The Son of Bigfoot

Dr. Harrison, stop.

You can't run forever.

There's no escape, Doctor.

You're coming with us.

Don't use your dart gun. We got him cornered.

Argh! We were so close...

Daddy.

- Hmm? - Daddy.

Adam Harrison!

Huh? Oh, yes, sir?

No sleeping in detention.

Use this time for something productive.

What?

What's going on back there?

That's disgusting!

Adam, what's the problem?

It looks like someone stuck six packs of gum in my hair.

I didn't see nothing.

Tony,

go to the office.

Not again!

Ow!

You're dead, snitch!

Ow. Ow!

Holy crap, what's happening to me?

Oh!

Look at his shoes!

Huh? What... What?

Spaz alert.

He used to be in my History class.

That's why I changed classes.

He's got like no friends.

Hey, Adam. Are you okay?

Don't run, I don't bite.

Well, look who it is.

How ya doing, snitch?

Leave me alone.

Hey there, mop-top, whatcha doin'?

Are you on your way to the janitor's closet?

'Cause you look like a mop!

Good one!

Seriously, that counts as a good one?

Give me a break!

Good one!

That's a good one.

Get off me!

What? You gonna rat me out again?

Hard to say. It depends on the circumstances.

Wrong answer, snitch!

Stop!

Okay, you've had enough.

Here, let me help you.

Look at his shoes! What a freak!

Oh, hey, you forgot your backpack!

Cha-ching! Two points!

Jerks...

It was those boys again wasn't it?

No, I told you. I was playing soccer

with my friends and the ball hit me in the face.

Oh, yeah? What friends of yours play soccer?

Uh... The British ones...

My mates. But they call soccer "football."

Oh, do they? And how did this happen?

Soccer can be a dangerous sport.

Adam, quit messing around.

What are we going to do about this?

Either we chop it out, or we chew it out.

I vote chew.

Ugh. I vote chop.

Turn around.

You had such nice, long hair.

At least they can't make fun of my hair anymore.

Holy crap!

Adam, You're gonna be late!

I'll be down in a minute!

Adam...

That's not gonna work.

What's taking so long?

Are you all right?

I'm fine!

I guess your meatloaf didn't agree with me.

I thought you loved my meatloaf.

Love is a strong word. I like it.

No, like's too strong.

Hey, I hate your meatloaf.

What?

Listen, my meatloaf is...

Oh, Adam.

- What? - That hat...

What about it?

That was your father's.

Oh, sorry.

Why are you sorry?

I dunno.

He died. I didn't mean to make you sad.

He was a great man.

I wish I knew him.

I did a sloppy job on your hair.

I must have been more tired than I thought.

Here, let's put this back on.

It looks good on you.

Now hurry up, you're going to be late for school.

I can't believe you don't like my meatloaf.

I'll let you in on a secret, Mom.

Nobody likes your meatloaf.

Okay. Well, enjoy your lunch.

It's meatloaf, isn't it?

Mmm. Could be.

All powerful men have one thing in common.

Great hair.

HairCo toupees have been worn in secret

by some of the greatest men in history.

But you're not here to be a part of our past,

you're here to be part of the future.

Make no mistake, gentlemen, hair is a growth business.

I'm afraid we'll need to ask you for your cameras.

Huh?

Mr. Kobayashi, I must insist.

Oh.

Ooh.

This is where the magic happens.

The future isn't toupees, no, no, no.

The future lies in growing real hair.

We're not talking about embarrassing hair plugs,

useless scalp massagers, or fancy shampoo.

We're talking about genetic engineering.

State of the art DNA manipulation.

We're on the verge of a major breakthrough

that will change the lives of hundreds of millions of people...

And make us a fortune in the process.

Dr. Billingsley is our head of experimental research and development.

Ah, here comes one of our eager young interns.

Uh, Dr. Billingsley?

I'm getting college cedit for this, right?

Of course.

Oh, okay. I'll just need you to sign my work experience time sheet.

Stand on the "X."

Hold on, you're not going to shoot me with...

Ow!

Ouch!

Oh.

Whoa.

Oh!

Ooh.

Now, you may experience a slight burning sensation.

But don't worry about it.

Help me!

As you can see,

we're still perfecting the formula.

Once we do, people will pay anything for it.

The real money is in big hair.

Hmm. Reduce fluoroantimonic acid by five percent.

We have a no fighting policy at this school,

zero tolerance.

You fight, you're suspended!

You're suspended!

Do you hear me? Suspended!

You're so funny.

Hey, you better watch your back, snitch.

Adam Harrison.

I believe this belongs to you.

Nametag was on the inside.

Oh, thank you, sir!

Don't be throwing it into basketball hoops anymore.

What? Why would I throw my own bag into a basketball hoop?

Who knows why you kids do anything?

Adam, you are what we call a...

Mildred.

Uh, what are we saying instead of spazoid these days?

Uh, normally challenged, sir.

Oh, and, uh...

How would I say "friendless loser"?

Mid-level acquaintance deficiency.

Adam, you have mid-level acquaintance deficiency.

Do they make a pill for that?

No, sir.

Apparently, there's nothing we can do for you.

This acting out needs to stop.

But, sir...

We have a no fighting policy at this school.

Zero tolerance. You fight, you're suspended.

Getting beat up counts as fighting?

A fist can't punch without a face to receive it.

No fighting means no fighting.

Oh, and, Adam?

Yes, sir?

We have zero tolerance on hats.

No hats in school.

And get a haircut.

What...

Hmm?

Hey, Harrison, you got me suspended!

You should be happy. You hate school.

My dad's going to kill me.

He's got a 10 strikes policy,

and this is strike 10.

Come on, guys, you heard Principal Jones. He said no fighting.

He said no fighting on school property.

How do I look?

You look like stupid Adam.