Strictly Ballroom

Come on, 100!

Scott won most of the trophies in this room.

You see, that's the tragedy... my son was a champion.

Welcome to the Southern Districts...

Waratah Championships.

You're going to see some of the top dancers...

in the Southern Districts here today.

Well, there had been some silliness in the past...

but we thought he was over it. I mean, we never imagined...

that he would do such a thing in front of...

Federation President Barry Fife.

And don't forget the official Federation video...

yes, the only way to dance...

Wonderful to see you, Barry.

Barry Fife's "Dance to Win" is on sale here tonight.

Yeah.

Well, there was no doubt in anyone's mind...

that Scott and Liz would be...

the next Pan Pacific Grand Prix...

Amateur Five Dance Latin American champions.

I mean, they'd worked towards it all their lives.

And then... came that.

Samba!

Come on, Dennis!

Come on, 54!

Come on, 69!

Ken Railings and Pam Short were dancing there that night.

Ken's always been a wonderful ambassador for ballroom dancing.

Tequila.

But I know that everyone there...

really thought it was Scott's turn.

Come on, number 100!

It is true.

Scott and Liz became what we term "boxed in" or blocked.

Piss off!

It was no excuse for what Scott did.

What the bloody hell is going on, Kendall?

He resorted to his own flashy, crowd-pleasing steps.

Come on... come on.

He forced me into it.

Where the man goes, the lady must follow.

I had no choice.

I bet you never saw that before.

I keep asking myself why.

Did I do something wrong?

Did I fail him as a mother?

In front of Barry Fife...

I'll cut the music.

Don't be bloody stupid, woman!

Well, to pick what was actually wrong with the steps...

you'd have to be an experienced professional...

like myself or Federation president Barry Fife.

Barry Fife...

Well, of course, you can dance any steps you like.

That doesn't mean you'll...

win.

The winner is couple number 69, Ken Railings and Pam Short.

Ken and Pam are...

Southern Star Interregional New Vogue title holders...

Putting on the Ritz City and Country Inaugural...

Three Dance Round Robin champions...

Tulip Time Central Districts and Outer Lying Regions...

Winter Five Dance Two Time champions...

and more than three times Pan Pacific Grand Prix...

Amateur Five Dance Latin American champions!

Yes!

I've only been dancing for two years...

so I haven't got a partner yet...

but I thought what they danced was wonderful.

I thought they should have won.

Hi, Liz, I thought you should have...

Come all the way down from the Big Smoke.

Sorry.

- Liz! - Piss off!

- Liz. - Get away from me!

I'm not dancing with you, all right?

I'm not dancing with you...

till you dance like you're supposed to.

That's good.

Keep away from the chest, girls.

One, two...

One, two, three, four. Partner-up.

Happy as Larry they were last night...

on the phone for hours.

I'm just asking you. What did you think of the steps?

I don't think!

I don't give a shit about them! We lost!

Don't you worry about Barry.

Spinning the girl off!

Oh, Fran... are you out of that apricot scrub?

Nearly, Mrs. Hastings.

I'll bring some in tomorrow with the toner.

It's a dollar dazzler special this week.

Thanks, Mrs. Hastings.

Grand roulette in!

I don't want us to end up like that drunk, Ken Railings.

Ken Railings is a ballroom king!

Good, Clarry!

I'll smooth it over.

When Les Kendall talks, Barry Fife listens.

I've got my happy face on today, Les.

Everything's going to be all right.

Aah!

Oh, my God.

I'm sorry, Mrs. Hastings.

I am sorry. I have tried. God knows, I have tried.

But as far as I can see...

your son isn't even interested in winning at the Pan Pacifics.

As of this moment, he and I are no longer partners.

Hi, Liz.

Aah!

Vanessa!

Tango, please.

Oh, Vanessa!

Come on.

This stupid studio's a nightmare! Aah!

Oh, my God, Shirley.

Stay calm, Les. Stay calm.

Here he comes.

Doug... Doug.

Son, can I bend your ear for a tick?

Not now, Dad.

Don't you speak to your father like that.

He's trying to talk to you. Talk to him, Doug.

Scottie, are we going to do that bogo pogo?

Did you like the way I danced on the weekend?

- What? - Did you like the way I danced?

I don't know. You didn't win.

Yeah, but did you like it?

- I don't know. You ready? - What?

You were going to help me and Vanessa with the bogo pogo?

I'm asking you what you thought...

of the way I danced on the weekend.

I told you. I don't know.

Jesus, Wayne.

Mm-mmm...

We had an agreement.

Arms, Clarry!

Maybe I changed my mind.

Maybe I'm just sick of dancing...

somebody else's steps all the time.

Don't you get above yourself, lad.

People who have passed on those steps...

know more about dancing than you do!

The audience didn't think so.

Oh, the audience, the audience.

Forward on the heel, Fran!

What would they know?

Flashy, unusual choreography.

Crowd pleasing, but where was your floor craft?

Arms, Clarry!

No energy directed into the floor.

Untidy feet and hands.

You could've driven a truck between your left...

Arms, Clarry! And your right hand...

Think that's gonna win the Pan Pacific Grand Prix?

Does he really think that's going to win...

the Pan Pacific Grand Prix?

He also said that what we dance is crap.

What?

Yeah, and then... he ripped her dress.

And what's more, you won't win if you don't have a partner.

Looks like Scott and Liz are still fighting, Mrs. H.

I'm not going to let that bother me, Clarry.

I've got my happy face on today.

Well, Fran, you managed to upset Lizzy.

I better go and apologize.

Go to that little girl and beg forgiveness.

You're nothing without her, Scott.

Remember, it takes two to tango.

You've a light in you, boy. Let it shine.

Hi, Liz...

All right.

I knew you'd come to your senses.

No! I don't want this! I don't want this!

What do you want?

What do I want? I'll tell you what I want.

I want Ken Railings to walk in here right now...

and say, "Pam Short's broken both her legs..."

"And I want to dance with you!"

Aah!

Pam Short's broken both her legs...

and I want to dance with you.

That was unexpected.

Thank you very much, class.

That's it. Time to go.

Chairs, please, Clarry.

Broom, Natalie.

Ken's got his own spa bath.

Yeah. Great for the aching muscles.

I can do you a fantastic deal.

Oh, maybe. That's great, Mr. Railings.

Clarry, chairs.

Ken owns Spa-Arama.

Wayne and I are hoping to do really well this year.

Fran!

Hey, Wayne, come over here and meet Ken.

Kylie, feed the fish!

Doug, are you coming?

- He's my partner. - Fiance.