Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls

Negative. No sign.

Wait a second. I think I got him.

You know,

you could put somebody's eye out with that thing.

We airlifted out the last passengers, Ace.

We're heading out.

What about the animal cargo?

Don't worry about it. It's just one little raccoon.

If I were you, I'd turn back.

Yeah? Well, if you were me, then I'd be you,

and I'd use your body to get to the top.

You can't stop me no matter who you are.

Hoo hoo hoo!

Loser.

Loo-hoo-se-her.

Hungry, fella?

That ought to hold you for a while.

That's okay, Spike.

There's nothing more we can do.

Look, Spike.

Do not fret, my little woodland friend,

for your life is in the hands of Ace Ventura, pet detective.

Whatever you do...

Don't look down.

No!

Hang on! Hang on, little buddy!

I got you. I think I got you.

Uh, maybe not.

You're slipping.

Don't let go!

No!

Oh.

Oh.

My goodness.

Aah!

Well, hello. Yes.

Well, now, that was quite a shock.

It's, um...

It's extremely nice to meet you.

Now, my name is Fulton Greenwall,

and I am looking for an Ace Ventura.

No man here carries with him a label.

What?

Oh, yes. No names. How silly of me.

Well, um, he's an American.

We are all children of the same life force.

Yes, of course we are.

Well, he bends over,

and he speaks from his rear.

Oh, him.

Right this way.

He came to us a broken man.

He had lost the will to sustain his existence.

Yes, I heard about that unfortunate accident

with the raccoon.

It was terrible for him,

but the life force once again smiled upon him.

He's now at peace.

I will wait here.

- Aah! - Aah!

Oh! Oh!

I must apologize.

Quite. Well, no harm done.

Let me introduce myself.

My name is Fulton Greenwall,

and I'm sent here to employ your services

in the retrieval of a lost animal.

Now, can you help us?

Your request is not unlike your lower intestine...

stinky and loaded with danger.

We can pay you handsomely.

I am now a child of light.

Your earthly money holds no appeal to me.

$20,000.

Re-e-e-e-eally?

No.

I cannot, for I am sorely needed

here...

at the ashram.

If I may interject!

We are short of space,

and it's important for you to use your talents.

Let me help you pack.

But I am yet to attain omnipresent supergalactic oneness.

No. Wait.

There it is.

You have just attained it.

- I have? - Yes. Just now.

You are one.

I can see it in your eyes.

You're more one than anyone.

What about my medallion of spiritual accomplishment?

Take mine.

This took you 80 years to achieve.

That's okay.

I don't like it anymore. Really.

In the light of this personal sacrifice you've made...

I have no choice...

but to take the case.

Great! I'll go tell the others!

Master...

Break it to them gently.

I've never seen them act like that before.

Denial can be an ugly thing.

Well, we should go, Mr. Ventura.

I've arranged a plane.

I'll meet you at the bottom.

There's still one more thing I must do before I go.

Isn't this incredible?

It's gotta be some kind of a record.

Oh, man! Can you believe it?

It was right there!

Can I do it one more time?

Please forgive me, sir, but if we don't hurry now,

we might miss the plane.

Of course. How selfish of me.

Let's do all the things that you want to do.

Canadian moose during mating season.

And now...

a yak.

Peanuts?

Yes. I have one right here.

It's bulky, but I consider it carry-on.

Peanuts.

Oh, I see.

If we can get back to business, Mr. Ventura?

The Wachati are a peaceful tribe.

Since their sacred animal has vanished,

they believe that there is a curse fallen on their village.

It all started some time ago.

And so the daughter of the Wachati chief

is set to wed the first son of the Wachootoo tribe,

and the sacred animal was offered as dowry for the marriage.

But if it is not recovered,

the result will be

the merciless slaughter of the Wachatis.

Uh, Mr. Ventura?

Mr. Ventura!

There's someone on the wing...

some...thing.

I'm sorry. What were you saying?

The daughter of the Wachati chief

is set to wed the first son of the Wachootoo tribe.

"Bonai Province, Nibia"

Spectacular.

This land holds great beauty.

How far to the crime scene?

Well, I've been instructed to bring you first to the consulate,

which should be beyond those trees

on the other side of the jungle.

So we'll have to circle around...

Ha ha ha!

Oh, no!

Steering's a little loose.

Aah! Alignment's off, too.

Mr. Ventura!

- Aah! - Aah!

Oh, there's the consulate.

Oh, thank God.

If I can just find a parking spot.

Perhaps we should slow down just a teensy-weensy bit.

Nonsense, poopy pants.

We're going a bit fast!

- - Really! Look out!

Like a glove.

You might want to think about getting this baby detailed.

Oh, no. The Consul General's car.

Down, Boba.

- That's it. Down. -

Yes. Good.

Come on, man.

Whoa.

Mr. Ventura.

So looking forward to your arrival.

Uh!

Funny. It didn't seem that painful