's? Token?

They're the denominators, so they stay a 4.

Wait, wait! Token got an A?

But I cheated off of Token!

I can't hear you, Eric.

I said something's wrong!

I got an F, but I cheated off Token!

Active shooter! Active shooter!

All units, report in.

And now we divide, right?

Craig, how about you? What are we dividing?

Divide 4 by 6?

The 4 by 6...

Unit five in southwest classroom!

Or the 6 by the 4?

The 6 by the 4.

Southwest classroom clear!

Copy. Southwest classroom clear.

Now, we're gonna re-take the exam on Friday.

Shooter's in the hallway! All units, report!

Now, I'm giving you an opportunity to do better.

I hope you take advantage of it.

- Put down the gun, son. - You can see where Token erased his answers

- and wrote in the right ones! - You don't want to do this!

He did it to me on purpose!

Eric, that's enough.

Shooter is down. Shooter is down.

Now, let's move on to the next equation.

That is such bullshit, you guys!

Token knew I was cheating off of him,

so he deliberately put down the wrong answers!

Why would he do that?

I flunked that test too.

I don't understand fractions. They don't make any sense.

That's not the point, you guys.

Why is Token out to get me?

There's something going on here.

Another school shooting today

has left students in shock and disbelief.

Yeah, Token's probably sick of you

cheating off of him all the time.

But why now? That's the question, Kyle.

I always cheat off Token.

Why did he choose now to hurt me?

Stanley!

Stanley, oh, my God!

Baby! Oh, you're okay!

Hey, Mom.

It's all right, Stanley.

We're gonna go home and talk about this with your dad.

And we will get through this as a family.

Come on. Get in the car.

Dude, what's up Stan's mom's ass?

Stanley... Well?

Do you want to tell your father

about what happened at school today?

I flunked my math quiz.

No! The other thing!

What other thing?

What happened at school today?

Oh, the school shooting?

Yes! The school shooting!

Oh, yeah. Some kid shot up the school.

Who shot up the schoo... Was it you?

No.

Did you get shot?

No.

Well, what's this about failing a math quiz?

Are you serious?!

Did you not hear what your child said?!

Kids died at his school!

I'm sorry, Sharon. I...

Why are you all acting like this is normal?

What is wrong with you people?

What's up mom's ass?

Hey, Sharon. You doing okay?

No, I'm not okay!

Children were shot!

They were killed at a school

where they were supposed to be safe!

And what else is going on?

Why does there need to be anything else?!

- Are you kidding me?! - I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Sharon.

Why isn't anyone else emotional?!

Hon...

when was your last...

I mean, you know how sometimes

things can seem like a little bigger deal

'cause, you know, your down there?

Don't you dare suggest that I'm only emotional

- because it's... - I'm... I'm just... I'm just

pointing out that it is around that time.

Get out, Randy! I'm not overreacting!

Okay. Okay. Love you, honey. I'll leave you alone.

Whelp, another three days of this probably.

I understand that there have been

some problems here at the school lately.

A lot of students are experiencing anxiety,

and Eric Cartman just wanted to be able to voice his concerns.

Go ahead, Eric.

Token.

There are some terrible things that I realize

you might have heard from the other kids here at school.

There are some rumors that have been going around about me

that... that I thought.

Black Panther was a terrible movie.

There's rumors that I said it was a structural mess,

you know, that the rhinos were really stupid.

I want to assure you

that I never said anything like that.

I loved Black Panther.

So if, you know, you feel like there's a need to come after me

to get back at me,

I just need you to know that people are lying

because I liked Black Panther just as much as you did.

I am not a racist.

I actually never saw Black Panther.

Say what, girlfriend?!

Whatchu talkin' 'bout, Willis?!

Come on, Rog! You never saw Black Panther?

No, I didn't see it.

But I thought all of you saw it.

I got this one.

All right, everyone, get down!

Everybody, get the fuck down!

Token, let's be honest with each other, okay?

Why else would you manipulate my test grades?

How exactly did Token manipulate your grades, Eric?

There was a test.

I should have got an A on it,

but Token did things to make me fail, and it's not fair.

M'kay! M'kay! Who's shootin' up the school?

Is that true, Token?

Did you do something to make Eric fail a test?

I didn't make him fail, no.

You didn't make me fail the test,

and you didn't see Black Panther, right.

I mean... I mean, this is ridiculous.

Over this way! Into the cafeteria!

Right over there, m'kay? No, you shot the wrong one!

Thanks for coming, everybody.

I'm sure you all heard

there was yet another school shooting today.

We have to figure out what we're going to do as parents

because this whole thing is out of control.

We have to ask ourselves

why this is happening and do something now!

Well, you know, Sharon,

I think it is a complex issue, you know.

It's... It's not really as simple as just...

What I'm saying is that... that with issues like this,

sometimes you have to be kind of... crazy?

What are you talking about?!

Do you understand that our children are being murdered?

Red?

How much closer to home can this all hit?

It was at our children's school!

Crazy time. Crazy red time.

I agree with my wife.

Well, there certainly are things that need changing.

Just yesterday, I was at the park with my son Craig,

and have you seen the state of the playground equipment?

Not only does it seem unsafe,

but it's become quite an eyesore.

The whole park could use an upgrade, if you ask me.

It's become a camp-out for the homeless.

Are you fucking joking?!

You're gonna take one second

to compare child murder to park upgrades?!

What is wrong with everybody?!

You've all gone crazy!

Anybody need a drink?

Butters.

Oh, hey, Eric!

Butters, I need help.

My mom said if I flunk another math test,

she's gonna ground me from playing Fortnite.

Oh, geez. You want me to help you study?

No, dumb-ass.

I need to get some dirt on Token

so he stops punishing me

for what I supposedly said about Black Panther.