Red Eye

Let's go.

- Taylor. Bob and Marianne Taylor. - Just bear with me one second.

- There are other hotels in Miami. - I'm sorry.

What is the problem here? We made these reservations over six months ago.

- I know, I'm just not seeing it. - Where's Lisa?

- Lisa always takes care of us. - She's out of town.

- Her grandmother passed away. - Cynthia?

- Yes? - Would you get in more trouble

if you bothered her or if I called corporate?

OK.

Damn! Dallas drivers!

Who taught you how to drive? Stevie Wonder?

- You'll catch your plane. You got... - Ten minutes.

- Lisa Reisert. - Lisa? Hi.

I'm so sorry to call, but I didn't know what to do. I have a situation.

- Slow down. What's the problem? - Bob and Marianne Taylor.

Yep. They're regulars.

Yeah, well, I think I sort of erased their reservation.

I was never checked out on this system.

Did I mention I had a confirmed reservation? This is my receipt.

I downloaded it off the Internet myself.

- I know, Mrs. Taylor, calm down. - Don't say that. No...

- Calm down? - She told me to calm down.

Don't tell us to calm down. We've been very calm right up until now.

- I'm so sorry. Lisa? - Cynthia, tell them one more minute,

- they'll be happy, you promise. - One more minute. You'll be happy.

- I promise. - We better be.

Now, enter my PIN. It's 7-8-8... Hang on.

- Dad? Hold on. - Lisa?

- Can you hold on? - Sure.

OK, it's 7-8-8-4-underscore-I-Reisert.

- Lisa, I'm so sorry for calling. - No, no, no, it's fine, it's fine.

- Are you logged in yet? - What do I do?

Click on the Crisis folder, you'll see a list of empty rooms,

give 'em fourth-floor, comp 'em for tonight and tomorrow.

OK, just a sec. OK, you are all set.

The first two nights are gonna be on us.

And if you need anything else, just let me know.

We won't.

This is not my fault.

God, they totally threw me. They were such assholes.

There are no assholes. Only guests with special needs.

- Here we are. - Keep it. Anything else?

The Simpsons didn't get the California King they requested.

What else?

- Oh, my God. - Tell me.

Security left a message saying the Charles Keefe party

will be arriving at 5:30am instead of pm.

That's not that unusual. It's a security thing.

Make sure our guys have the entrance set, his security takes it from there.

Is Mr. Keefe Platinum Club or something or...?

Political. Homeland Security.

Make sure there's a box of Montecristo Cubans in the room

and a bottle of Cristal on ice. It's 3825.

- OK. Got it covered. Safe flight. - Thanks.

Attention passengers leaving on flight 1387.

- Lisa Reisert. - I'm still here.

Dad, I'm so sorry.

- It's fine, sweetie. - What's up?

Gearin' up for another sleepless night with a comedy marathon.

Before I forget,

that book I gave you, you finish it yet?

Almost.

You know, he's from Texas. I didn't think shrinks came from there.

Yeah, they do. They just move to California and start TV shows.

- How's the remodeling? - Good. Good.

They made headway in the last few days.

I lost my wallet, but that's par for the course. It's lookin' good.

That's good. I can't wait to see it.

You should. The upstairs hallway is totally unrecognizable.

- Your room hasn't been touched. - No, Dad.

Please, go nuts, make it into a gym or a putting green.

You know I can't do that.

You never know when you might just wanna spend a few nights back here.

You know? Make an escape from the day-to-day.

Day-to-day, it's where I thrive. You know that.

Right.

So,

- how's your mom holdin' up? - As good as can be expected.

You? What about you? You all right?

- Yep, I'm fine. - You sure?

Everything's fine, Dad. You're gonna have to start takin' my word for it.

Look, I gotta go. I gotta check in.

You sure you don't need a pickup?

- I thought you lost your wallet. - Leese, it's just five minutes.

I'm taking the red-eye. It's the last flight.

It's gonna be late. I love you. I'll call you.

- I love you too, sweetie. - OK, bye.

Attention. We have a cancellation update. Flight 1192 has been canceled.

Anybody who was on the flight to Atlanta that was canceled,

come to the front of the line so we can reroute you.

Flight 1019 to Miami...

- I'm sorry. - Don't sweat it.

I'm wearing my combat boots.

- Excuse me? - Travel is war these days.

Yeah.

I just love him.

How is that? Are you learning a lot?

I'm not really sure.

He's so handsome.

I work during the day so I always miss his shows.

Flight 247 to Cleveland has been delayed.

- Here. That'll catch you up. - Oh, no. No, no, I... I couldn't.

I'm finished. My Dad's given me so many, I could start a library. Please.

- That's very nice of you. - Once again anyone who is scheduled

on the flight to Atlanta, if you wanna get out of Dallas tonight,

come to the front of the line at this time.

Excuse me. You're letting them go,

but we've been standing for an hour? How does that happen?

If we don't re-book, they miss their flight.

It doesn't matter that you canceled my flight then rerouted?

- I understand. - Get your boss. This is ridiculous!

Don't make her do that. She's doing the best she can.

I don't think I was talking to you

- I realize that... - I'm trying...

Please, sir.

She is the one standing between us getting out and anarchy.

- Yeah, but she's not the one in... - She's exhausted, worked 18 hours,

and she suspects we all hate her just as much as you do.

What do you say we give her a break? Let her get back to a job

I'm guessing is a lot more thankless than yours.

This airline sucks.

Next in line, please.

That's me.

Here.

Thank you very much. And thank you.

You're welcome.

Yeah. Thank you.

Not at all. That was just backup.

- You got the ball rolling. - Yeah.

- Reflex, I guess. - Why is that?

I work in a hotel. I deal with people like that all the time.

The Marriott? The Hilton?

- The Lux Atlantic It's in... - Miami.

- Right. I know it well. - Yeah.

- So you're on this... - Very delayed flight to Miami. Yeah.

- You? - Yeah. Sadly, yeah.

But you know what? That's why God created the Tex-Mex.

The best nachos in the airport and right across from our gate.

Good tip. Thanks.

Save you a seat.

Yeah, that was... I thought since we're on the same flight...

I didn't mean to invade your personal space or...

- No. - I can take you over here.

- I just... I have a few calls to make. - Sure. I understand. You go ahead.

- Have a good flight. - OK. You too.

We will be updating you with the departure time

of flight 1019 with service to Miami...

- Hi. - Hi. You must be Rebecca.

- Yes. - Well, my name's Mary,

and I hear this is the first time you're flying by yourself.

Well, you must be very brave.

- Are you gonna be OK? - Yes, Mom.

- Are you sure? - Yes, I'm sure.

- I'm just asking. - I'm 11, not nine.

Come with me, you two.

There you go, sir. Your nachos. Careful, hot plate.

Thank you, sir.

Oh, my God! I am so sorry.

- It's iced. Don't worry. - OK.

- Let me find you napkins. - No, no, no. It's fine.

- Are you sure? - Yeah.

OK. Larry,

could you run back to Starbucks? I need another mocha.

- Finish that one already? - Someone's wearin' it.

Ladies and gentlemen, your attention.

Flight number 17 leaving Dallas National Airport from gate two

will be delayed for 20 minutes.

Paging a skycap with electric cart to gate four.

Paging a skycap with electric cart to gate four.

- Hi. - Hi.

- Is this taken? - No, it's all yours.

Thanks.

So did you get your calls made?

Yep. No more calls.

Good. What will you have?

- No, it's... I'm OK. - If I can guess...

OK.

I'm feeling vodka.

Definitely sweetened.

Cosmo. Way too common.

Screwdriver.

No. No. No. Way too boring.

So that leaves me with the simplicity of the grapefruit

or the complexity of the pineapple.

Grapefruit sea breeze.

- Could I have a bay breeze? - You got it.

Thanks.

It's an impressive talent, though. Very close.

- You know, breaks the ice. - Yeah.

- So are you headed home? - Yeah. Trying.

Yeah. Flying's so much fun these days.

Fun for me is just getting off that plane in one piece.

- Fear of flying? - Yeah. Just a little.

Were you in Texas on hotel business?

No. My grandmother died.

It's OK. She was 91.

- Ninety-one. - Yeah.

That's respectable. What was her secret?

Grape-Nuts. And a guy named Duke.