Looking

Your breath is terrible.

- Go back to sleep. - Oh my god.

Go back to sleep.

Mmm.

All right.

Okay.

Hey.

Wake up, sleepy...

Shit! Oh my god!

Ow. Just... just go back to bed.

Is it another earthquake?

No no, me and my stupid butterfingers.

Are you making me breakfast in bed, Patrick Murray?

Yeah, I was trying to, yeah.

Just leave it. Don't cut yourself.

Ugh, I even made a special trip to get goji berries.

Patrick, please come on. We'll tidy that up later.

Just come back to bed.

Okay. Oh god.

That's so sweet.

Oh god, I got granola on my feet.

Don't need breakfast in bed. You in bed is enough.

Mm-hm.

- Minty fresh. - Of course.

Mm.

You're really excited about tomorrow.

I am. I am.

Do you think that that fantasy bisexual

goth princess from Austin will be there?

She's at every GaymerX, and she always has the coolest stuff.

- Does she? - Yeah, the best.

But will she have otters battling banjee boys?

- That's the thing. - I hope not.

Well, if she does, we're screwed.

No, are you kidding? We're so going to be the hit of the conference.

- You think so? - Yeah.

We're taking gay-related apps to the next level.

I'm seeing like the cover of "Time" magazine.

That's if it actually works.

I don't even think it can stand alone as it is.

I hate putting something out in the world that isn't perfect.

Well, it's close enough, okay,

and I'm not waiting another year for this to come around.

We're doing it.

Okay. Well, I'm excited as well.

Clearly, yeah, you're excited.

Do you, uh, ever wear pants?

How long are you staying here again?

Oh, are you tired of me already?

Oh, I'm this close to calling INS.

Morning.

Wow.

Okay, two weeks, you guys are now sharing clothes, huh?

What? It's cute,

and I haven't done my laundry in weeks.

Yeah, it's a choice.

What? If it looks stupid, I'm gonna change it.

It's fine.

Fine?

What does that mean?

Okay, this is that moment

when Daddy's about to hit Mommy at the dinner table,

so I'm gonna go ahead and excuse myself.

The whole point of having a boyfriend

who's the same size as you is

so you can double your wardrobe.

I wear that to work a lot.

Oh, come on. We work at MDG, not Vogue.

This isn't the "Devil Wears Dog" shirt.

Patrick, we talked about doing this a certain way.

Doing what?

First we tell people that I've broken up with Jon,

and then we allow a courtesy gap.

Oh god, the courtesy gap was a real thing?

Um, yeah.

When Brad broke up with Jennifer,

he didn't want people to know

he was fucking Angelina straightaway.

There was a courtesy gap.

All right, well, I was always Team Jen, so.

Oh god, you don't think people are gonna be Team Jon, do you?

I'm just trying to be sensitive about this.

And I totally get that,

but didn't we also talk about taking baby steps?

I mean, so far we've just been cloistered

in my room like gay nuns.

Gay nuns who have a lot of sex and eat a lot of pizza.

That's very true, but...

that doesn't feel like moving forward.

Right?

- We've established a tension that... - Doesn't have a payoff.

So we've found that we lose most users at this point...

Because the gameplay falters here.

You guys have got to stop

finishing each other's sentences.

It's called teamwork, Owen.

Isn't it fun to be on a great team?

I mean I guess, but I... I think it's a little weird

that you guys even buy the same sweater.

- Right? - Yeah.

I didn't buy this sweater.

No.

That is my sweater.

Yeah, he said I could borrow it

as long as I promised not to spill anything on it.

Yeah, Butterfingers here spilled goji berries

and yogurt all over his floor this morning.

Wait. Why were you at his house

so early in the morning?

Because he... he stayed over.

Li... like in your bed?

Yeah.

Because you guys are a thing now?

Um, yeah, that's one way of putting it.

Uh, so Jon's totally out of the picture now?

Because he was supposed to work on my sciatica.

Hey, dude, I can't get a heads-up?

A heads-up about what?

We've sat next to each other for how long?

Owen.

Okay, if we can move on, that would be really great.

Yeah, we're good.

Good. Because we're all adults here. It's really no big deal.

Yeah, I just hope it won't impact our company culture

of fairness and that heterosexuals won't be discriminated against.

Of course, Meredith. Um, absolutely.

I think Owen was really pissed I didn't tell him.

Well, maybe he's just upset

that his friend is sleeping with his boss.

Do you know that Meredith marched straight to HR

after our meeting?

Oh my god. You don't think they could actually fire us, do you?

What? No.

But there will be some whisperings

and there may be some bitchy comments

written on the toilet walls.

Well, whatever.

The gay genie is out of the gay fucking bottle.

Yes, it is.

It'll just take some people a little time to get used to it.

Do you think your sister will ever get used to it?

Well, Megan thinks that I destroyed

the most perfect relationship in the entire world, so no.

- But, whatever. - Mm-hm.

I'm glad that it's out in the public, you know?

- It makes it more real. - Mm.

This isn't some weird, secret thing anymore.

It's something we can be proud of.

Well, I am, 100%.

Well, you should be, 'cause I'm a fucking catch.

- Are you? - Yeah.

Especially in this sweater.

So, it's, you know, it looks a little messy right now,

but it's gonna be great, I think.

Yeah. Absolutely.

I know I rushed into it, and I didn't

wait for the money to come through.

Yeah, well, I told him not to rush it, you know?

And I quit my job and maxed out my credit cards,

and I'll probably end up homeless.

But... how exciting is this?

This is so exciting.

I mean it, too. I'm not being sarcastic. I love it.

This is my place, and I can hardly believe it.

Well, it's incredible, man.

Cheers.

- Cheers. - Cheers.

- Cheers. - Yay.

Cheers, queers.

- Ew. - Oh god.

Apparently I need a new fridge, too.

Yeah, you are setting the stage

for your first one-star Yelp review. Gross.

If you really wanna help, you could come put in

the water filtration system with me tomorrow.

Tomorrow's Vallejo.

- Vallejo? - Mm-hm.

My niece is having a birthday,

but if you wanna stay and help, babe, it's fine.

No, no, no. I wanna meet 'em.

We can do the water thing later, right?

Well, if we don't put it in tomorrow,

then I'll have to change a whole bunch of...

But you know what? Don't worry about it.

Just go. I'll call one of the guys to help.

No. You know what? We'll come afterwards,

after we're done, all right?

- Seriously. - We don't have to stay over.

Seriously, don't worry about it.

Look at your chicken window.

- Look at this. - Look at it.

I'm so proud of you.

I am so proud of you.

I'm proud of me, too.

Are you sure we're ready for this?

Completely, yeah.

Hurry, let's get in there.

- Hello. - Hi.

Hi, hi, we're really late.

It should be under One Up Him, but if it's not...