A One Sided Affair

- This door doesn't work, we just go through here.

Okay.

- Come on. - Thank you.

- Oh my. - Yep.

- Oh, goodness. - Got it?

Oh goodness, it's ridiculous.

Well, that has to get fixed.

- Oh, I don't know, makes for kind of a nice view.

- I can't believe you live with it like that.

Why don't he fix it?

It helps to keep out the riffraff.

Riffraff?

- You know, those people who come to dinner,

one of them's allergic to gluten, the other to garlic,

one's a vegetarian, one's a vegan.

- I know what she means, like the kind of person

who insists on buying a single story house

and then spends all her time on the StairMaster.

- What's that? - Mice.

- In the rooms. - This part's just the attic,

the rooms are over there.

- Mice. - Yeah,

we've had a problem and David's gonna take care of it,

he'll be over in a bit.

Who's David?

- He helped George with the cooking and the cleaning and-

- And pest control. - Well, sort of.

- Well, maybe we should get a professional.

I know a guy, I'll give him a call.

Well, it's no coincidence that music and boos

are set down on bars, that was George.

- So, this is it. - You've never been?

I guess we just let the years slip away.

- Well, let's be honest, she's riff, I'm raff.

- It wasn't like that, we talked on the phone a lot

and emails.

I just always assumed it would be-

- More. - I don't know.

- Well, George wasn't into anything too frivolous, you know,

he thought this was too much.

- And that room, there's like nothing in it.

We used that for dancing.

- To George. - To George.

To George.

A life fully lived.

- You know, he always spoke very fondly of you,

he was proud of you.

- Ah, by the time my ship came in, I was listing heavily

to the port.

I wished you could have brought Jax.

- Oh, I know but his ear infection was so bad,

the doctor recommended against it.

I mean, the flight would have been excruciating.

Although, I do feel guilty about leaving him with the nanny.

I feel guilty just having a nanny.

- Every Californian feels guilty about having a nanny.

Every New Yorker feels guilty when they don't.

- Well that gives us time to sort things out.

So, what do you think of Brooklyn?

- Seems like all the guys wear fancy hairdos

and all the girls have tattoos.

Tattoos are like human bumper stickers.

Yeah, it is a bit hipster out here.

- Well, I'm a total hipster, had both replaced.

- Please. - How was the drive?

- I think I might have pulled a muscle in my middle finger.

Did you know that Subaru is Japanese for super rude?

I told you, you should let me drive.

No, that's not gonna happen,

you're a registered traffic offender.

- Please. - And that Prius,

I think their engineered to go slow in the fast lane.

All those old Volkswagen van drivers.

- Enough. - Oh, what?

- Oh, it must be genetic. - It is.

Oh, wow, wow, a ballroom.

Hey, hey we made it, Mom. - Hi, James.

- Oh. - Oh, buddy.

Hey Dad, oh Dad.

Oh, Steven. - Hey buddy.

Hey, hey, hey, sis.

Oh still looks good.

- Hey, you got, oh my god, working out huh?

Oh, yeah, a bit.

- Well, lifting? - Lifting, yeah,

and holding down doubt.

Oh, this is David, David, come in here.

Come in here, we met on the stoop, he's great.

He did all of George's cooking and cleaning.

And pest control.

- Cleans for like everyone famous around here.

Giving me a new idea, housekeepers of the rich and famous.

Oh, that'd be great, James,

we'd watch that, right Gramps?

A bit intellectual comparatively.

Oh.

- Who needs a refresher? - Yes, please.

- James, why don't we change that to domestic engineers

of the rich and famous.

Yeah, yeah, I like that one.

Oh, I love this place, so simplistic

and the front door not working, I mean,

oh and the ballroom, oh classic George, very hipster.

- Hey, I heard your new show got picked up?

Yes, very exciting.

What is it?

- Cooking with clairvoyance, I call it "Medium Rare."

- Well done, James. - No, medium rare.

Please.

Well, at least half the cast is dead,

so you don't have to worry about.

- Quickest way to get a show canceled.

- Yeah, yeah, that show is gonna be a huge hit,

I know it all ready. - Different.

Fresh.

- Did you hear that? - What?

In the attic, it sounds like footsteps.

I don't hear anything.

Maybe just in your attic.

Maybe it's somebody from the afterlife

who wants to audition for cooking with clairvoyance.

You mean "Medium Rare."

That's more than mice.

Oh, no, it's definitely the mice.

- Are they chewing on the electrical cords?

- Might needs some more bait, I'll go check.

Want some help?

Another toast to George.

- To George. - To a great man,

a great musician and a great lover.

Could have done without that last bit.

- To George. - To George.

To George. - To George.

Oh my god, another presidential alert,

Lama spotted in Brooklyn, eyes everywhere catch the SOB.

Jesus, I hope he makes it.

I can't believe that guy gave up everything.

Well, everything except his good looks.

Oh, it's crazy times, new underground railroad,

Canada, the new north.

The guy's who's doing the most to reunite families

put in prison on trumped up charges.

- Yeah, they're charging him with terrorism.

They say that his escape is terrorizing the whole country.

- He didn't escape, they accidentally let him out.

- Maybe, I mean, half the guards are Hispanic,

so there's a big investigation.

- A well connected journalist could shed some light.

- It just feels like you're making a deal with the devil.

- Don't. - I mean, honestly,

I just can't see helping that guy in any way.

Yeah, it's just for a little bit

then I'll write my own ticket.

And just 'cause I'm working for him

doesn't mean I'm in his camp.

So, you're just gonna be a subversive.

No, I'm just doing a job,

I'm just gonna get my foot in the door.

With Sean O'Reilly, I mean that guy

is turning politics into a religion.

He actually said, and I quote, he said,

"Don't listen to what the president says,

just believe in him."

- Yeah, so then something needs to be done.

What about Jax?

He'll be fine, a lot of kids are raised

with the help of a nanny.

It doesn't feel right.

Well, so quit your job.

Jax would love that, Jax loves nothing more

than spending time with his daddy, except maybe trains.

- Hey, nobody can compete with that Thomas.

What about us?

- Okay, so we just take care of ourselves, nobody tries,

we just give up?

It's just, it's gonna absorb you

and then I'm never gonna see you.

Well, I'll do my best with that.

- And when we are together, you won't be there, I know you.

Well, I'll work on that.

Anybody but him.

This may be my only break.

I know it's a bitter pill, maybe I can influence him.

The puppet master, right, your plan now

is you're gonna influence the puppet master?

Yes, the puppet master.

That's like trying to influence Satan.

Well, you know how you influence Satan?

You don't believe in him and then he loses all his power.

You okay?

Oh, I couldn't sleep.

Before long, people won't have these anymore.

Ah, and then what will we do?

- Pass around our phones, look at each other's tattoos.

Well, that could be fun.

We should have come here sooner.

He could have come out.

- Well. - In fact,

you know he did come out.

Really, when?