Katt Williams: World War III

Ladies and gentlemen, what a pleasure it is to be here this evening.

I'd like to take a second to let you know...

This is one of the most beautiful audiences I ever seen in my goddamn life.

You niggas came to see...

When I say niggas...

I mean all of us.

White people, y'all in the building this evening?

Make some noise, white people!

Look at niggas shocked. "What?"

And spread out, too.

We got the best of the best.

Where's my Hispanic family in the building? Where's the Latinx?

A-ha!

A-ha!

Well, you know there's a virus out there that will kill a motherfucker.

Got to be something special to have me here.

Let's see what it is.

Where's the ladies in the building? Make some noise.

Ladies in the building!

Mm-hm!

Did you smell that in there? That was a lot of good uterus.

Mm-hm. That was some high estrogen levels.

I got the best audience. And I had to have it.

A pandemic made you restructure your life.

You miss your family.

Y'all are my motherfucking family.

For the ten-year challenge, I don't even recognize this shit.

Is this the real world?

This shit is crazy. You don't know what to believe.

Don't nobody even make up conspiracy theories no more.

The truth is fucked up enough.

For everybody.

You don't know what the fuck to believe.

Some of y'all in here got three vaccinations and four boosters!

And you just as scared of the next variant as the next motherfucker.

We don't know what to believe.

Ten years ago, we even said we don't let motherfuckers tell us what to do.

We let them tell us, the worldwide doctors told us to get the vaccine.

These dirty sons of bitches, they ain't showing us not nair a doctor.

I guess Dr. Fauci made all the vaccines.

He the only one we ever see!

Don't get me wrong, I don't give a fuck.

I don't mind taking the vaccine.

When I take my dog to the vet, I get whatever shots he's getting.

He get a rabies shot, me too. That's my friend, bitch.

I'm as likely to bite somebody as he is.

Crazy world. You don't know what to believe.

The truth is just as strange as fiction.

Taco Bell...

selling chicken wings.

This is a revelation, bitch!

Crack you wide open at the scene.

Some of you niggas is tearing up them pigeon winglets.

Fucking up them Mac Tenders.

You don't know what the fuck to believe.

That's how it is.

You may not know what to fucking believe.

The truth can be stranger than fiction. They won't tell you shit.

They won't tell you that Wendy Williams is Sasquatch.

That bitch is Bigfoot!

Every time you see her go on hiatus,

that's when you start seeing sightings of Bigfoot.

The truth will come out later. You'll see.

Just saying, they'll tell us anything.

That's why it's called World War III.

'Cause there's a whole motherfucking war going on right now.

And they ain't telling us shit.

We don't even know whose side is what.

Whole war going on.

Fortunately, for us, it's simple. It ain't even complicated.

White people, don't get nervous.

It ain't about race this time.

Mm-mm. Ain't about money this time.

No, no.

This time it's a lie versus the truth.

Just that simple. A lie versus the truth. That's it.

Just a lie versus the truth. Ah!

The lie...

I'm not here to say what side is the best side.

I'm just saying, them's the sides.

Watch this. Where is all the lovers of truth at in the building?

Make some noise if you love the truth.

Whoo! Look at the lovers of truth. Strong in this bitch.

Keep that same energy.

Don't switch up on me.

So, lovers of truth. Watch this.

Where's all the liars in the building? Make some noise. Liars.

Yeah!

Look at the lovers of truth. "What? I didn't think they would tell the truth."

Liars do what the fuck they want to do.

Just understand, there's two sides.

You always got to have a proper respect for your opps.

One of these sides don't respect the opps.

The lovers of truth, they don't give a fuck about the lie.

And they will tell you,

"Bitch, this is the truth right here. I don't give a fuck!"

You tell them about the lie. The lie ain't shit.

Shit.

Liars run the world.

Better respect it.

Liars run the world. For every time one lie gets told,

one million people make one million dollars.

For every lie, you know who the fuck pays for it?

Whoever the fuck don't know it's a lie. That's who the fuck pays for it.

Yep. And they lie to all of us. Not some of us.

Look at white people, "Not us." Yes.

All of us.

They lie to us all together.

They told all of us in here.

There's a chicken wing shortage.

Look at people of all races and religions, genders and creeds all agree.

"They sure did say that."

They told all of us.

There's a chicken wing shortage.

Doesn't matter how much we all love chicken.

We didn't riot in the streets.

We didn't burn burger places down.

We just believed them.

But liars always leave a clue.

They think they smarter than them is.

They say it to all of us, "There is a chicken wing shortage."

Did you notice they did not say it was a shortage of chickens?

Said it was a chicken wing shortage.

But they did not say...

it was a shortage of chickens.

Now, I know some of y'all don't grow up on the farm.

Maybe you don't see a chicken every day.

But try to envision in your mind what a chicken looks like.

'Cause if a liar can get you to believe some shit,

they don't stop there. They double down.

Just so you knew they was lying, they said some shit next,

that don't even make mathematical sense.

They said there's a chicken wing shortage...

but we got plenty of thighs.

Where the fuck would you get plenty of thighs from, bitch?

Look, I'm not a farmer.

Or a scientist. But I will tell you this,

all chicken wings… come from a chicken.

They get two wings, two thighs.

So don't start talking about you got a whole bunch of thighs.

Where the fuck are you getting these spider leg chickens from?

See, the problem is, some of y'all believe in God,

some of y'all believe in science.

I believe in both.

Science might have done some things, and God did some things.

Science might have made a lot of shit, but God made the chicken.

You ain't going to tell me. God made the chicken.

He did that for the world.

That's how you know it's from God.

What group of people don't fuck with chicken?

Look at the vegans. "Just us."

God made the chicken.

That bitch ain't safe nowhere.

Every time a chicken's foot hits the ground,

somebody want to put that bitch in grease.

In China, in France, in Europe, in Mississippi.

That's how you know God made it,

because that bird is the most delicious bird.

In the whole world!

And that motherfucker can't fly.

'Cause God loves you.

If chickens could fly, half the motherfuckers in here

would be dead right now if you had to...

if you had to catch your own two-piece, you'll die.

You just in the backyard...

"That was a spicy combo, too. I can't keep missing these opportunities."

Anyway...

I'm just saying, figure out what you can trust.

'Cause it used to be it was people out there that we trusted.

Their job made us trust them.

That they would do the right thing by us.

That shit is gone-gone.

Been gone.

What the fuck you mean?

They want you to do shit that don't make no sense.

That's why I won't even talk about politics no more.

Ain't shit to talk about.

What the fuck I'm supposed to do if both sides is the dumb side?

I don't even want to play no more!

What the fuck is this shit?

But that's America.

We just don't want what we had last.

Ten years ago, some of you ladies was with a full-fledged gangbanger.

Look at you ten years later in here with that bank teller.

You look like you work at the bank.

That's how our country do.

We don't give a fuck. Just don't give us the last shit.

We traded in a crazy, deranged, erratic motherfucker.

We traded him in

for a Weekend at Bernie's.

Too much going on.

You can't believe nothing that people say.

This is some crazy shit.

You motherfuckers is vicious.

You don't give a fuck about nobody.

Motherfucker, I'm so sick of motherfuckers talking shit about Joe Biden.

"Joe need to get his shit together."

"You need to wake up, Joe."

"Go Brandon, Joe."

What the fuck is wrong with you people?