The Gendarme of St. Tropez (Le Gendarme De Saint-Tropez)

Do you recognize the victim? - It jumped into my hand.

What was that hand doing in a private pond, without a licence?

And it's not even the fishing season. - That's not a felony, is it?

How much does it say there? - Thirteen.

Twelve. - Very good.

And what does it say here?

When fishing for trout, the fish should have a minimum length of...

Continue. - 22 centimetres.

Subtract the length of your fish from 22. What do you get?

22 minus 12. Well? - Ten.

So ten days in jail. And shut up.

Daddy, jail is full. - True.

I'll come by again later.

With a wife like that, I'd have something better to do than poach.

Daddy, we have to go to the choir.

I'm a solo performer in the choir.

I pity your daughter with a father like that.

Go ahead, I'll be there.

Not in the house of the Lord, my son.

Come back. You can't just walk away.

Ludovic, a letter for you. Express delivery.

I'll get him, just wait.

Nothing bad, I hope? - I'm transferred to the Var.

With an extra stripe.

Sergeant First Class. Thank you Lord, thank you.

I'm going to show them there.

Lucien, I think I see one with stripes.

You're right, Albert. Let's have a look.

Look, daddy, all those boats. Beautiful. I'm so happy.

Control yourself. My men.

Hello chief. Everything ok? - Congratulations on your daughter.

What's this supposed to mean? Attention.

We're good buddies from the start, right? We'll do this together, won't we?

Fix that button. And you...

Always look me in the eye. Always that frivolous with the kepi?

Attention. Always in the eyes, you hear?

Introduce yourselves.

I don't hear you.

Still not. What's your name? - Fougasse.

Doesn't surprise me. I'm your chief, Cruchot.

My daughter, Nicole. Enough. Take the luggage and go on.

You won't be popular like this. - Order is never popular. Attention.

One, two. one, two. One, two... Faster.

Tourists, guys.

Those clothes will attract snow, girl.

Your pastis is waiting. - We're on duty.

Aren't you thirsty when you're on duty?

What are you doing to those boys? They're shy as it is.

Wait a moment.

Pastis for you? - No, I'm doing my first rounds.

Where are your regulations about prevention of public drunkenness?

We just did a paint job. - Your name?

It's going to be hard work, Lucien.

The holidays are over, Albert.

Fresh fish... - You're not allowed to sell here.

Get out of the sun, you.

Go or you're in trouble.

Are we sticking to the book now?

Here, take it. Caught this morning. Happy now?

Fish. Fish. Fresh...

Do you know what it's called what you just did?

Bribing a civil servant. Name? - Toinette.

Stop. Sergeant First Class Cruchot.

My daughter Nicole.

You already know Merlot and Fougasse. This is Tricard and Berlicot.

Attention.

I'm looking forward to a good collaboration.

The gendarmerie is like a sheepdog for the country.

Often bark, sometimes bite and scare.

You're the leaves, I'm the stem. Together we provide the harvest.

That's all. Agreed, sergeant? - Sure.

I hope you'll get used to this place.

Sergeant, I have a present for you.

You shouldn't have. - To celebrate my arrival.

My credentials, so to speak.

Nine fines already. You're not mucking around.

Time is money. - The mayor's car.

Smack on the crossing. - He was absent minded. I'll take care of it.

Attention. You're very diligent. A bit too diligent.

Don't forget I'm your superior. Attention. And keep quiet.

Come look at your rooms. The ladies are with your daughter already.

Attention. As you see, we're one big family.

Ladies, this is Mr Cruchot. Mrs Merlot, Berlicot and Tricard.

Fougasse is single. And my mother in law and my wife.

Nice to meet you Mrs... - Mrs Gerber.

Or Cécilia, if you like.

Mrs Gerber will do. - Time to change your shirt.

Of course, Cécilia, darling.

You have a beautiful wife.

A brave wife, I often hear. - I thought as much.

Cruchot, we need a man like you here. You don't give up.

There's a lot to be done here. I'll explain everything tomorrow.

Wait. Wait.

Oh no. - That's going too far.

Very good, sergeant.

Enough, enough.

You're not playing anymore.

Excuse me, sergeant.

But where?

Enough. Attention. Look at me, both of you.

I can handle a lot, but I'll get you for this. Attention.

Bravo, sergeant. Very well done.

Shall I open it?

Here, Merlot. Open it.

Don't be so squeamish. - How long is it going to take, Cruchot?

It's coming. Hurry.

Look, sergeant. This will be a treat.

There's not much in there. - He opened it.

Look, chief, a starfish.

Look at that.

Look, sergeant. What a beautiful specimen. Look at that.

Open it.

Unbelievable. Another starfish. That makes two.

Hurry up now.

Was that the owner of the boat who just left?

No, he rents the boat. An American.

He must have found oil in his backyard.

Want to come on board? The sailor's a friend of mine.

No, thanks. Nice of you, though.

Give it back. You're such a pain. My sun block.

Give it, Eddie, or I'll get angry. My bra.

Letters... - Jessica, how could you.

It's mine. Mine. Creeps, that's mine.

Where do you buy your clothes? - She'll start to cry soon.

Leave the dork alone. - Nice, but still green.

Are you coming?

What's a dork?

An unattractive girl.

Don't worry, in nice clothes, you're not so bad.

What's that? - A sunstroke.

That's not possible. Do you see it too, sergeant?

Very clearly.

What are you doing? Get lost. Go inside.

What are you doing in those trashy clothes?

What's wrong with them? - Look at yourself. You're almost bursting out.

Everybody's dressed like this.

You've got your uniform, but I get laughed at.

Who dares to laugh at you?

Boys, girls, everybody. I'm not fashionable.

Do you have to wear clothes like this to be accepted?

I just want to be like the rest.

You're not like the rest. You're my daughter.

So this doesn't suit me?

It suits you too well. Come, go put on something else.

Don't you have anything less... You don't know what I mean?

I really took everything out.

No. Don't you have anything less conspicuous?

These colours go with the sun.

Your sun. As if it's your sun. Take that dress off.

Daddy, what about this? - Cute, no? Looks very cute.

But Mrs Vachon...

That's a great dress.

I'm rich and beautiful. Do you want to marry me?

She doesn't have any complexes.

Must have escaped from a convent. Argument with Mother Superior.

Stop, I love her.

You're a pervert. - No, I'm romantic.

It's not going anywhere with Juliette. - My name is Nicole.

Look, she can talk.

Do you have any plans for later, sweetheart?

Sleep in the tent with mommy and daddy. - Social holiday.

I live on my father's yacht. He's a billionaire.

Sorry, but I don't hang out with just anybody.

Excuse me, princess. - What a blunder.

What are the names of your daddy and the yacht?

Come on, tell us. - My yacht is the Olnico, behind you.

My father's name is Archibald Ferguson. Bud for his friends.

And this is the latest Hawaii fashion...

for me, it's nothing special.

You don't get to see much of the world, do you?

Do you know that Ferguson?

No, but considering the boat and the girl, I'm on my way to Hawaii.

The little girl will get far.

If our old seamstress were still alive... - She'd die now.

Sergeant, it's happening again in Tahiti.

What? The crowds? - No, the nudists. All naked.

We even got a complaint from... - From whom?

We have to act right away. - It's not easy, though.

Shall I go? - No, I'll get them.

They've been provoking me for too long. Assemble.

Careful.

Do we take off our uniforms? - No, then we can't make an arrest.

Attention. Ready?

Are you looking for something? - The nudists.

Did anyone see nudists here? - You wish, gendarme.

Cruchot, Fougasse, here.

We'll get them. I swear.

Look into my eyes.

Alert.

Come on.

Not too wet? - Still walking around?

We'll get them. - Definitely.

That way. Attack.

Don't let it get to you, sergeant. We'll get them.

Here's a bowl of chicken broth for you.

The complaints keep coming.

Soon they'll be walking into the harbour naked.

Here, have some broth.

I lost face, Cruchot. Let me die.

Drink this. And undo that belt.