The Last Seduction

I expect to see that on your income tax Marty.

I can't hear you people!

You maggots sound like suburbanites.

Fifty bucks for a lousy coin set, you sell one at a time?

And a hundred bucks for the next sucker who makes a triple sale.

A minute 50 seconds Bernie. D'you expect these leads to grow on fucking trees ?

Want me over your shoulder all day Bernie, huh?

Ask for the sale four times every time, got it?

You got twenty seconds to close it, Bernie.

Fifteen... I'm on your tail, Bernie.

Five... Four... ...at a price that would be stupid to pass up.

You'd have to be brain dead. Yeah. How many sets do you want?

- You got the shit, man? - Yep.

Hey, well give it up, bro.

As ordered. Pharmaceutical cocaine.

Come on you eunuchs! Zeke's closing his suckers six, seven times,

and he's got twice as many sales as the rest of you bastards.

You'll spend your Sunday here too if you don't take these bills from me.

Oh, shit.

Of course, of course.

What a stupid mistake. Go ahead!

Ah, we have a winner. Jerry... Who'd have thought? What'll it be, Jer?

Hundred bucks, or a thousand dollars worth of rare commemorative coins? Hmm?

You think I'm from Jersey?

Wise man.

Ah, Christ; a charmed life.

Go on! Go on!

Clay ?

Bridget, it's me. They moved it back. I'll be home when I can.

People saw flames shooting from the building, called the fire department.

By the time the engine got here it was too late,

and there were five dead young people.

How'd it go?

Did you get the money?

Did you?

You walk the streets like that?

You're an idiot.

Bridget, I didn't mean that.

Hey, I'm still hung up honey. These are very scary people.

Forgive me. Hmm?

I'll make it up to you.

You can hit me. Anywhere. Hard.

Oh, baby, baby, baby - let's not fight, right?

This is our penthouse. This is the key to the real city.

This is what you wanted. This is what we've been working for.

Seven hundred thousand.

This was a mistake.

This is just to take care of us during our residency

until the Doctor bucks start rolling in, right?

They're soft. I thought they'd be stiff.

These are laundered! Untraceable. Perfectly safe, right?

We have to put them somewhere.

You are a criminal mastermind!

It's just a hobby.

I wanna pay off that loan shark first thing tomorrow morning.

Oh, maybe he'll forget.

A hundred grand plus interest? I doubt it.

Stop.

You gotta give a little love.

Somethin' wrong?

Fear.

I'm gonna take a long hot one and then you and I are gonna celebrate.

Worth the risk, huh?

What do you wanna do tonight?

Go to the opera, or some kinda big Broadway show?

Fine dining experience?

Whatever you want.

Hey Bridge, do we have any shampoo?

How are we supposed to celebrate?

Hey, Bridge?

Bridget!

You better run!

Where the fuck am I?

Beston.

How far is Chicago?

Oh, ten, twelve hours. Depends on how fast you drive.

What's that bar like?

Hey, thanks a lot Mike.

- What, did Clarence make you beg? - I made him beg.

So why all the attitude?

I guess Mike didn't want his job back.

I just didn't want to come back to this dead end town, that's all.

So you, you wanna talk about it or...?

There's nothing to talk about. I went to Buffalo, it didn't work out. I'm back.

We already know all that.

- I guess he didn't want to talk about it. - I guess not.

Hi guys.

Hi, Mike.

Hi Stacy. How are you?

- Good, you? - Good.

Hi Stacy. How are you?

Grow up!

What? Did you leave your dick in Buffalo?

Chris, these women are anchors.

They're what?

They're planted here. You get too close to one, Beston's got you for life.

Yeah, yeah. Here he goes again.

How many guys in this bar have felt her up?

All of 'em.

And how many have gone home with her - how many have slept with her?

None, including yourself.

Right. I rest my case.

Don't rest it too long 'cos I promise you it'll fall off.

How do I look, do I look alright? Do you like this?

You look great.

Hey, Stacy.

- Hey, Chris. - How you doin'?

- So, er, tell me about the wife. - What ?

The wife, man. Copper wedding band.

Was it a kind of spur-of-the-moment decision or what?

I can't get this off.

Use a little octane man, take care of it.

I just never took you as the impulsive type.

Neither did I.

Did you divorce her?

I'll get around to it.

I cannot spend the rest of my life here.

I know what's gonna happen each and every day.

So when do you leave?

How long does it take to grow a new set of balls?

Gimme a Manhattan.

I know you hear me, pal.

Anybody need anything down here? Everybody good?

Jesus Christ. Who's a girl gotta suck around here to get a drink?

City trash, right? You don't take that?

What do you see in her?

Maybe a new set of balls.

- Gimme a Manhattan! - Ray, a Manhattan for the lady please.

Sure, Mike.

What - that's the game? I gotta say please?

Er, yes, it helps. You're not from around here?

Fuck off.

- Two dollars, please. - I got it Ray.

Thanks, Mike.

I er, I took care of that for you.

"Thank you" can also be very effective.

Could you leave?

Please.

Well I haven't finished charming you yet.

- You haven't started. - Give me a chance.

Go find yourself a nice little cow-girl, make

nice little cow-babies and leave me alone.

I'm er, I'm hung like a horse. Think about it.

Let's see.

- Excuse me? - Mister Ed, let's see.

- Look, I tried to be nice. I can see that something in...

I can be very nice when I try.

Sit down.

Maybe we just got off to a bad start. I know Ray's put plenty of people in...

What are you... What are you doing?

I believe what we're looking for has a certain horse-like quality.

- Are you serious? - Never buy anything sight-unseen.

Uh-huh. That's a good policy.

How many lovers?

What? Do I get extra credit points for experience?

How many lovers?

Thirteen... Tw-tw-Twelve.

- Any prostitutes? - No.

- Any men? - No. No men.

- Am I approved? - Medically.

- You have your own place? - Yes.

- Is it a sty? - No, it's clean.

Do you have indoor plumbing?

Yes, I have indoor plumbing, I have electricity and I have a name.

No names. Meet me outside.

Frank Griffith please.

Hi.

It's a local call.

It's personal.

Bridget.

- Always a pleasure. - You still a lawyer Frank?

Yeah, you still a self-serving bitch?

A friend needs advice. I'll set it up for you:

A husband and wife do a one-time drug deal - the goal's a wholesome one.

College fund for the kids?

No. The wife wants new digs. Comes off without a hitch,

only the wife decides that the new house would be happier without the husband.

Sharing was never her speciality.

She's anxious to start spending.

Well, it's just an opinion since you're not paying for it,

but the husband is entitled to half of whatever you buy with that cash,

in fact as soon as you turn it into a legal

asset like a condo or a house or a bank account

he can make a claim on it.

What are you saying?

My lips moving too fast for you?

Not fast enough, as I recall.

Now, now! Keep it in cash.

He's not gonna ask a judge for half of that unless he wants

to spend 20 years in Attica with somebody's dick up his ass.

So, what - hold onto it for how long?

Well, as long as it takes to er, finalise the divorce.

How long does that take?

He'll fight it - maybe 2 years. Less if you're lucky.

Jesus, Frank.

Well I'm sorry the law doesn't make it more

convenient foryou to steal and deal drugs, Bridget!

OK, start the divorce.

Well that's gonna cost you - it's a lot of paperwork.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fill in the blanks for me - I'm out of town.