Hot Rod

Kevin. Did we reinforce the take-off ramp?

Nah, we didn't have time.

Cool.

Soul of an eagle.

Oh, shit.

Are you okay?

What's up, little riders?

I'm jumping the public pool tomorrow. 2 bucks. Tell your friends.

Eat some smoke!

That's just a sample.

See you there.

Pink grapefruit.

Yes.

-Toasted marshmallow. -Yes.

Finish her off.

Raspberry?

Psych! Very Cherry.

A hundred straight.

I'm gonna go drop some dumpage.

-Voltron? -That's me.

-Hi, Dave. -How you doing, Cathy?

Why'd you call yourself Voltron?

I don't know. Maybe 'cause it's super badass.

-You're weird. -Hells, yeah, I am.

Yoo-hoo, shitheads.

I just found a bag of fireworks in the men's restroom.

Would you guys like to light them off?

All right, boys. Prepare to be dazzled.

Jumping the pool tomorrow!

God damn. Rod!

Mom? Have you seen my hip pads?

In the kitchen.

Rod, maybe you shouldn't fight Frank this week.

You know, you could rest up for the jump tomorrow.

Relax, Kev. I'm gonna win this time. I did, like, 40 crunches yesterday.

What is it with you two, anyway?

You wouldn't understand, Kevin.

He's your real dad so he automatically loves you.

But he's my stepdad. I have to earn it.

Ancestors, protect me

May they protect you

Frank?

Frank.

Frank!

Never sneak up on a man who's been in a chemical fire.

-Sorry. -On your feet.

What's this?

Rhodesian fighting sticks. Very, very lethal.

Rhodesian. Of course.

Come on.

You are pathetic!

Stop, stop, I give up! I give up!

Yeah.

No, Frank!

Play the victim, and you will be the victim.

Very good, Frank.

Very impressive. Ultimate punch!

I'm gonna knock that ridiculous mustache

right off your face.

All great men have mustaches, Frank.

Yeah, but real men actually grow them.

You know I have a hormone disorder!

You'll see, Frank.

One day, I'll punch you right in the face, and then you'll respect me.

I'll believe it when I see it, muchacho.

Take out the trash.

Nailed it.

Rod?

-Denise! -Hey!

How's it going?

Oh.

Great. Everything's going super great.

You look different.

Oh, really? Well, it's been a while.

You look...

You look pretty much exactly the same.

Yeah. Thanks.

And I see you're still doing your stunts.

Big time.

Actually...

Here. Peep the strategy.

You're jumping the pool? Wow!

Yeah, it's the real deal. You should come.

Maybe I will. Thanks.

Cool.

Well, I gotta go. I gotta feed Buddy, but very nice to see you, Rod.

Yeah, you too.

You look pretty.

What did you say?

I said you look shitty. Good night, Denise.

Hey, Pop.

It's me, Rod.

I sure wish you were alive.

You'd tell me how much you respect me

and we'd do stunts and grow mustaches together.

You may have died an anonymous stuntman,

but you live on through me.

I miss you, Daddy.

Hey, Rod?

Get out!

All right, everybody, let's clear the pool.

There's gonna be a jump.

Come on, seriously, guys. It's gonna be pretty amazing.

Okeydoke, Rod. It's regulation size.

Thanks, Rico. Hey, have you seen Kevin anywhere?

He's not here.

What do you mean he's not here? He's team manager.

-He has to be here. -I know, right?

Richardson, out of the pool. Let's go.

No can do, Dave.

Come on, Richardson. You're being a tool, man.

There is no tool in this pool.

And I'd happily get out, if you let me join your crew.

You can't join the crew, Richardson. You don't do anything.

Oh, don't l?

You like what you see?

Hey.

Denise. Hey.

Looks exciting. Is there anything I can do to help?

Oh, no, it's cool.

Stop it!

I think my crew's got it pretty much covered.

So...

-Good luck. -Don't worry, Denise.

I've done this before.

Totem spirit, fox.

Please, God, don't let me embarrass myself in front of Denise.

Hello?

I'm home.

Kevin?

You missed the jump.

I totally landed it.

Rod, thank goodness you're home.

What's going on? Is this some sort of interactive theater art piece?

It's Frank. He's very sick.

What? Since when?

Since 21 years ago.

It's his heart.

He needs a transplant, and our insurance won't cover it.

They say he's too high-risk. Oh, Rod.

He doesn't have much time left.

No way.

We would've told you sooner, but we knew how much it would upset you.

So, you just decided to keep me and Kevin in the dark?

Oh, no, we told Kevin. We just didn't think you could handle it.

I can handle it.

I love you, Kevin. I want you to have my watch.

I love you, too, Dad.

Hold on, Frank! Don't die!

Let's let them talk.

Sorry, boy. My time's up.

But I still need to kick your ass. How can I do that if you're dead?

Well, then, I guess I'll die still champion.

No way. Let's do it right now. One more for the road.

Beating me wouldn't mean anything now. I'm all through.

All I want is to earn your respect, Frank. How can I do that if you won't fight me?

Well, maybe you should've thought of that

before you sucked at being a man all your life.

Oh, my God. I hate you so much, I just wanna smash your face in.

Too late. I'm a dead man.

What about the transplant?

Oh, sure. 50 grand. You gonna pay for it?

-No! -'Course you're not.

Let's face it. You're a kid.

You live at home. You got no job.

All you're good for is goofing around with your friends on your moped.

You're wrong, Frank. I'm not a kid. I'm a man.

I am gonna get you better. And then I'm gonna beat you to death!

You couldn't beat a drum.

-Rod, are you okay? -I need to go to my quiet place!

Shit!

Oh, my God!

And that is how it's done.

Wow.

It's amazing.

That really hurt.

Okay, you guys. Thanks for meeting me.

As you all know, I recently found out that my stepfather, Frank,

is on his deathbed.

I needed to think last night, so I galloped into a wooded glen.

And after punch-dancing out my rage

and suffering an extremely long and very painful fall,

I realized what has to be done.

We're gonna raise the money to save Frank's life.

Well, that's awesome, Rod,

but how exactly do you plan on doing that?

One big jump, gentlemen.

The biggest jump this town's ever seen.

We're gonna jump 15 buses.

Whoa. Come on, Rod.

That's nearly as many as Evel Knievel jumped.

It's actually one more than Evel Knievel jumped, Rico. I know.

I checked. Online.

Now, I've gotta be in top physical form if we're gonna do this jump.

-I'm sorry, Dave. -What's that?

Where are you going?

I'm sorry, man. I just realized, I'm late for work at the ice rink.

-So, is that a problem? -Yes.

Now, this jump demands that I be in top physical condition.

I've already drafted a rough schedule of exercises