Senior Trip

Whoa, baby.

It's now officially 8:01, people.

Let's move it!

Come on, come on... while we're young!

Herbert Jones, get off my car!

Quickly, quickly, quickly.

Come on. Look lively, people. Come on.

Keep climbing... you won't get a nosebleed.

Button that up, Carla.

Herbert. Early Bird. Worm. Think about it.

Pull, Wanda. Pull.

Total destruction.

Any harm?

I don't think so.

Wait... there's a scratch.

Where, here?

People, um, say that acid

causes, um, brain damage.

But, um...

- What did you say? - Hey, what class do we have now?

Math?

Dude.

There's nobody in here.

Uh... everybody's dead, man. Nuclear annihilation.

D'Agastino and Barry!

It's alive.

It's precisely 8:26 and you two dopers are still roaming the halls.

Why aren't you two at the assembly?

Principal Moss, we've been lookin' everywhere for you.

What are you talking about?

This guy just totally trashed your car.

Not my new Buick?

Yeah.

We tried to chase him and everything, but he got away.

He, um, was wearing a Billy Joel T-shirt.

Get to the auditorium.

Yes.

Look, even though I'm probably going to get into Yale,

doesn't mean that I don't suffer from the effects of teen angst.

But I'm here to tell you

that drugs and alcohol are not the answers to your problem...

Steve... President Dickhead.

Hey... fuck you, man.

Drugs rule!

Thanks for saving me a seat, Lisa.

Shut up!

Hey, man, what time's that suit have to be back?

As student body president, I am proud to bring you

- this special assembly. - Fuck you, Nisser!

So...

without any further ado, I give to you,

direct from Salt Lake City, the music of High On Life.

Hey, there, Fairmount High. We're High On Life.

Sponsored by the wonderful people at Bounty Burger.

Get off, you freak!

Now, I know your teen years can be hard...

Show us your tits!

But just remember, you're not alone.

We all need a little love in our hearts.

Hit it, Jojo.

Go away, you suck!

Lift up your fellow man, lend 'em a helping hand

Put a little love in your heart

They look like Abba.

If you see it's getting late Oh, please don't hesitate

Put a little love in your heart

This sucks.

We have to save the assembly.

Let's do some Van Damme-age.

Will be a better place

And the world

Will be a better place

For you

And me

- AV man. - What?

Hey, guys. What's up?

Virus Man, we have to do something about this lip-syncing shit.

Cool! Whaddya got in mind?

Put a little

Put a little love in your heart

Put a little love...

What is going on here?

Calm down, now.

Let's settle down...

Repent!

Why are you doing this to me?

I only want to help you!

Now, now, now. Calm down. It's gonna be okay.

Let got of me. I've gotta get out of here.

What the hell is going on here?!

Superb assembly, Principal Moss.

A, space.

B, space.

Space.

C, space.

D, space. Space.

Hey! How do you get this thing to work, man?

I say we're due for another Senior Class party.

This computer sucks.

Hey, Reggie.

Pretty cool how we trashed the assembly, huh?

What are you talking about?

Nothing. Nothing.

Um, where are we gonna have it?

How about your step-monster's place, 'kay?

No, no, no. This calls for something with a higher degree of difficulty.

Lisa.

- Lisa, Lisa, Lisa, Lisa. - What?!

You wanna cut and go to a party?

Come on.

I know you like me.

Would you leave me alone?

I am concerned about you, Lisa.

You're gonna wake up one day

and realize that you wasted all of your high school years studying.

And you're gonna wake up and realize you're a loser.

Q...

See you tomorrow, Mr. Bloom.

Go.

Go.

Go.

Don't worry. I'm a professional, I know exactly what I'm doing. Go.

The cars will stop. Go!

Mom!

They never listen to me.

Fools. Never listen to me.

Never, never...

Hey, dude. You know how to get to 237 Stratford Road?

Dude, how about Sterling Ridge Lane?

He doesn't know.

What do you mean, he doesn't know? He's a crossing guard.

Hey, dickhead!

Don't you even know your way around the neighborhood?

- That's it! - Go! Go! Go!

Stop!

- Later, psycho. - Pull over!

Nice job, buddy.

Get a life, loser!

Stop! Stop!

Stop!

I said stop!

Come in.

Yes, Mrs. Winston?

Hello.

Yes?

I forgot why I knocked.

Mrs. Winston, are those cut slips you're holding?

My late husband once wrote a little poem called "Little..."

Yeah, must be another senior skip day.

D'Agastino thinks he can outsmart me.

Not in my domain.

Hey.

What's up?

Cool party, man.

Oh, I have a mission for you.

You want me to torch the principal's house, huh?

Okay. But, uh, first, we need provisions, man.

Oh, okay.

Hey, guys, beer run.

Wouldn't it be cool to screw in the principal's bedroom?

Uh, hold that thought.

Well, what are you doing here?

This is a senior class party, isn't it?

- Yeah. - Well, then I'm in the right place.

What is it, Steve?

Sir, I thought you might want to take a look at this.

I found it on the floor of my science class.

"Dags and Reggie invite you

to total destruction."

"Twelve o'clock. 237 Stratford Road."

That's your house, sir.

I know you. You're that smart girl.

You wanna get high?

No, thank you.

How's it goin', Lisa?

- Are you out of your mind? - What's the matter?

- This is Principal Moss's house. - Don't worry about it.

The party's gonna end at 3:00, we'll clean up, he'll never know.

Miosky! Miosky!

I'm not gettin' busted for this.

Surprise!

Happy birthday.

You think you're so funny, don't you, D'Agastino?

Well, none of your friends are laughing! They know you're the reason

they're spending a Saturday in detention.

It's not my fault.

Well, then who is responsible for the mess in my house?

The school system.

Oh. Oh, oh, oh.

And how is it the school system's fault?

Well, um...

...the whole reason why I threw the party, Principal Moss, is because...

We're fed up.

Yeah. We're adults, you know,

and you just keep bombarding us with your rules.

Stop treating us like kids. We are fully developed human beings.

You teachers are so out of touch.

We don't need this "A, space, J, space,

Put A Little Love In Your Heart shit." We need a challenge.

You guys have to rethink this whole education thing.