Wrong Turn

Oldies 99.2

KIOU

Well, the weekend forecast looking good for the area.

Sunny skies on tap from Brentwood all the way north to Richmond

and throughout the state of Virginia, with highs reaching 85 degrees.

Low tonight, about 65.

Should be a great weekend for hikers to get out and enjoy...

Pretty girl.

You must be one proud papa.

Who's the Black fella?

Darius Clemmons. It's her boyfriend.

They were traveling with a group of their friends.

Well, the Appalachian Trail's a hefty piece of real estate.

I mean, Maine clear down to Georgia way.

I've been tracking their route,

and she promised to call or text every week.

And it's been 6 weeks.

The last place that she texted me was here in your town.

Well, the fact is we get a shit-ton of kids that come through here.

I mean, they come, and they do whatever it is they do, and they move on.

My boy's down in Tampa playing keyboard in some rockabilly band.

I can't remember the last time that boy picked up a phone.

My daughter's not like that.

Well, we can make it official if you'd like.

Fill out this missing persons report.

Be as detailed as you'd like.

But if I were to put money on it,

I'd say she's somewhere sunning herself in the Keys.

Guest checkout is automatic. I rarely see them leave.

Most are gone by sun up, trying to catch flights or beat traffic.

And there was nothing left in the room?

No. And their car was gone.

Okay, well,

if you think of anything, please give me a call, yeah?

My name's Scott.

You spoke to the police chief?

Yeah.

I didn't sense much urgency from him.

This is a quiet town.

The quieter it is, the more he gets to fish.

Hey, it's Jen.

Leave a message, and I'll hit you back. Thanks, bye.

Look again. Please.

No, sorry, no.

You know how many tourists come through here?

I remember drinks, not faces.

Lose something?

My daughter.

Her name is Jennifer.

She passed through here with 5 of her friends.

They're all about the same age.

Yeah, I seen 'em.

Goddamn yuppies.

You didn't happen to notice which way they went?

North, maybe.

Up on the AT.

But if they got lost in them woods, you might as well just go on home,

'cause you ain't never gonna find 'em.

Yeah, well...

I don't believe that. I can't.

Believe what you want, mister. But know this...

Out there,

nature eats everything it catches right down to the bone.

Doesn't give a shit if it's a cute girl.

Do you have kids?

What would you do?

What do you think of this one?

Yeah, it's-it's fine.

- Adam, come on. - What? What the fuck?

- I need that. - I want to show you the picture.

- Give me my phone. - No!

Hey. Babe, you're fine.

Just breathe.

Open your mind.

Enjoy it, okay?

- Look at that one. - Is that how sad I look all the time?

Yes, you do, actually.

I must really love you.

You really do. It's-it's weird how much you love...

You're weird.

Now kiss me.

- Whoa! - Ah!

You know, uh, you're making me look bad.

- Sorry. - Don't be. Fucking girl power.

Girl power.

Dude, where'd you learn how to do this?

My dad.

He taught me two things:

How to bait a hook and how to change a tire.

My dad taught me how to put in a tampon.

Single parent.

His eyes were closed the whole time.

Not a good experience.

Uh...

Oh.

- Oh, here we go. - Sweet.

Jen, Jen, Jen.

My fucking hero.

It's quaint.

Yeah, especially if you miss the good old days of the Confederacy.

All right.

This one's mine.

- That's yours, babe. - Trying to grab yours.

Pass me mine.

- 3 rooms for 2 nights. - Yes.

Policies of the inn are posted in your rooms.

No alcohol on the patio.

No candles in the room, no loud music or raucous activity.

Hear that, boys? Behave yourselves.

Thanks. And don't worry. I'll keep them on a short leash.

Have you been here before?

First time. Just doing a little hiking.

Piece of advice, keep to the marked trail.

The land here can be unforgiving.

Thanks. We'll be careful.

You know that a bunch of abolitionists came from this town?

Darius loves that shit. Fucking history, baby.

Back when people actually fought for what they believed in.

Listen, by the way, what was that... what was that thing earlier?

Why wouldn't you hold my hand?

Nothing. No reason.

Oh, there's a reason.

Same reason Darius is on edge.

- Adam. - Dude.

What? He's a Black dude with a White girlfriend

in bum-fuck Virginia.

Hey.

Y'all ain't from around here, are you?

What gave us away?

Uh, yeah.

We're just, uh, checking out the Appalachian Trail.

Couple days of hiking. Nothing extreme.

There's something dangerous up there.

So if you got any questions or you need a guide,

me and my pals over here, we, uh, we know this land

like the back of our hands.

Thanks. Thanks. I think we're good.

It's your life.

But, uh, if you change your mind...

we'll always be around.

Driving around in a shitty pickup, sipping moonshine, am I right?

Stop it.

What'd you say, peckerwood?

Excuse my fiancé.

He forgets that talking to people isn't like commenting on Reddit.

Don't look at me, boy.

You goddamn hipster freaks are the problem with this whole world.

I'm betting not a goddamn one of you

ever worked a real fucking job in your life.

So you better sit the fuck still and behave yourself.

You're wrong.

Jen.

My boyfriend, Darius, runs a sustainable energy nonprofit.

Milla's an oncologist. Adam's an app developer.

And Gary and Luis own a pair of New York bistros.

I don't know. I'd call those real jobs.

And what about you, sweetheart?

I have two master's.

Art history and dance.

Which means I make coffee for a living.

But right now I'm looking at you,

and I'm seeing some yellowing in your eyes.

Which means what, Milla? Hmm?

Oh, um, it could be liver problems.

Jaundice, hepatitis, Gilbert syndrome.

You should probably see a doctor, actually.

All right, well...

you kids be safe.

Maybe we'll see you again.

Seriously, do not do that ever again.

- I can't handle that. - Dude, why do we let you drink?

Because usually I'm very funny.

No, actually, you have never, ever been funny.

Like, never.

Where are the drinks?

You know this song.

Do you know this?

No, but it's a good song.

Okay, people, 8:00 a.m.

Luis, Gary, I'm talking to you.

Okay, I'm not a morning person.

If I don't get my 8 hours, I will be a zombie.

- Be a zombie who hikes. - Hey, guys.

- Guys. - What?

Who's that by the car?

Is that one of those assholes from the bar?

Yeah, probably.

- Hey. - Adam.

- Relax. - Hey!

Get away from the car, man.

Get away from there. Shoo.

- He's not a dog. - Yo!

Are you deaf or something? Back the fuck off!

Jesus, Adam, are you trying to piss off everyone in Middle America?

You gotta be tough with these people.

Okay, big guy, time for bed.

- Come on. - Back me up here.

Adam.

Come on, forget about it.

Where the hell did that guy go?