Way... Way Out

* 10 *

* 9 *

* 8, 7 *

* 6, 5 *

* 4, 3, 2, 1 *

* you're gonna take a trip, girl *

* so slip into something slinky and smooth *

* way, way out *

* just wave the world good-bye *

* let's ride, 'cause, girl *

* I got a whole lot to prove *

* way, way out *

* I need to show you I know *

* you and me were meant to go the whole route *

* way, way out *

* and if you stick with me, girl *

* you'll see what the game of love's all about *

* way, way out *

* I'm gonna put a smile upon your face *

* get ready now, you better brace yourself *

* we're gonna take a trip in outer space *

* fly now and we'll pay later, girl *

* come on, and go with me *

* and you'll see what the game of love's all about *

* it's way, way out *

* way, way out *

* way, way out *

* way, way out *

* no time to pack your bag *

* just grab my hand and let me show you the way *

* way, way out *

* I've nominated you the girl *

* who I would like to lead me astray *

* way, way out *

* I'm gonna prove to you *

* that love is groovy *

* so you better watch out *

* way, way out *

* I aim to hold you, kiss you *

* teach you what the game of love's all about *

* way, way out *

* the moment that I saw you in the crowd *

* I planned to take you into orbit, girl *

* I'm gonna get us lost inside a cloud *

* 'cause that's the only way to fly *

* so put your trust in me and you'll see *

* what the game of love's all about *

* it's way, way out *

* way, way out *

* way, way out *

* way, way out *

* way, way out *

* way, way out *

* way, way out *

* way, way out *

This is colonel John "shorty" powers,

in lunar launch control.

And this story takes place

near the turn of the century.

Not the last century,

the next century.

Nothing very much has happened since the 1960's.

There is still a united nations

and peace in the world.

Or at least, what we have come to accept as peace.

This special moderating committee

of the united nations

will now come to order.

And the chair recognizes

the delegate from the Soviet union.

Thank you.

5 days ago,

on October 22,

a Russian woman citizen

Anna Soblova,

who is now operating

our weather station on the moon,

was fallen upon and attacked

without warning by one of

the United States personnel,

who is at present operating

the American weather station on the moon.

This completely unprovoked assault,

with deep sexual implications,

only failed because of

miss Soblova's previous experience

in fighting off attacks

of this nature.

The United States government denies

all knowledge of such an attack.

And knowing the high-type

of the fine, young American men

that America has sent

to its weather stations on the moon,

we feel sure that this attack,

if it occurred,

must have been provoked by the Russian citizen

miss Anna Soblova herself!

I charge that this high-type

of fine, young American men

are nothing but uncontrolled

sex offenders of the lowest type!

Sex offenders!

You wanna doubt me?!

I gave you the facts.

You know I'm right.

I'll not stand for this, sir!

No, no, no, no, no!

You can't close down, sir!

All right? I'll tell you that.

Not one moment, sir.

What are you? Pounding on the table with your shoe?

He's got his shoes off here!

Nyet! Nyet! Nyet!

Yes, there is peace on earth,

and great things are happening on the moon.

But we would be less than honest

if we didn't admit that there may be

trouble brewing up there.

Mr. Quonset! Mr. Quonset!

I'm not clear about a few charges

made at the united nations yesterday.

Please, please, let me repeat.

I have absolutely nothing more to say

about the outrageous charges

made by the Russians

at the united nations yesterday.

Then you deny that one of our boys up there

made an attack on that Russian girl?

Well, of course, I deny it.

I know the caliber of the men

we send to the moon.

I select them myself.

Don't they like girls?

She said, "don't they like girls?"

Naturally, they like girls...

With restraint!

Let us not forget we are talking

about American boys.

Now then.

As to the reason for calling this conference.

As you know,

ever since our lunar station was established,

it has been our policy to send up 2 men.

A weathernaut and an astronomer.

From now on, for reasons best known to ourselves,

we have decided that the team shall consist

of a male weathernaut

and a fully-qualified female astronomer.

Mr. Quonset?

Mm-hmm?

Do you mean to say they're going to send

a man and woman up there

to spend a year on the moon, alone, together?

Not a woman, a wife.

There's a big difference

between the two, you know.

When was all this decided?

Yesterday?

This has nothing whatever to do

with anything that happened yesterday.

This decision was taken some months ago.

Why? Is something happening up there

that we don't know about?

What could be happening on the moon?

The moon is a lonely, desolate post.

Naturally, certain difficulties arise

when men are subjected

to those kinds of stresses.

What stresses?

Personality disarrangement,

deep depressions,

the sort of friction

which naturally develops

between 2 men who have nothing

but each other for company

for an entire year.

To be quite frank,

the 2 men we have up there now

have tried to...

Have tried to do away with each other

3 times in the last 4 months.

Where do you plan on finding a weathernaut

who's gonna fall in love with and marry

a female astronomer?

It so happens that we have already found

just such a couple.

At about the same time

as our decision was made,

it came to our notice that a young weathernaut

had fallen in love with one of our girls

from the national space agency.

They have just returned

from a blissful 3-weeks honeymoon.

Do we get their names?

You'll get better than that.

At this time,

I plan to introduce you to...

As I was saying,

at this time, we plan...