Helluva Boss

*car horns* *honking*

Alright now I know business has been... a bit slow lately

Yes, and it's no ones fault, okay?

I'm not naming any names here... Moxxie.

Now does anyone have any bright ideas on how we can get business drumming up again?

What, about, a car wash?

This is hell, millie, no one cares about cars being clean here, okay?

Wha-ooh! What about a billboard?

We can't afford a billboard, sir

Helpful, Moxxie, really glad you're in the room right now

Have you guys forgotten what service we provide?

*click*

Haha!

*BOOM*

*Unintelligible Screams*

*Shing!*

Heh heh heh!

Ahhh! reh, Ahhhh!

Ah, those were the good times!

I don't need any reminding, sir

Considering you blew most of our salaries on an obnoxious TV ad last week!

One that you then additionally paid to have run for full 3 hours on a channel nobody watches!

uh, hey, excuse me

What's obnoxious about a super fun jingle, alright?

It's a fun distraction when an advertisement's spitting bullshit!

People love musicals sir!

Exactly, Millie!

And we're basically doing a musical

Are you going to crush my musical theatre dreams like my dad did?

Sir...

Cause right now, all i see is just my dads ASSHOLE talking to me

Crushing my dreams of being who I truly am inside!

Are you trying to crush his dreams, Moxxie?

I-What?

I thought I knew you

I can't believe you Moxxie after I made you employee of the month!

Okay! Sir,

*Inhales*

I'm sorry, a commercial jingle is not comparable to musical theatre!

Nobody actually likes the jingles!

I liked it!

Do not... Do not agree with him in front of me

Hi there Im Blitzo the O is silent

And im the founder of I.M.P.

Are you a piece of shit yourself sent to hell?

Or are you an innocent soul who FUCKED over by someone else?

After lovingly killing my wife for FUCKING A DELIVERY MAN, you can imagine my surprise when I wound up here! After the state of Ohio killed me!

I really wish I could stick it to that YAPPY JOGGER who saw me hiding the body!

Well luckily for you thanks to our companies special access to the living world

We can help you take care of your unfinished business by taking out anyone who screwed you over when-you-were-alive!

When you want somebody gone!

And you don't want to wait to long!

Call the immediate murder professionals!

And grenade or cyanide we'll make it look like suicide!

The Immediate! Murder! Professionals

We do our job so well!

Because we come straight up from hell!

We'll kill your husband or your wife

We'll even let you keep the knife!

The Immediate! Murder! Profession- *PEW!* Ooooh!

*Slam!*

Doctor he's not responding!

Ooh! Water! Stat!

*Whapam!*

It didn't do anything...

Ugh, Damnit!

I'm not losing another one!

*Electricity powering up*

Clear!

*Zap!*

*Sharp Inhale*

Holy shit it actually worked...

He appears to be in stable condition but he'll need surgery

Now what insurance provider do freaks have?

The FUCK is insurance?

*glass breaks* Ahhhhh!

Ooh! *bang*

*Snap!* Ahhhhh!

Kids die for freeeeeee!

I'd like to go on record and say that incident was Loona's fault

Dispatch is supposed to give us the right info on the target

Its very simple

Oh sit on a dick, Moxxie

You sit! Sit on, a... in the... d- DO YOUR JOB!!

Hey, now we don't blame our screwups on Loona, Okay?

She didn't do anything wrong!

Are you kidding me, sir?

She's awful

*cute doggo phone rings*

Hello I.M.P.

*Unintelligible fast talking*

*Ring!*

Happy adoption anniversary Loony!

I got you a little something

Is it a cure for syphilis?

I... Oh...

Then I don't want it!

Ugh!

I'm sorry you love spiders...

God damnit

Um, excuse me, did you just fax me an ad for weight loss?

No

Wha..? why-why would anyone send me this?

Come on. You know why

Whoever left the fucking... avocado salad in the fridge... I'm taking it because I have the worst hangover right now

Why would you drink on a work night?

I'm hungover from this morning, dumbass

Isn't that my lunch?

You know what? I can't take this assault right now!

I need to blow off some fucking steam!

Haaaaaaaah!

*Doof!*

Blitzo, that clingy rich asshole is on the phone, says it's urgent, wants to talk to you

He sounds a little DTF'ey (DTF: down to fuck/sexual slang)

Oh god it was one time!

If I hadn't slept with that privileged asshole none of us would have access to the living world!

You what?

Got the book, got the book!

Got this fucking heavy book!

*grunts*

oh... oh shit!

*part foul*

sorry I fucked your husband (:

BLITZ!!!

I heard you alrea-

So... what can I do you for this time Stolas?

There's a political candidate causing trouble up on Earth for a few of my associates.

He's trying to convince people global warming exists!

Doesn't it?

Well, yes, but more people die if nothing is done about it