Garfield: His 9 Lives

I feel like creating cat today.

Gimme a cat.

Give it four legs, some fur. Fangs!

And some surprises.

It's eyes should shine in the dark

and it should always land on its feet.

Oh sure...

Give cat six eyes.

Eh, we only have two eyes left.

Two eyes.

I like that.

Cranium: 23 pantenes.

Jaws: 12 photons.

No eyebrows.

Nice.

Huh, notice how the heavy lids give it an arrogant yet warm expression.

Nice job staff.

You designed the perfect animal. Cat.

However there is one finishing touch.

Give it nine lives.

What?

I don't understand.

Why 9?

Nine?

But everyone else gets one life.

Well let just say it would make a great plot for a story, OK.

Subtitles By: Mighty Mike 7 7 0 2 0

In my first life I formulated many of my likes and dislikes.

I dislike my rock bed.

On the other hand,

you wouldn't believe the size of the pteranodon drumsticks.

About ten million years ago

the first cat crawled out of the sea.

His first word was...

Uuaahh.

He had been holding his breath for quite some time.

In those days the first everything was crawling up out of the sea.

The first snake.

The first chicken.

Crabgrass.

The first real estate salesman.

And then came the first girl cat.

Woman!

C'mere.

C'mere.

Woman!

Cat!

"Cat" was caveman talk for darn it!

It wasn't long before cave cat learned to talk.

Foom.

Foom?

Foom.

Ah, no no.

Meow.

Meow!

Meow.

Me-ow.

Meow.

Meow.

Caveman soon domesticated cave cat.

Mrrroww

mrrroww.

Good cat, good cat.

Soon cave cat learned to live with his human counterpart

and spent his time pretty much as cats do now.

Ahem, except for the fire breathing mice.

Ah, yes, those were simple times.

Times when people had to entertain themselves.

Big Bob come!

Who big Bob.

Big Bob big.

Ugh.

Big Bob bad.

Ugh.

Big Bob go whoomp, whoomp, whoomp.

Fear big Bob.

Big Bob.

Hence cats instinctive fear of dogs.

Big Bob slobbered

and ran away.

Cave cat gave big Bob a piece of his mind.

Aha, big Bob!

Cave cat go whoomp, whoomp, whoomp.

Ooh, stay away big Bob

or cave cat go whoomp, whoomp, whoomp.

Alas big Bob returned with the worlds first and last crab tree.

He wanted to play fetch.

Thus, the worlds first and last cave cat

bought the farm, for failing to field the fetched crab tree.

2,000 BC. Was a good year to be a cat in Egypt.

We were revered, even worshiped.

Ah, for the good old days.

Ancient Egypt wasn't the arid wasteland you might expect.

Naw, it was bustling with activity in 2,000 BC.

The pyramids were still under construction.

In those days we cats were venerated

and worshiped because of the cat goddess Bastet.

She was the head of the hierarchy of animal gods.

This was one Egyptian belief that certainly got no argument from us cats.

Me, I was known as king cat.

I was the favorite cat of King Amenhotep the 3rd

I called him junior.

Those were happy days

I had my own personal bevy of slave dogs.

And for fun I would go over to the pyramids and torture the construction workers.

To the pyramids you mutts, lets get a move on.

It doesn't get any better than this.

Stay.

Did I ever tell you I love it when you grovel?

Okay, okay, enough adoration. Back to work!

Whoomp whoomp boring.

Whoomp whoomp boring.

Whoomp whoomp boring.

You know guys...

What if we built a cube instead of a pyramid?

- Cube?!? - What? - No!

OK, OK. Big babies.

Whoomp whoomp boring.

Whoomp whoomp boring.

Whoomp whoomp boring.

Whoomp whoomp boring.

Whoomp whoomp boring.

Alright you back to work.

We got a deadline to meet you know.

I want these pyramids built by Thursday.

Hay, have a heart mate I'm doing the best I can.

If you know whats good for you, you'll get your shoulder back to the stone.

Yeah, I'd like to get your shoulder back to the stone.

What was that!

I-I-I just said.

If you know whats good for you.

You'd be back at the temple rather than here picking on us poor slaves.

And just what is that suppose to mean?

Read the glyphs mate, writings on the wall.

I don't like the looks of this.

That's right mate.

When the king croaks, he takes all his worldly possessions with him.

And you are a possession.

Get the picture?

I got the picture all to clearly.

Old Jr's. is not even bright enough to come in out of a sandstorm.

And then to complicate the situation his evil brother prince Black Bart

has had his eyes on the throne for some time now.

Ooh, if my lifespan is to coincide with Jr's.

I'd better get back there and protect him from Bart.

Giddy-up, you doggies! Time's wastin'!

Hay, Junior.

Hay man, you know, I have a surprise for you.

Ooh, goody goody goody. I just love surprises.

Where is it. Where is it?

It's ah, through that door.

Go ahead step through the door

I think your going to be surprised.

Okay.

Mush! Mush!

Aw, shucks

I don't see any surprise around here.

Ooh, sometimes that Black Bart makes me so mad!

Rats!

Hay, you shoved me.

I like to do more than shove ya'!

I'd like to...

Huh?

I wonder what this is?

Oh well, whatever it is, it probably hasn't been invented yet.

Then again, what do I know?

All dressed up and no place to go, huh Jr.?

What am I laughing about? I should be conserving oxygen.

These crypts are air tight.

I only have enough air to last about...

Let see this crypt is about

80 by 40

let see a 20 foot ceiling.

Ta ta da ta da ta da

I'll run out of air in ruffly 73 years.

Slave dog!

Boy am I glade to see you.

I'll see to it theirs a little something extra in your next pay check.

I owe you one ol' buddy.

If theirs anything I can ever do for you just let me know.

You know slave dog,

its friends like you that keep this tired old world going round.

Be a good dog and run over to the pyramids to see how things are going.

Yes sir. Right away sir.

Anything you wish sir.

Your wish is my command sir.

I'd like to meet you in a dark alley sometime sir.

Arf.

My third life was my favorite.

My body grew old but I never, never, never, grew up.

Yellow and orange skies filled with magic butterfly's

made the morning a memory.

These were the mornings Chloe and the orange kitten

liked best.

It seemed like it was always summer in the garden.