Tees Maar Khan (तीस मार खान)

Every era has a messiah...

who rules the hearts of the people...

who shows them a new way of life...

who showers them with happiness.

This story is not about such a messiah.

Dear, you're a policeman's wife.

Is it okay to watch these heist movies all the time?

Yes, I like them.

Dear, just think about it.

If you watch such movies in this condition...

then what effect will it have on our baby?

He'll be born a thief.

The way Abhimanyu from Mahabharata, learnt everything about archery...

while in his mother's womb.

Be quiet, you drunkard.

My son won't be a thief. He'll be a very successful man.

People will long to catch his glimpse.

And the moment they see him, they'll inform the police.

Be quiet! Let me and my son watch the movie.

-What happened? -The tank's leaking.

-Should I call the plumber? -What plumber, you idiot? My water broke.

Let's go to the doctor.

-Congratulations! It's a boy. -Thank God.

-And my wife? -Both the baby and the mother are fine.

In a while she will--

My watch?

My chain?

Last night we cracked the largest antique smuggling racket...

in the history of crime.

Our country's thousands of years old...

priceless diamonds, pearls, jewelry, paintings, statues.

In all, we stopped 10,000 kilos of national treasure

from being sold to foreign countries.

In the international market, the approximate value...

of these items is five billion.

The Interpol suspects that this stuff belongs to...

the Johri Brothers. The antique smugglers.

These Siamese twins aren't among those...

who'd let go of their goods so easily.

They will surely try to get them back.

Hence, our job doesn't end here.

Our next mission is to get these goods...

to the government treasury in Delhi.

And the name of this mission will be Bharat--

Bhushan.

And the name of this mission will be...

"Bharat Ka Khazana."

In this mission, we will transport this treasure

in a special high security train to Delhi.

Remember, this train will go directly to Delhi.

There will be no halts in between.

Now, the Johri Brothers have only one way to get the antiques.

-To steal it from a moving train. -He's talking nonsense.

As we all know, the Johri Brothers don't execute

their illegal work themselves.

As always, they will take someone else's help.

But who is brave and smart enough...

to steal the treasure from right under our noses...

and that too, in broad daylight?

Broad daylight?

He can do it in the darkness of the night as well.

And why "from under our noses?"

He can do that behind our backs as well. Right?

As per our information, only three people can do this job.

First candidate is...

From Hyderabad, Ismail Sheikh alias Ismail "Koyla."

Is Ismail darker than coal? Or vice verse?

That's hard to say.

Ismail possesses two weapons.

One, the darkness of the night.

And second, Ismail's smile.

In the darkness of the night, like a shadow in the dark...

Ismail just disappears.

He escaped again.

That's why we've not been able to catch Ismail. Right, sir?

A few years ago, Ismail tried to rob Salarjung Museum.

But this time, unfortunately, I got his case.

Sir, unfortunate for you or him?

Jagtap, shut up and listen.

But by then, his tricks had become obsolete.

Ismail, why don't you stop these robberies...

and lead an honest life?

I have a mind-blowing job offer for you.

You'll get a million for an hour.

The headlights of the express train aren't working.

You have to run ahead of it with your teeth exposed.

There he is. Catch him!

The second candidate is Master India.

Mr. India was a decent guy.

Master India is his spoilt kid...

who is taking undue advantage of his great father's powers.

Where Ismail Koyla steals quietly in the darkness of the night...

Master India steals in broad daylight and in public.

He stole the necklace and disappeared.

Since that day, I attended every party, function and wedding...

in order to catch Master India.

And then one day...

On the pretext of shaking hands, I exchanged his bracelet.

Master India thought he's invisible.

And he started dancing nude in celebration.

He didn't know that everyone can see him.

Master India, the commissioner is happy.

And that leaves the third candidate who is still roaming free.

From Mumbai, Tabrez Mirza Khan alias Tees Maar Khan.

His fans also call him half Robin Hood.

Why half Robin Hood, sir?

Because he steals from the rich...

but doesn't give it to the poor.

India's sharpest criminal mastermind, Tees Maar Khan.

Gentlemen, there's good news.

-Is Mr. India part two about to begin? -You...

We've just received information...

that Tees Maar Khan was arrested in Paris.

He was giving autographs to his fans.

Unfortunately, one of those fans was an Interpol agent.

Gentlemen, as we speak, Tees Maar Khan is being brought to India.

Eat as much as you want today.

Tomorrow, you'll have to eat prison food.

Right, brother?

Saving the honor of a harlot and imprisoning Tees Maar Khan...

Both are futile.

Tomorrow, I'll have lunch at home...

with my mother and not in prison.

Man, I don't get it.

Boss got arrested in Paris.

Then why did he ask us to be here with the car?

Can't the Mumbai police send their own vehicle?

Burger, you idiot! Boss has planned to trick the police.

That's why we're here with our car.

-Boss's plane! -Where?

-Over there. -Not here. Over there.

Hey, look.

Some big hero is getting off over there.

-Where? -Show me.

Idiots, that is our boss. Look.

-Boss? Just a minute. -Boss!

Great!

Khan of Khans, Tees Maar Khan.

Come on.

What is it?

-Burger, Dollar, Soda... How are you all? -We're fine.

Boss, car.

That's not our car. It's this one.

Boss, tell us what this is all about.

Yes, boss. This golden suit, chains and all.

This rock solid car and all those kisses back there.

Boss, tell us. How did you trick the police?

Saving the honor of a harlot and imprisoning Tees Maar Khan.

-Both are... -Futile!

Both are...

Forget him. Tell us, boss.

A few days ago... Hey, eyes on the road.

But ma'am, dogs are not allowed on the plane.

How dare you? How dare you call Penny a dog?

Sorry, ma'am. She doesn't know who you are.

-Please sit down. -But, sir...

You come with me.

Are you crazy? Pankaj Shukla is her father.

-Go and apologize to her. -Okay, sir.

Go on.

-Later on. -Okay.

-I'll do it right here. -Okay.

Alright! I know you're Tees Maar Khan.

But this is a toilet on a plane.

Not a toilet in High Court...

from where you can jump out and escape.

Just like the last time. Understand?

Right, brother?

If you're done with your lousy jokes, then can I?

Go.

Don't push. Otherwise, I might end up doing it right here.

He's so thick-skinned. He started flirting here as well, brother.

-Come on. -Where? Out of the plane?

Yes, out of the plane. Sit quietly.

You did this on purpose to take revenge on Penny.

I'll go and clean the dog.

I'll go...

We're really sorry, ma'am. Please let it go.

I won't let you go so easily. I'll cancel your license.

Stop the plane. Land right now!

How can we land now, ma'am?

Why? Aren't there any brakes in the plane?

Just apply the brakes and land.

Oh, God! Captain Bhalla, please talk to her.

Hey, you! Where are you going?

To apply the brakes.

-Ma'am, try to understand. -How can he talk to me like this?

-Just see. What has happened to my Penny? -Captain Andrew!

Captain Andrew!

-What are you doing here? -I was in the toilet.

All three captains are outside.

So, who's flying the plane?

This idiot Captain Andrew has put the plane on auto-pilot.

Now all the three captains are outside the cockpit...

and the door isn't opening either.

We're dead. We're finished.

Please calm down.

-I am going to sue you. -Please calm down.

Silence. Don't fight.

Let's try to open the door.