Kidnapping Mr. Heineken

So you've decided to make your own luck.

I can understand that.

I made Heineken into a world class brand.

Me. On my own.

It's worth billions now.

I did that.

And not by sitting on my ass either

waiting for the stupid money fairy

to hit me on my stupid damned head.

You know that what you're doing is completely stupid.

Unless, of course, you pull it off,

in which case it can be completely brilliant.

Yeah. I suppose if I were in your shoes,

I would do exactly the same.

Ah, there he is.

What are you doing? Huh?

What are you doing?

You can't bring a kid to this.

He can wait outside with Brakes.

This is fucked up.

Listen, it's not fucked. It's fine.

Cat, can you put the kid down, please?

Just give him to my little brother.

Right. Now, is everyone ready? Yes.

- Is everyone ready? - Yeah!

Alright, let's do this.

Well, it's a pleasure

to finally meet you, Mr. Iverson.

My name is Cor Van Hout.

This is Mr. Holleeder, Mr. Boellard, and Mr. Meijer.

We're here today in the hope

of asking you for a loan.

- A loan? - Yeah.

It's a business loan.

And what particular sort of--? Construction.

Yeah, we were doing well.

Yeah, really well.

You've been running a company employing a hundred men?

Yeah, well, we were all equal partners,

yeah, right down the middle there.

Um, Mr. Boellard here is a master carpenter.

Mr. Meijer has a--

If these numbers are real,

you're in fine shape.

Surely, if you've been making this kind of money,

you must have investments

that you could stake as collateral?

Uh, well, we had, uh,

you know, cars, and we had boats

and we had some race horses but--

Equities, bonds, pension funds?

When the recession hit, we cashed in.

The cars, the boats, the horses?

It's for paychecks, uh,

for guys living from one Friday to the next.

I think you can understand

that their kids can't live or eat off IOUs.

I think, maybe, what you haven't heard,

Mr. Big Manager, is that, uh,

there's a world of hurt out there right now--

Oh, believe me, I know.

Well, we still got a building.

Great. What's the address?

Uh, it's Leidsegracht.

Six six three.

Hold on. Leidsegracht?

The commune?

Commune? It's a bunch of punks that don't pay their rent.

It's hardly a fucking commune.

Yes. Squatters.

We're in the process of evictions.

Government says once they change the locks,

they've got rights. So that means lawyers.

I do see your problem.

But you're welcome back when you solve it.

Guys like him

don't lend money to guys like us.

We'll get the punks out of the building.

Yeah. How are you going to do that?

Yeah. I got an idea.

Alright, listen. You're going to love this.

It's time to go, boys!

Hey, what's going on?

Time to go!

Open up!

Cat, get in through a window, not the front door!

Open up!

Come on down!

You don't scare me! You fucking stink!

Whoa!

I'll come back for you.

Get the fuck out!

Coming!

Fucking coming!

- Oh, shit! - Get out of here!

Shit.

Oh, shit! Oh!

Get the fuck out of here.

Oh, shit.

You going to go?

Go and get the fuck out of here!

- Get the fuck out! - Go on!

Now you're in trouble!

Go! Go! Everyone out!

Go, go, go!

Hey, this is our building!

We own this place!

Fuckface!

Police! Police!

Everybody go!

You want to do this?

No. No, I think I'll pass.

Pussy.

Hey! Whoaaa!

Charge!

Get your fucking hands off of me now.

I hope--well, fuck it. Yeah, yeah. Okay.

Fine. Thank you. Bye.

What'd he say?

Well, he said if we lived in Texas,

they'd throw us a parade.

But here, well you know how that is.

Yeah. Anyway, good news.

Squatters aren't going to press charges.

How kind is that? Whooptiedoo.

- Happy days. - Cornelius Van Hout.

Yo.

Thank you.

- Only Van Hout. - Huh?

Hey.

Bad news. You guys resisted arrest.

Plus, not only do they get to stay in the building,

we got to pay for the shit we busted.

Yeah, including the fish!

Fuck the fish.

Sonja?

Hey.

Uh-oh.

No, no, no. Listen. I can explain.

I--Sonja, please, will--Son--!

Sonja, what are you doing?

You alright?

What's going on, Son?

What are you doing?

What are you doing hiding in my kitchen?

Hey, who are you?

Who are you, huh?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know who you are.

I just worked it out.

Yeah, that's right. You know what?

You are way too good-looking to be Karin's boy. Hm?

Oh, hey, Karin, hey.

Hey, how you doing? I was just joking--

If you had any idea what's been going on with Sonja,

then you wouldn't do as you do.

What do you mean "going on"?

Sonja, please, wh-- what's going on?

I'm pregnant.

Ah. Ah. What?

Ha. Wow.

That's, uh--

Really? That's unbelievable.

You're fucking pregnant? Yeah.

I'll leave you two to it then. Bye!

See you, Karin! Hey, come on, you!

Happy New Year!

Hey! Hey, Ma!

Look at your hair and your dress,

you look like a model. Thanks.

Hey, be careful!

Yeah, your sister's knocked up.

Yeah, I know It's great.

He doesn't greet his old man--

or even have a beer with him.

You know I don't drink.

Especially Heineken. Look at me when you talk to me.

Heineken beer and Heineken money

paid for this house and for your upbringing.

You see that?

The man is my friend.

But he fired you and I don't think he remembers your name.

You owe him respect.

- Okay, let's go. - Oh!

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Bye, honey. Happy New Year. Bye, Mom. Bye.

Bye. Take care of her. Thank you. Alright. Thank you.

Invite him round next time, Pa.

We'll all kiss his ring.

Well, that was festive.

Oh, come on. Let's have some fun.

Let's go to Karin's.

Aw, come on, Sonja.

You know what we got to do.

Hey? Come on.

I'll look after him. Come on.

Come on. It's tradition, alright?

Yeah, go. You don't mind?

No! No?

Alright, I love you. Love you, too.

Go! Have fun!