Resident Alien

Previously on "resident alien."

I adopted the alien tracker's son, Robert.

Son!

It's the greys.

They're planning on taking over the earth.

I have devised a plan of my own.

I am building a bomb that can destroy the greys' spaceship.

You hit him going 50 miles per hour, and now he's gone.

Joseph is an alien.

They are going to take me again.

And when they do, I'm going to fight.

And I'm not going to stop until we get our baby back.

Where is my son?

What... what are you doing here?

We came to blow up the ship.

What kind of alien was in that jail cell, anyway?

It's a mantid. They're shapeshifters.

Holy shit. They took my baby.

there she is.

- -

Bridget and I have to find that bomb.

I will find D'arcy too. I promise.

- Harry! - You have to get to safety.

There's nothing down there for me.

My father's gone. Go.

- You're holding a baby. - Long story.

At least we made it off the ship.

- Except it's not a ship. - Oh, my god.

Max has something to say to you.

This is some bullshit!

asta's friend.

Red? What's her name?

Uh, Marcy!

Dar... By.

Dar... uh...

Darby.

Darby!

darby.

Harry.

pizza joe?

What are you doing on a grey alien spaceship?

I've been abducted by aliens. You have to get me out of here.

I also have this pizza and no one to give it to.

How do I know that you are not.

That shape-shifting mantid alien.

Tricking me into thinking that you are my regular pizza guy?

I am a man of my word.

I also have a coupon for you for half off your next pizza.

Son of a bitch.

There's a 30% chance that he's lying,

But I think it's worth it.

Be quiet, Bridget. I said I think it's worth it.

- Thank you for saving me. - Uh-huh.

where's the pizza?

No!

You are a...

You are a...

you're a dickhead.

Could you hurry up with that drawing?

I need fresh wall art for my cell!

I will take my time, thanks.

And if you don't like it, you shouldn't have.

Let that mantid trick you into that cell.

It is not my fault!

The fake pizza that the mantid had was pepperoni.

It does not matter.

The mantid thinks he can take over my life in patience.

Ha, ha, ha.

There's only one harry vanderspeigle.

No one will believe that the mantid is really me.

Hi, dr. Vanderspeigle.

Morning, dr. V.

You know, those things can kill you.

Oh, I'm so scared.

Oh, there's dr. Vanderspeigle.

Hey. - Hi, harry.

What?

You, uh, looking forward.

To our therapy session later today?

I'd rather eat a human head.

- Hmm. -

Both: Oh.

Jokester.

Oh, god!

Oh.

Decide to come to work today?

Decide to wash your hair today?

Be nice.

Ms. Lofgren's inside waiting for you.

She's in for her mammogram.

Must be titty Tuesday.

- Harry. -

Isn't it Thursday?

Yeah, it's Thursday.

In prison, your world is very small.

It is made difficult by how little you have,

And worse by what you do not have at all.

Prison is a concept that many beings.

In the universe do not bother with.

If you do not want someone in your way, you just kill them.

There is kindness in murder.

Forgetting something?

Oh, yeah.

I should not have to pay you for this.

You should want to decorate the prison cell.

Of your father and your brother.

You're not my father.

And that little thing is not my brother.

Do not disrespect Bridget!

He is the reason you have that food.

My little baby is the boss of the prison yard economy.

My sweet baby has gotten so hard.

Did you know he has a bitch named Maurice?

Proud you must be.

I am proud of my baby.

But it is not enough. I miss my life.

I miss my friend.

oh, shit.

- Mm? - You slept over.

You weren't supposed to sleep over.

D'arcy is out there.

Hey.

Good morning.

- Oh, hey there. -

Aren't you supposed to be at work?

I overslept.

What time is it? God, it's late.

Uh, I, uh... I was up all night.

Ah.

Looking at some medical files.

But I can't tell you what because...

Hipaa.

You know, the health insurance.

Portability and accountability act.

It's really important, you know?

Are you heading out soon?

You know the cia has.

Six different markers on how to detect a liar?

I'm actually proficient in all six,

But I don't need any of them because you have hook-up hair.

Hey.

I like her hooker hair.

- Wow. - Oh, god.

Ken doll jump scare. Ok.

I'm going to need you to put your clothes on.

And I thought you were done with all this.

Ok, well, I had a big glass of wine,

And he has a cute, dumb face.

I'll just show myself out.

oh, oh.

Aw.

The cutest of the cutest ones is here.

Who slept through the night?

I did.

Cool. Keep moving.

Ok, it's nice that she's comfortable here,

But you know, it... it might not be the best thing.

Well, yeah.

She should be with ben and Kate.

You know you can't do that.

Yeah, with Kate being abducted,