Sea of Fear

I can't believe you talked me into this.

Now, you're sure, like, all our gear...

And everything's on the boat?

Relax. I've taken care of everything...

All right?

I know, I know, I'm sure it'll be good.

You're not gonna see any of these guys...

Don't worry about it.

This is as close as you're gonna get.

I'll take your word for it.

Take my word for it.

This is my worst nightmare, you know that?

I mean, what part, are you nervous?

No. No, I'm not nervous.

Oh, that's it.

Nervous about spending the night with Ashley...

Would you shut up?

Well, look, you're the college athlete, but...

You're afraid of a girl.

Shut up.

Or you're swimming with the fishies.

Yeah, I'm really scared.

Well, you should be.

You know, I get it.

This isn't just a girl. This is a babe.

This is an Irish babe.

And did I mention rich?

Really rich?

Heir to the McDougal Industries rich?

Are you through?

No, I also hear that she's bad.

She's really, really bad!

Very bad.

Lance! No, dude, no.

Look, I'm not gonna put you wrong here,

I'm not putting you wrong.

These are the glory days.

Yeah, you keep telling me that.

So, there's nothing to worry about.

Is there?

Which one is it?

Hey!

Hey!

How you doin'?

You know, yeah.

What you got down there?

Uh, we got my room down here.

Really? I thought there were only 3 rooms on this boat.

Well, there were originally,

But, this is kind of a secret compartment,

Made it my own.

- Secret. - Yeah.

- Hey, baby! - Hey!

Hi, I'm Lance.

Hey, Ashley.

Nice to meet you.

You, too.

You're not gonna kiss me, are you?

I suppose that'd kill you. No.

Good answer.

Thanks.

Hmm, you two, let's go meet the captain.

Oh, my God, you gotta be kidding me.

This is not what we paid for.

Nice boat.

Yeah, it looks a little different than in the brochure.

You think?

Well, welcome to my boat, the Interficio.

It's a great day for sailing.

Glad you all could make it here.

You must be Kate.

Ashley.

Ashley, nice to meet you.

And you must be?

- Ashley. - What?

Just kidding! I'm Kate.

Nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you, Kate.

And you guys, who are you?

So, I'm Tom, and this is Lance.

Hey, how are you?

Nice to meet you. I'm the captain. You can call me Captain.

Do you take a check?

For the humor, yeah, for the vacation, no.

Yeah, I tried that. But paying for it...

with a check doesn't work.

Ok, um. And you are?

Oh, I'm Derek.

- Derek? - Yeah.

Do you work on the boat?

No, he's a passenger, hop on.

Oh, wait a minute, time out.

Derek, don't hop on board. Could you just...

Could you get off, 'cause...

Captain, no disrespect...

But, um... Actually, a little disrespect.

We just paid good money for it to be...

four people on the boat, remember?

Uh, yeah, we do have a problem then...

because the captain does like to navigate.

Seriously, though, I wasn't aware...

anyone else was going to be aboard, captain.

Who are you?

I'm Joel, the navigator and first mate.

Where's the second mate?

Power struggle, thrown overboard. I won.

Comforting.

What time do we shove off, Captain?

Five minutes. Disconnect the shore power line.

- Thank you, Captain. - You bet.

Who are all you people?

Now I know this was a bad idea.

Hey, Captain, where are we all going to sleep?

Hey, Derek, why do you care? You're not staying.

Oh, yes, I am.

No, you're not.

- Yes, I am. - No, you're not.

Oh, God. Come on, boys, cut it out.

You bunk down at the end of the hall.

Last door.

I actually worked to pay for this cruise.

I don't care.

Hey, look, guys, we don't want any problems.

- All right. - Right. No problem!

Whatever!

Ash...

Let's go see what we're paying for.

- Come on. - Kate...

- Come on! Let's see it. - Kate!

Well, I guess there's only two rooms left...

So it looks like...

Girls on one side, boys on the other.

Traditional.

Kate.

Hey, where do you think Joel sleeps?

I don't know.

Where do you think Derek's gonna sleep?

Ooh, good answer.

Come on. Let's check out our room.

So, Captain, you ever catch any big fish out of this boat?

- You bet. Big'uns. - Yeah?

It's all about the bait.

Captain.

Welcome aboard.

Everything's gonna be cool.

No problems, OK?

All right. No problems, whatever.

Who does that captain think he was?

Oh, I don't know. The captain?

Don't cross me, Lance.

Where did that come from? "don't cross you"?

May I remind you this is all your brilliant idea?

And who says cross anymore?

Shut up.

Yeah.

I must be in the wrong room.

Yeah, you got that right.

Actually, no, wait.

Why don't you stay, please, and I'll leave.

And actually, do you need a roommate...

back on the mainland?

Look, I'm sorry, we're having a little bit...

of a miscommunication here.

Which is ironic, because his girlfriend...

The Education major, she's been working with him.

Yeah, that's it. Come here.

Uh, look, maybe I can... Find another room.

The girls are right across the hall.

You two keep this room.

Yeah, all right, truce.

- What? - What?

Great, nice job, you dork.

What are they doing out there?

I don't know. Boys will be boys.

Why don't you get them all up on deck?

All hands on deck! Captain's orders.

Informational meeting. Welcome to the Interficio...

You're about to embark on the trip of a lifetime.

We're gonna go to the best diving and fishing...

and partying spots.

Tonight, we're going to a place called Pirate Island.

Life jackets, first aid equipment stored overhead...

in the compartment.

lf, for any reason, we start taking on water...

All seats become a flotation device, right?

No, you drown.

OK, get ready to set sail.

OK.

Gentlemen and ladies, the bar is open.

Whoo! Let's go.

Now, we're gonna be on Pirate Island tonight...

and I'll be using the dinghy to ferry everybody back and forth.

I can only take two at a time.

Here you go, babe.

Oh, thank you.

So...

is this where we sit around...

and tell horror stories by the campfire?

Captain, why do they call this Pirate Island?

I don't know. Pirates?