Shaolin Soccer (Siu lam juk kau / 少林足球) (少林足球)

What is the meaning of this check? Do you want me to cheat?

No. I’m just the middleman.

Are you playing a joke on me, or trying to cause trouble?

Do you think you can replace me if l fail?

Look at this!

I’m the only Golden Leg !

- Make sure you remember that. - It's not that.

l just want a kickback. Please don't tell anybody.

You're trash !

I’m sorry. Catch you later.

Golden Leg ! Golden Leg !

You've been number one ever since Fung got his golden leg broken.

First as a player, then as a coach.

I’m better than Fung ever was.

Team Evil has won the Supercup the last five years.

- What's your secret? - Secret?

They just have the best coach.

So you're confident that your team will win again?

Are you new? Don't ask stupid questions.

Good morning.

Golden Leg.

Hung ! Good morning.

Hung, your shoe's dirty. Let me clean it for you.

It's okay. I’ll do it.

Hung, I’ll get the car.

Hung, you said if l worked hard l could coach my own team.

I’m ready!

l think l can train a team to be as good as Team Evil.

Do you really think I’d let you coach?

But you said-

Get real.

You're a joke.

Take a look at yourself.

This tattoo is all that's left of your fame.

Hung. . .

I’ve served you for 20 years. How can you say that?

Let's be honest. Things have changed.

You used to be a great player, but now you're nothing.

I’ve had enough.

I’ve kept you around for 20 years. . .

but it's time for you to take care of yourself.

Hung !

You've got a lot of nerve.

lf you hadn't tricked me with a bad check 20 years ago. . .

you'd be working for me right now.

lt was your idea to throw the game.

Are you throwing a tantrum?

Say it a bit louder. Did you guys hear that?

Make sure the reporters can hear it.

Say what you want. Take a look at yourself.

Do you think anyone would believe a crippled has-been like you?

- You- - Don't be angry.

lf you want to blame anyone, blame yourself.

Blame your own greediness.

Get lost.

One more thing. . .

l hired that mob to break your leg.

Yuppies.

They're not very skilled at playing soccer.

What was that?

l said. . .

they're not very skilled at playing soccer.

You think you can do better?

There must be a fusion of mind and foot.

What kind of fusion?

My late idol, Master Bruce Lee. . .

invented the ultimate kick.

lf you want to learn about it, I’ll give you kung fu lessons.

Kung fu lessons? You look like a janitor.

My job as janitor is only temporary.

I’m a postgraduate student.

Postgraduate student?

I’m trying to develop an effective method. . .

of promoting Shaolin kung fu.

Here's my card.

Authentic Shaolin school. Mighty Steel Leg.

Look! l know what I’m talking about.

l don't need kung fu.

I’m more of an intellectual.

lt doesn't matter.

Look at this woman.

Yeah, she's sexy. So what?

No.

Watch this!

lf she knew Shaolin kung fu. . .

she wouldn't have fallen. Get me?

Shaolin kung fu can work for everyone!

Excuse me! Do you want to learn kung fu?

Are you crazy?

Look over there.

lf she had studied Shaolin lron Hand parking would be much easier.

Kung fu is wonderful.

- Excuse me, do you want to learn- - Here. Get lost.

Hey, you should share that with me.

Let's not fight. See that guy?

What are you doing? You're way too slow.

That's it! You're fired !

- I’m sorry. - Get lost!

lf he knew Shaolin Flying Sword. . .

he'd still have a job!

You think Shaolin is the answer to everything.

There is nothing more powerful. All kung fu derives from it.

People have the wrong idea about kung fu.

lt isn't really about fighting.

Kung fu is a complete way of life.

I’m looking for a good way to show people. . .

how it can make their lives better.

- Enough already! - But-

l have important things to do. I’ve heard enough.

Please seize this opportunity! Cripples can still learn kung fu.

Who are you calling a cripple!

This leg has kicked hundreds of goals.

I’m sorry!

Do you know who you're talking to?

I’m the famous Golden Leg.

You're. . .

just a bum !

- You think I’m impressed? - Get these cans out of here.

- Okay. - Right away.

Cheap trick.

Get lost.

Excuse me! Can you help me move this?

No problem !

Your leg's amazing !

Twenty cents!

Only twenty cents? How about an advance?

No way! Get lost.

SWEET BUNS

Mui, ten steamed buns please!

Using Tai Chi kung fu to make steamed buns is a brilliant idea

They look so sweet and tasty

Your mastery is astonishing

It shows in your every movement

What are you doing?

Singing is the best way for me to express my greatest esteem.

Wow, what a beauty!

I’m not beautiful. Don't laugh at me!

l bet the steamed buns are wonderful.

Delicious!

Was that Shifting Bodies and Transposing Shadows?

No, it's Shove A Thousand Cattle with Four Tails.

Right!

That's why the buns are so tender, yet firm.

Sixty cents each. Two for a dollar.

That much?

They're worth every penny.

This is all l have.

- Can l pay tomorrow? - No!

Spoken with the grace and economy of a true kung fu master.

I’m a Shaolin master too.

- Can l pay tomorrow? - No!

Okay!

Here are some fine sneakers.

I’ll give them to you, if you let me have one more bun.

- I’ll call the cops. - Fine.

Come on, give me a break.

You're so beautiful.

Shut up!

Please stop singing.

Just pay and get out of here.

lf you want to sing, do it on the mountain.

Only crazy people sing here.

l disagree with the young lady.

Just because you sing out loud here doesn't make you a lunatic.

My name is Dynamite.

My dream is to become a great composer one day.

This gentleman's song is very creative and sincere.

- Thank you ! - You're welcome!

l also love to sing.

When I’m inspired l feel so passionate. . .

l could explode.

My dream is to become a great choreographer.

Let's go!

Have you lost your mind?

Stand straight! Put your hands down ! Get to work!

Lunatics!

What's going on here?

l never should have gone for a facial. . .

and left the place in your hands!

What do you want?

Relax. We were just having fun.

I’m here for the buns.

What about my buns?

Okay! Okay! Just a minute! Did that bum pay?

He did.

These are disgusting. Get rid of them !

First Brother!

Okay, okay. Keep working ! Clean everything !

Are you sick, First Brother?

I’ve got a bit of a hangover. What do you want?

- I’ve had a revelation. - A revelation?

How to promote kung fu in a brand new way.

Not again.

Singing !

You know we're great singers. You can't deny it.

- Leave me alone. - We owe it to our teacher.

He's dead.

- It's worth a try. - Forget it.

l told you to be down-to-earth.

There's an opening here. You can clean toilets.