Good Will Hunting

Mod fx squared, dx.

So please finish Percival by next time.

I know many of you had this as undergraduates, but it won't hurt to brush up.

Thank you, Steven.

I also put an advanced Fourier system on the main hallway chalkboard.

I'm hoping that one of you might prove it by the end of the semester.

Now the person to do so will not only be in my good graces...

but also go on to fame and fortune...

by having their accomplishment recorded and their name printed...

in the auspicious M.I.T Tech.

Former winners include Nobel laureates, Field's medal winners...

renowned astrophysicists and lowly M.I.T. professors.

That's all. If you have any questions...

I'm sure that Tom has the answers.

Hi, Will.

- Kirsten, how you doing? - I'm all right. How are you?

- Good. - I didn't get on Cathy last night.

- Why not? - I don't know.

- Cathy! - What?

Why didn't you give me none of that nasty little hoochie-woochie you usually throw at me?

Oh, fuck you and your Irish curse, Chuckie.

Like I'd waste my energy spreadin' my legs for that Tootsie Roll dick?

- Go home and give it a tug yourself. - Tootsie Roll!

Toots!

She's missin' a tooth, Will.

She's got skin problems. I don't-

Plus, it's like 5-to-2 Morgan ends up marryin' her, you know what I mean?

There's only so many times you can bang your friend's future wife.

It's wrong. Where you goin'?

I'm gonna take off.

Fuck you, you're takin' off. It's, like, what, 10:00?

No, I'm tired.

Irish curse?

She don't know. There ain't no Irish curse.

Stop brushing me back.

Stop crowding the plate! Which one will it be?

You're gonna get charged, you know that?

You think I'm afraid of you, you big fuck? You're crowdin' the fuckin' plate.

Hey, Casey's bouncin' up a bar at Harvard next week. We should go up there.

- What are we gonna do up there? - I don't know.

We'll fuck up some smart kids. Probably fit right in.

Ow! Fuckin' punk.

- Oh, what's up? You still tough? - Come on!

Come on. Come on. That's it.

I'd hold you forever here

In my arms

- Professor Lambeau? - Yes?

I'm in your applied theories class. We're all up at the math and science building.

Come here. It's Saturday.

- Unless you wanna have a drink with me. - Maybe.

We just couldn't wait until Monday to find out.

- Find out what? - Who proved the theorem.

This is correct. Who did this?

- Jack? - It wasn't me.

- Nemesh? - No way.

- Come on,Joey Mac! - Billy, McNamara's up.

Come on, kid!

- Joey, dig it out! Dig it out! - Another pitch!

Bring it down, Mac! That's how to do it!

Attaboy! Take two, Mac.

Hey, Morgan, who's the girl with the striped pants? She's got a nice ass.

- Yeah, that's a real nice ass. - Who's the guy she's with?

That fuckin' guinea. I hate that little bitch. Will knows him.

Yeah, I do. Yeah, fuckin' Carmine Scarpaglia.

That guy used to beat the shit out of me in kindergarten.

- That guy? - Yeah.

Fuck this. Let's get some food.

- What, Morgan, you're not gonna go talk to her? - Fuck her.

- I could go for a Whopper. - Let's go to Kelly's.

Morgan, I'm not goin' to Kelly's just 'cause you like the take-out girl.

It's 15 minutes out of our way.

What the fuck are we gonna do? We can't spare 15 minutes?

Double burger.

Double burger.

Chuck, I had a double burger.

Would you shut the fuck up? I know what you ordered. I was there.

So give me my fuckin' sandwich.

What do you mean, your sandwich? I bought it.

Morgan, how much money you got on you?

I said I'd get change when I get the snow cone.

I said that when we pulled up. Give me my sandwich and stop bein' a prick.

All right, give me your fuckin' 16 cents that you got on you now.

We'll put your fuckin' sandwich on layaway. Here we go. Keep it right up here for ya.

We'll put you on a program. Every day you come in with your six cents.

At the end of the week, you get your sandwich.

- Are you gonna be an asshole? - What am I, fuckin' sandwich welfare?

I think you should establish a good line of credit.

Like how you bought your couch- payment plans.

Remember how your mother brought in ten dollars every day for a year.

She finally got her couch Rent-A-Center style.

- Can I have my food, please? - Here's your fuckin' double burger.

- Hey, hold up, Chuck. Slow it down. - Who do we got?

- I don't know yet. - Hey, douche bag!

Yeah, you, you skank face!

- Shut the fuck up. - Get outta here.

What are you worried about?

- Come on, Will. - Why don't you lick my love stick?

We seen the guy 15 minutes ago. We should've fight him then.

We're eatin' our snacks now.

- Shut up, Morgan, you're goin'. - I'm not goin'.

So don't go.

- I'm not goin'. - Fuckin' go, Morgan.

Let me tell you. If you're not out there in two fuckin' seconds...

when I'm done with them, you're next.

Carmine, it's me, Will. Remember? We went to kindergarten together.

- Fuckin', let's go, man. - Step on his fuckin' head.

Smash his ass on the ground. Stomp that motherfucker.

- Motherfucker, die! - Hit him harder!

- Harder! - Come on!

Will! Will, cops, Will!

Will, cops. Let's go. Let's go.

Easy, brother, easy.

- Hey, fellas, thanks for comin' out. - Come here!

Fuck.

Is it just my imagination, or has my class grown considerably?

By no stretch of my imagination...

do I believe you've all come here to hear me lecture.

Rather, to ascertain the identity of the mystery math magician.

So without further ado, come forward, silent rogue, and receive thy prize.

I'm sorry to disappoint my spectators, but...

it seems there will be no unmasking here today.

However, my colleagues and I have conferred...

and there is a problem on the board right now...

that took us more than two years to prove.

So let this be said: The gauntlet has been thrown down...

but the faculty have answered and answered with vigor.

- Hey, when's the arraignment? - Next week.

Sorry.

- What are you doing? - Sorry.

That's people's work. You can't graffiti here.

- Don't you walk away from me! - Hey, fuck you!

You're a clever one. What's your name?

Oh, my God.

Looks right.

Will, how retarded do you gotta be to get fired from that job?

How hard is it to push a motherfuckin' broom around?

Bitch, you got fired from pushin' a fuckin' broom.

I got fired 'cause management was restructuring.

Yeah, restructuring the amount of retards they had workin' for 'em.

Shut up. You get canned more than tuna, bitch.

At least I got a motherfuckin' job right now, don't I?

Yeah.

- Why did you get fired, Will? - Management was restructuring.

My uncle could probably get you on a demo team.

- Can he do that? - You kiddin' me?

I asked you yesterday if I could get a job.

- And I told you "no" yesterday. - What's up, Casey?

- What's up, Case? - What's up, Big Case?

Let's sit over here.

This is a Harvard bar, huh?

I thought there'd be equations and shit on the walls.

I will take a pitcher of the finest lager in the house.

Time out. I'm gonna have to bust a little move on them Harvard honeys down the end of the bar.

- Work some magic. - Get some potion for us.

- Oh, hello. - Oh, hello.

- Hi. How are ya? - Fine.

- So, do you ladies- - Come here often?

Do I come here? I come here a bit.

I'm here, you know, from time to time.

- Do you go to school here? - Yep.

- Yeah, that's it. I think I had a class with you. - Oh, yeah. What class?

- History. - Maybe.

Yes, I think that's what it was.

You don't necessarily- may not remember me. I like it here.

It doesn't mean 'cause I go here, I'm a genius. I am smart.

Hey.

- Hey, how's it goin'? How are ya? - Good. How ya doin'?

What class did you say that was?

- History. - Yeah.

Just history? It must have been a survey course then.

- Yeah, it was. It was surveys. - Right.

You should check it out. It's a good course. It'd be a good class.

- How'd you like that course? - You know, frankly...

- I found that class rather elementary. - Elementary.

- I don't doubt that it was. - Yeah.

I remember that class.

It was just between recess and lunch.

Clark, why don't you go away?

- Why don't you relax? - Why don't you go away?

- I'm just havin' fun with my new friend. - Are we gonna have a problem?

No, no, no. There's no problem here.

I was just hoping you might give me some insight into the evolution...

of the market economy in the southern colonies.

My contention is that prior to the Revolutionary War, the economic modalities-

especially in the southern colonies-

could most aptly be characterized as...

- agrarian precapitalist. - Let me tell you somethin'.

Of course that's your contention. You're a first-year grad student.

You just got finished readin' some Marxian historian- Pete Garrison, probably-

You're gonna be convinced of that till next month when you get to James Lemon.

Then you're gonna be talkin' about how the economies of Virginia and Pennsylvania...

were entrepreneurial and capitalist way back in 1740.

That's gonna last until next year. You're gonna be regurgitatin' Gordon Wood...

talkin' about, you know, the prerevolutionary utopia...

and the capital-forming effects of military mobilization.

As a matter of fact, I won't, because Wood drastically underestimates the impact of-

Wood drastically underestimates the impact of social distinctions...

predicated upon wealth, especially inherited wealth?

You got that from Vickers' Work in Essex County, Page 98, right?

I read that too. Were you gonna plagiarize the whole thing for us?