Smallville

Subs by KalEl82

This is what I love about high-school parties. People will gather anywhere

as long as there's alcohol and the chance of hooking up.

If I recall, you're the one who wanted to come to this party.

I didn't know it was gonna be so cold. It's like 20,000 degrees below zero.

-It doesn't feel that cold to me. -What, are you from an ice planet?

I'm gonna go thaw out by the fire.

Have fun.

Hey, Kent.

You're friends with Chloe. Is she flying solo tonight?

Believe me, Sean, you're not her type.

Well, you'd be surprised.

If you want, I could rub them for you.

Well, nothing heats up a body like friction.

Wow. I can't believe you just delivered that line with a straight face.

All I did was offer to keep your hands warm, Chloe.

-And he knows my name. -I've read your editorials in the Torch.

-Pretty cool. -Well, thank you, Sean.

I sit next to Jenna in bio class. Remember, you dumped her last week?

-It was mutual. -So you're here trolling for fresh meat.

Don't worry, Chloe. I'm not gonna make a move on you.

No matter how pretty I think you are.

Sean, Hail Marys down by the lake.

Yeah.

-Hey, can I get your number? -Why? You're never going to call.

-I'll call you tomorrow. I promise. -Well, I won't hold my breath.

- Come on, Sean, let's go. - Hey, Whitney, back pass.

Did you just write your phone number down on Sean Kelvin's hand?

Don't sound so shocked, Clark.

Guys find me attractive even if I don't have raven hair and the initials "L.L."

That's not what I meant.

-The guy's a dog. -Clark, relax.

I just gave him my number to get rid of him. Get Pete. The taxi's leaving.

- What's with you and Chloe Sullivan? - What do you mean?

-The girl from the Torch. You into her? -Another notch, dog.

That's cold.

Hey, hold on, pizza's here.

-Sorry, dude. -Go ahead. I'll get the ball.

Whoa.

Hey, where's Sean?

I don't know. Probably in the back of some car.

The distributor gets 12.5.

Feed bill over six months at 5%.

Plus the mortgage at 8.2.

-Plus the harvester repairs gives us-- -Fifty-four thousand

five hundred and one dollars and thirty-eight cents.

Hey, son. Look, I'm sorry. We didn't mean for you to hear all that.

You don't have to protect me. Is it that bad?

It's pretty bad. We might have to take out a loan.

-Another one? The interest would put-- -Clark, don't.

-Maybe I can help. -You have.

-Last season you saved us four hands. -I'm thinking bigger picture.

Forget about this high-school thing and try out for a pro sports team.

I could make a ton of money in endorsements.

Just trying to lighten the mood.

Much as we'd love to see your face on a cereal box,

we'd settle for you getting to school on time.

Forgot.

-That's 65,200-- -Go.

And one.

-So did Sean call? -Negative.

Not that I was waiting by the phone or anything.

Maybe he got caught up. One time my sister didn't hear from a guy for a week.

Turned out his grandmother died.

As much as I appreciate the spotlight here, I'm fine.

You're probably better off. Sean's a total dog anyway.

He's not that bad, Clark. He's always been cool to me.

Just because you can't get past your Lana crush, don't knock us for trying to make a love connection.

I thought we were focusing on me.

-I don't have a crush on her. -Ask another girl out.

-Like who? -Chloe.

Wait. I'm not a dummy you can use to try out your dating skills.

You, if you like Lana so much,

why don't you just ask her out?

And, you, stop acting like a Vegas bookie picks your dates.

And, both of you, treat me better.

This is the flu season, young man. I don't know why you came in today.

I felt fine this morning, and now I can't get warm.

Let's see.

This can't be right. You're not a Popsicle.

Let's try again.

Here we go.

Now you're giving me the chills. I'm sending you home.

Uh-uh.

I'm all right. I'm actually feeling a little better now. Thanks.

Whoa!

I come in peace.

-I'm so sorry. I didn't hear you. -I'm just glad you weren't welding.

-What brings you out here? -Those artichokes of yours.

-I need about 30 if you've got them. -Thirty. That's a lot.

I'm hosting a dinner tomorrow for the local farming community.

Just a talk about some financial options. A lot of farms are having money trouble.

-People aren't looking for more loans. -I'm offering my role as an investor.

Help people modernize and expand.

This town once grew 20% of the corn in the state.

Smallville was a heavy hitter. It just lost the drive to stay competitive.

Or its connections.

If this town ever had connections, they wouldn't have named it Smallville.

Your husband hasn't kept his feelings about me a secret.

I'd appreciate hearing your thoughts, even if you're not interested.

Jonathan doesn't hate you. Your family's track record hasn't been the best.

Tell him I intend to change that.

That's a great exhibit. Caught it in St. Petersburg.

Whitney and I are going to Metropolis. I thought we'd check it out.

Ah. Trying to give the quarterback some culture?

It was his idea.

He figures one afternoon at the museum, he's off the hook for six months.

For someone who wants people to keep an open mind, you're quick to judge.

Hey, Whitney.

What can I say? I just think you're with the wrong guy.

Hey.

Everything okay?

Yeah, I was just checking out some stuff for us to do tomorrow.

Metropolis, remember?

Some of the guys are pulling together and getting the fight on pay-per-view.

It's tomorrow.

And you gave them your money already.

Yeah.

Hey, we'll go next weekend, okay? I promise.

-I'm really sorry, Lana. -Culture can wait.

I'll make it up to you.

See you.

You know, she's free tomorrow night. Hey, Clark.

This is the perfect time for you to ask her out.

She's got a boyfriend, Lex.

A high-school boyfriend isn't a husband, he's an obstacle.

I bet if you ask Lana to go with you to the Radiohead concert, she'll say yes.

-And if she says yes? -I'll give you the tickets.

Why are you doing this?

You're like the younger brother I never had.

-Someone should benefit from my experience. -I can't just ask her out.

The hardest thing is telling the girl you love that you like her.

I'll raise the bet. You ask her in the next 60 seconds,

you get the tickets and I'll throw in a roundtrip limo ride. Starting now.

-Hey, Lana, you busy? -Completely swamped.

That's why I'm sitting in a coffee shop trying to wade through a Russian classic.

That was a joke, Clark.

Uh, good. Because there's this thing tomorrow night.

Define "thing."

It's a concert. Radiohead, to be exact, and I've got a couple of tickets.

Wow. Where'd you get these?

A friend. Something came up at the last minute

and I was wondering if you'd like to go, you know, with me.

-I'd-- -Just as friends.

Definitely. I'd love to.

Let me get this straight. You walked in to get a cappuccino

and walked out with a date with Lana Lang.

It's not actually a date.

Even with the "just as friends" rider, I'm impressed.

How did you score the tickets?

I'm guessing a certain follically-challenged individual was behind it.

Lex hooked me up. Actually, Chloe, I have you to thank.

-What did I do? -You were right. I just had to get it out.

Well, good. I'm glad.

Maybe this is your chance.

Chloe, don't I owe you a phone call?

-I guess so. -What are you doing right now?

Well, I've got to put the paper to bed.

Maybe afterwards we could do something.

Jenna, Jenna, wait up.

Okay, I was playing barely hard to get. What's the problem?

Clark Kent gets a date with Lana Lang

and suddenly there's no luck left for the rest of us.

Sean, is that you?

I've been waiting for you.

Thought you might like to take a shower.

Sean?

Well, what are you waiting for?

The water's nice and warm.

Sean?

Sean, what happened to you?

I'm sorry, but I don't know what's wrong with me.

Sean, you're really scaring me. What do you want?

I just want to get warm.

It's bad enough you ride that motorcycle, but do you have to repair it in the house?

If I didn't, you'd never have a reason to be angry with me.

I'll trade you. Do all the engine work you want, but come with me to Lex's.

-We've already talked about that. -I talked, you grunted.

I thought that I was rather articulate.

Sweetheart, the Luthors have sold out anyone who's ever trusted them.

They don't keep their word.

"They" is Lex's father, not him.

Be honest, you've never seen him be anything but generous.

Arrogant and a little strange, yes, but he's been a good friend to Clark.

-We have to at least hear him out. -Why?

We need options, Jonathan. Our home is on the line. Our farm.

You don't have to like him to listen. Besides, um...

I already told him we would come.

-Hello, citizens. -I'm not familiar with this child.

-Where's the moody one, lives upstairs? -He's going on a date tonight.

-Not a "date" date, but to a concert. -Who's this "not a 'date' date" with?

Lana Lang.

Lex hooked me up with tickets and his limo.

-He did? -It's okay if I go, right?

Well, I guess Lex Luthor has worked out all of our evenings for us.