Better Call Saul

Jesus.

It can't be done.

You sure about that?

Ah. There's a trick, huh?

There's gotta be. This guy wouldn't put money on it unless there's a trick.

I'm telling you, it can't be done.

$0 you give up?

Yeah. All right.

Let's see it.

- Oh, oh-- Wait, what? -No way.

Show me that again.

- Sure. You got another 20? -Ahh.

Screw this.

Ah, don't go away mad.

Oh, hey, guys. You wanna buy a Rolex?

Whoa, whoa, hold on. How much for that cheap piece of crap?

- Look what the wind blew in. -Hey.

Holy crap. Jimmy, my man. I said you would beat the rap.

- Hey, Merna. Set him up. -No thanks. I'm good.

No, go on. He don't mean it. You just got out of jail. Come on.

You're not gonna have a drink? That'll be the day.

Settle down. I'm in a rush. My brother's outside in a taxi.

- The meter's running. -What, Chuck's outside?

Tell him to pull that broomstick out of his ass and get in here.

No. We got no time. We're catching a plane.

I came here to say goodbye.

I'm moving to Albuquerque, New Mexico.

Mexico? You skip bail?

New Mexico. You know, like Bugs Bunny and the Road Runner.

Okay, yeah. What are you gonna do there?

I'm gonna work at his law firm, like in the mailroom. To start, anyways.

Now you're talking crazy. You just got out of jail. Now you wanna go back?

- Working for him, that's all that is. -Marco.

I was done, you understand? I didn't beat the rap.

Chuck flew in and saved my ass. It's time to make some changes.

Hey. Listen to me. You're Slippin' Jimmy.

What do you got to change, huh?

Everything. It's time to grow up.

- Yeah, according to who? Chuck? -The same goes for you, man.

You want to spend the rest of your life on that stool?

I mean, come on, Marco. Look at yourself.

All right, that's him. I gotta hit it.

- Jeez. His master's voice. -Really?

Come on. Go outside. Tell Chuckles that you got some business you forgot.

- Marco. -Come on.

You gotta have one last blowout.

We'll do the watch thing again.

But maybe we'll pull that tar-money scam you were talking about.

Get some girls.

- I made a promise. -Yeah, you made a promise.

But it was-- What do you call it? --under duress.

Look, he got you out of jail, okay? But he's your brother.

- I mean, what else is he gonna do? -Marco. Listen to me, all right?

Chuck's not making me do this.

He's giving me an opportunity and I'm grabbing it.

Gee, it's like watching Miles Davis give up the trumpet.

What? What does that even mean?

It's just a waste, is all I'm saying.

Look, I'm gonna fly out there. I'm gonna get settled.

And I'll call you, okay?

All right, Jimmy.

Hey, have a safe flight, all right?

Hey.

Hey.

What's up?

Just waiting to talk to Howard.

Can I ask about what?

I'm taking your advice. I'm giving the case to HHM.

Why?

The fact that Chuck doesn't want me here...

...has something to do with it.

I'm so sorry.

- Why didn't you just tell me? -I just...

I didn't want you hating your own brother.

HOWARD". How'd you find out? Did Kim tell you?

I figured it out on my own.

It's about time, right?

I brought the Sandpiper stuff with me. It's down in my car.

I figure your guys could do the outreach.

If any of those geezers don't wanna sign with you...

...just give me their names, I'll talk them into it.

You know, Jimmy, I never wanted it to go this way.

- If it had been up to me, we would have-- -Howard, I get it.

Your brother's very important to the firm.

Sorry I called you a pig fucker.

Well...

We owe you some money, don't we?

The of-counsel fee.

I think we discussed 20,000.

That and whatever the common-fund proceeds of Sandpiper...

...ultimately adds up to, you'll receive 20 percent of that.

Should be a very nice payday for you when it comes.

YEP-

I've got something for you too.

It's a shopping list for Chuck.

He's doing better, but he still needs deliveries every day.

I think he'd be more comfortable with someone else doing it.

I see.

You don't have to do it personally. It just needs to get done.

It's pretty straightforward. The ice is a pain in the ass.

But he needs it. I usually sneak into a motel and fill a garbage bag.

But you can have whoever you hire just buy it.

Most important thing is the newspapers.

The New York Times. The Wall Street Journal. They're a must.

There's a newsstand on Eubank that has both of them at 6 a.m.

Which is good. He's an early riser. The Albuquerque Journal gets delivered.

But somebody still has to bring it in for him.

You've been doing all of this every day?

For over a year?

- You'll take care of this? -Absolutely.

I'll get it done and done right.

I always liked you, Jimmy.

Remember? I used to call you Charlie Hustle.

Yeah, I remember that.

I'm sorry I yelled at you.

That was nice.

You sure you're all right?

- It's not a crime to let it out. -There's nothing to let out.

Chuck's a sick man.

That's no excuse.

He's my brother. He thinks I'm a scumbag.

There's nothing I can do to change that.

What else is there to say?

Wow, that's mature.

Dalai Lama's got nothing on me.

0-64. As in "Oh, to be 64 again."

O-64.

All right. Next up, we got N-32.

N as in "Nancy Reagan"...

...First Lady with a lot of style.

Anybody else seen Hellcats of the Navy?

All right. No winners yet?

Okay. Here's B-2.

Just like the B-2 bomber, the Stealth.

Probably one taking off over at Kirtland right now.

We would never know because it's stealthy.

Still no winners?

No?

Here we have...

...B-4. Another B. How about that. As in:

"Before too long, we're gonna have another winner."

No? Nobody? Okay.

All right. Ahem.

And here comes--

Hey, it's our old friend B. Heh. B-12.

B as in, uh...

B as in...

..."betrayal."

Benedict Arnold betrayed the United States.

Still no winners?

No?

Okay.

Here it is.

Oh, what are the odds?

Four B's in a row. That's... Heh.

B-7.

B as in...

B as in...

..."brother."

Brother.

B-7. Seven brides for seven brothers.

I'm sure a lot of you have brothers. It's not like mine though.

Any winners yet? Take another look, okay? I'll wait.

I'm gonna say if it's another B, we could have a real problem here.

And...

Hey, it is another B.

B-5, as in:

"Boy, this B thing is really starting to tick me off."

B as in "battleship." B as in "bourbon." B as in "Belize."

Beautiful place, so I've heard.

I would love to go there, but let's face it, that's never gonna happen.

None of us is ever leaving this godforsaken wasteland.

Sorry-

Scratch that.

Moving on?

I mean, what is it with this place?

It's like living inside an Easy Bake Oven.

I mean, look out that window.

It's like a soulless, radioactive Georgia O'Keeffe hellscape out there...

...crawling with coral snakes and scorpions, and...

You ever see the movie The Hills Have Eyes?

It's a documentary.

God forbid, your car breaks down, you have to walk 10 steps.

You have melanoma the size of a pineapple where your head used to be.

So you ask, "Why?" Why, if that's how I feel, why do I live here? Why?

Excuse me.

- Are you gonna read that number? -Yeah. I'm gonna read your number.

It's another B. Ha.

It's another freaking B. Of course. Why not? Why not?

And the next number...

Quick question. Who here knows what a Chicago Sunroof is?

Anybody? You, sir? No? Okay.

True story. Back home, there was this guy named Chet.

Now, Chet was a real asshole.

He might have owed me some money. He might have slept with my wife...

...before she became my ex-wife. The details don't matter.

Suffice it to say, I was wronged.

All right. So one summer evening...

...I was out having a few drinks, one or two, maybe three. Ha.

You get the picture. And who do I see? Chet.