The Tudors

I must report to the emperor that it has not rained in over two months.

Some say it is the hottest summer in living memory...

which is a great inconvenience to the 500 citizens...

the king has incarcerated on charges of heresy.

His Majesty continues to demonstrate his perversity...

sometimes executing both Lutherans and Catholics...

on the same day.

But nothing deters the king from his amorous pursuits.

I am told he is already secretly married to Mistress Catherine Howard...

and intends to show her to the world tomorrow.

Mr. Culpepper- - Majesty.

Lady Rochford. - Your Majesty.

Catherine.

Will you not come to bed, my lord?

The king.

My lady. - My lady.

My lady.

Your Majesty. - Your Majesty.

My lady. - Your Majesty.

Your Majesty. - Your Majesty.

Your Majesty.

Your Majesty.

My lady.

Your Majesty.

Who is that talking to Chapuys?

It's Norfolk's eldest son, the Earl of Surrey.

The earl's been away for a few years practising his chivalry in France.

They say he writes poetry and runs a little wild.

Your Grace.

Excellency.

Your Grace seems somewhat distracted.

I was just thinking of those who are no longer here to sup with us.

I had a moment of nostalgia, even for my enemies.

I understand Thomas Boleyn died recently.

Yes. And the only mourners at his funeral...

were the ghosts of his children.

Your Grace.

Ambassador Chapuys.

Monsieur Marillac...

we are happy to accept your credentials from King Francis.

Welcome to our court.

I come here this day to introduce to you my new wife...

Queen Catherine.

I was first attracted to her by a notable appearance of honour...

cleanness and maidenly behaviour.

It seems incredible to have obtained such a perfect jewel of womanhood...

who bears towards me such perfect love.

A love that will not only bring me the peace and tranquillity I desire...

but may also bring forth the desired fruits of such a marriage.

To Queen Catherine.

Queen Catherine.

Now, let's eat. I'm starving.

Your Majesty, may I introduce the Earl of Surrey?

We're glad to welcome you back at court, Lord Surrey.

Majesty. - Allow me to introduce my new wife.

And my niece, I believe.

My lord.

Sir.

Majesty-

So you are the new French ambassador.

Tell me, Monsieur Marillac, what did your king really say...

when you told him His Majesty had got rid of his last queen?

Well, he didn't say much.

He just sighed very deeply and then he said:

Would you like to dance?

Go.

Wait.

Charles.

Bravo.

Monsieur Marillac.

Majesty?

Tell your master I was very sad to hear...

about the death of the dauphin, his eldest son.

Majesty-

His Majesty would like to propose a marriage between his second son...

Henri, Duke of Orléans, and your daughter, the Lady Mary.

How often it comes around.

Forgive me. You're new to all of this.

Do you know how old she is?

Seventeen.

Have you told your master about her?

What does he say?

I suppose he thinks I'm mad.

Or else he's just plain jealous.

Come here, ladies. Come and look at this.

The king sent it to me this morning.

So exciting.

Now, ladies, you must promise that from now on, as you are all sworn in...

you will all dress in the French fashion, like me.

Do you promise? - Yes, Your Majesty.

We are more than happy to oblige, Your Majesty.

Lady Rochford.

My lady. You have a letter, just delivered.

What is it?

Oh, nothing. Just an old friend, Joan Bulmer.

She says that she has heard of my great destiny...

and will I please now send for her to court?

She says that some altered circumstances have brought her...

to the utmost misery in the world and a most wretched life.

Shall you send for her?

I shall think on it, Lady Rochford.

Now, ladies, why don't we try on your new dresses?

Yes, madam.

I'll tell you another amusing thing about the French.

To celebrate the winter solstice in Paris...

they build a bonfire, and on the top of it...

they put a barrel, a wheel, garlands...

and a basket filled with two dozen cats and a fox to be burned alive...

for the king's pleasure.

I actually saw King Francis himself light it with a torch...

wrapped in red velvet, of course.

Tell me, my Lord Surrey, after so long away...

how do you find the English court?

I find it full of mean creatures.

Many of them in the service of His Majesty.

Of whom do you speak? - Those men of vile birth:

Lawyers, university men.

Machiavellian intriguers whose only desire...

is the destruction of the nobility of this country.

And I hate them all.

You mean men like the Seymours?

One cannot forget their sister provided the king with an heir to the throne.

And now that you've returned...

what are your ambitions?

To surpass the achievements of my father and my grandfather.

That is a very high ambition, my lord.

I'm a Howard.

It is expected of me and always has been.

And I will not fail.

Any deer?

Try over there!

Majesty, you've caught nothing all day beyond some rabbits and a deer...

but you're still smiling.

Have I not every reason to be happy?

You've seen the queen. - Whoa, boy. Here, boy.

Shouldn't the man that that woman gives herself to always be happy?

I'd say he'd be beyond happiness, Majesty, in a higher state altogether.

Go! GO!

I feel almost like a new man, Charles.

I'm no longer vexed by the things that before vexed me daily.

And even my leg is beginning to heal. Sex, great medicine.

Indeed. You are very fortunate.

How is your Catherine?

She's well...

although she no longer loves me as she once did.

We live mostly apart. - Take a mistress.

I would rather make her love me again, if I could.

I want to take the queen on a visit soon.

I want the people to see her as I see her.

Majesty-

And her kinsman, Lord Surrey.

I want to make him a cupbearer and give him other tokens of our esteem.

I'm sure His Lordship will be most grateful.

No, my lord. He will merely see it as his birthright.

Master Culpepper. Come on, boy.

Have them flush us out something edible.

Yes, Majesty. Beaters!

Go on.

Do I look all right?

Majesty, the Lady Mary.

Lady Mary.

Madam.

It gives me such pleasure to meet you.

The king talks about you often... No, all the time, with such affection.

It is my dearest wish that you and I may be kind...

and loving and warm to each other.

After all, Lady Mary, you are now my stepdaughter.

I shall attend upon Your Majesty...

whenever Your Majesty chooses to invite me.

Thank you.

Will you stay a while?

My maids have made some cakes.

No, thank you.

I bid you a good day.

Madam.

Your old friend is here, Miss Joan Bulmer.

Catherine.

Are you not the luckiest, most fortunate woman in all the world?

Joan, I... - You're not pleased to see me?

Of course I'm pleased.

We used to be so close, didn't we?

You know the unfeigned love my heart has always borne towards you.

You are going to give me a position, I presume?

I may, but you must understand...

Otherwise I must persist in my wretchedness.

In my misery.

Say you will not turn me away.

Do you remember when you-know-who used to come in...

late at night and slip into bed?

For God's sake. Be careful what you say.

But you will make me one of your ladies, won't you...

sweet Catherine?

My lords, there are new reports of disturbances in France. Sit.

There is a quarrel between the French garrison at Ardres...

and our own at Guînes.

The French built a castle at Ardres...

and then a bridge into the Pale of Calais.

When our soldiers pulled it down, the French promptly rebuilt it.

Now, I mean to show these French that I will not shy away...

from battle if I am provoked. For reasons which I'm sending...