GCB

Mama, it's me. My shift ran late...

But, uh, I'll be there soon.

A bee. No, no.

No. No. No. No!

Aah!

Okay. I'm a worker bee, too.

I won't hurt you if you don't hurt me.

Ohh!

Oh, my... oh... oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Oh, God.

Ohh. Are you okay?

Step back. I don't want you to freak.

Oh, my God. Are you bleeding? How bad is it? You're hurt.

You're... oh! You're naked.

I warned you.

You're driving naked.

Well... (Sighs) Well, it's not against the law.

- I had my seat belt on. - Oh!

Sorry. I'm still trying to wrap my head

around the fact that you drive naked.

Clearly, I made a big impression.

Look, it's not a habit.

I just spilled excruciatingly hot coffee

in my lap earlier, so I was drying my clothes,

so you're not my first accident today,

but you are the prettiest.

I gotta go.

Wait. I don't have your information.

Don't need it. You hit me.

If it's anything major, I'll contact you.

Amanda Vaughn. Santa Barbara. California license 3215260.

How did you do that?

I'm amazing... (Gasps) And I'm late.

I'd really feel more comfortable if I knew your name...

And how to get in touch with you!

Hey!

You... you dropped your pants!

Uncle Burl, I just can't believe it.

Aunt Bitsy was so vital, so full of life.

She's just... (Voice breaks) gone too soon.

I just don't think I could feel worse.

Burl, Carlene, Ripp,

I just don't even know what to say.

I just feel so awful.

Sure you do, you poor thing.

I can't even imagine what it must be like

to have someone die in your home while eating your food.

Carlene ate the very same ribs.

But for the grace of God,

that could have been her who choked.

Yes.

That crossed my mind.

Sorry. Late. Car wreck.

Calm down. It's nothing. Relax. Just grieve. (Sighs)

Your mom is amazing.

She doesn't even sound like a white woman.

Awesome, right?

- Where's Blake? - Daddy's up at the ranch.

He finally found a new foreman, so he's showing him the ropes.

Where's miss Sharon?

I do think... (Cricket sustains note)

The blue stole looks better

with your eyes

and your hair

and your skin tone.

I'm just trying to make sure you're pulpit-ready.

Am I doing a good job?

Yes, but, uh, blue is for advent, Sharon.

White is for mourning.

Uh, do you have my meditation?

Oh, yeah.

I put it on prettier paper.

Shh, shh. (Mouths words)

I'm having so much fun learning how to type.

Uh, baptism? Th-this is for baptism, Sharon.

Well, I'll just retype it. It'll just be a sec.

I'm up to 12 words a minute.

Sharon, go, uh, go sit with your family,

uh, and be with 'em in this time of loss.

Oh, they're fine. They've never met the woman.

Okay, uh... thank you. Thank you.

What about your meditation?

I'll have to wing it.

Carlene, I am so sorry. It's such a tragedy.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Thank you, both of you.

Ripp, you remember Andrew Remington.

Yeah, you're the fellow that, uh, yanked

our "Condos for Christ" project out from under us. Welcome.

"Yank's" a little harsh.

So when is your company moving to town?

Well, 30 of our V.P.s are already here.

Uh, Heather's been findin' em homes...

And gettin' 'em all set up.

She's just been so amazing.

Bravo, Heather.

- Mm-hmm. - Making all that commission

from your relationship with sweet, adorable Andrew.

You're just a busy little beaver.

I mean, she's so socially connected.

Who knew our little Heather would grow up

and be, like, the most powerful woman in Dallas?

Mm.

Well... (Chuckles) I'm no Heather,

but I do own fitness centers, TV stations, hotels,

clothing companies, restaurants.

Good golly, we'll be here all day. (Chuckles)

Blake and I just love welcoming movers and shakers to town.

Hey, kitten, why don't we throw a boar hunt out at the ranch

for Andrew and his posse?

Ohh. Family-oriented.

Nothing quite says "welcome to Texas"

like a good, clean kill shot, huh?

Uh, Ripp... (Chuckles) Carlene,

actually I was thinking about hosting something.

I mean, after all, Andrew is... with me.

And where would the most powerful woman

in Dallas do that, at your... your condo?

I think your building does have that common area

next to... I think that wet thing is a pool.

Yeah.

Uh, you wouldn't need caterers,

what with all those lovely vending machines.

I've got it.

We can invite your people to our church fund-raiser.

Well, the food is good. Uh... (Chuckles)

The entertainment is spectacular.

Thank you. (Chuckles)

We'll smother 'em with Christian fellowship.

They're not all christians.

Not yet.

How you holding up?

All this time. (Sniffles)

What was I thinkin'?

Thinkin' about what, darlin'?

Mm.

Mnh! Mm.

Burl Lourd.

Ohh. Oh, no, no, no, no.

"No, no, no" is right. That is your wife's funeral out there.

Oh, heaven forgive me.

Well, I may, but she won't. When you join her in paradise,

she's gonna have your gumballs in her grips for eternity!

Gigi, I...

I-I'm not myself.

That's no excuse.

Folks will be wondering where you are.

Pull it together!

Amanda, Amanda, Amanda.

It's so important to me to have you here.

Boy, do I know how much it means

to have support at times like these.

We tend to forget how fragile life is.

Howdy.

Now why are you wearing a choir robe?

Uh, I lost my pants.

- What? - I have your pants.

Nice.

Wait. Just a darn minute.

Why do you have my little brother's pants?

Brother?

GCB 1x05 - Forbidden Fruit Original air date April 1, 2012

Luke Lourd. I didn't even remember Carlene having

a little brother. We never met, did we?

Sorta.

Yeah, I was there when you dumped mud on her

to make her a javelina in high school.

I laughed my ass off.

I was so awful. I'm not anymore, trust me.

You seem...

So different from Carlene,

- so... - Nice? Yeah.

Well, you see, the difference between me and my sister...

she is a judgmental piece of work.

I'm just a piece of work.

Well, gotta go bury aunt Bitsy. You wanna come?

I'm good.

Hook shot.

Zack! We're supposed to be helping.

Did you fold the chairs at fellowship hall?