Cristela

Ooh, Maddie, which is better?

Do you have an appointment?

Mr. Culpepper doesn't take walk-ins.

Or...

Do you have an appointment?

'Cause Mr. Culpepper does not take walk-ins, okay?

I gotta say, Cris, they sound like the same words.

Hey, hey! There she is.

Temporary assistant to El Jefe.

Pretty amazing, huh?

Yeah. You're handling it so well.

I know. Wait. What?

Oh. Uh, you're just...

you know, you're so positive about everything,

even a demotion.

A demotion? Uh, da-da-da-da.

No.

Paid position. Unpaid intern.

Mr. Culpepper could've picked anyone.

He picked me.

Yeah, there's that can-do attitude,

even in the face of bad news.

It's not bad news.

I do good here, I've got an inside track to associate.

No. You've got an inside track to permanent assistant.

Okay? You should've said "no."

When powerful people see you in a certain way,

they don't change their minds.

That's not true.

I was good at the drive-thru window

and then they put me in charge of...

The dining room.

Not sure I would put that restaurant manager

in the category of "powerful people."

Uh, he was manager at a fish restaurant.

That's pretty much king of the sea.

Good morning.

Oh! Sir!

I've got your coffee, your newspaper,

and your morning sudoku puzzle.

Oh, looks like a tough one. I would put a 9 right there.

Well... Don't overstep.

But... 9 looks right. Yeah.

Need to give you the bat phone.

Ah, bat phone!

Hey, Batman, this is commissioner Gordon.

The riddler's escaped.

Maybe we should call it something else.

Ah! Star trek communicator?

The aliens are slowly approaching.

Bat phone it is.

Now that thing rings,

no matter what time it is or where you are,

you pick it up.

Oh. Sounds like an important job.

Sure is.

Oh, they've, uh, come up with some kind

of indestructible golf tees.

Get me a box of those, will you?

Yes. On it.

Now, everybody, listen up.

While I'm in the cattleman's association banquet

in Houston, Cristela is my eyes and ears.

She's in charge.

Of everything, sir, or just the golf tees?

Nobody likes a smart-ass.

So Malcolm took my pencil box,

and when I grabbed it back, miss Allen was looking,

and she gave us both yellow cards for the day.

Well, Henry, you need to talk to the teacher

and explain what happened.

Or wait for Malcolm outside of school.

And handle it yourself.

That's right.

Ama, I'm the mom. I'll take care of it.

I'm just saying that in my village,

being a tattletale is how people disappear.

Well, I think we need to focus on the important part of dinner,

which is your grandma's amazing mole.

Mm-hmm.

Oh, and how peaceful it is

with no... Cristela.

Hey, guys! Sorry I'm late.

So good to see you.

Okay, I'm gonna go ahead and finish this in the living room.

Oh, good. Ama made mole.

I don't know what the secret ingredient is, but...

I know it's not love.

Hey, congratulations, Cris.

Your aunt got a promotion.

Ha. Don't get too excited.

Remember, it's just for the week.

Oh. So what will you be doing now?

Oh. Important assisting stuff, like, um...

Opening the paper to the word puzzles

and getting new golf tees...

It's all very complicated.

It doesn't sound complicated.

It sounds like what you did as an intern.

Ah, but I'm getting paid.

Cris, will you still be able to take ama

to her doctor's appointment tomorrow?

Ohh. 'Fraid not.

I've gotta take Mr. Culpepper's car to get washed.

He's convinced if I take it there,

I'll get a family discount.

I'll skip my appointment.

Every time I go to the doctor, they find something wrong.

Because there usually is.

When was the last time

you checked your blood pressure, ama?

Oh, last month

at the free machines in the pharmacy.

I won. I got the high score.

They can't refill your prescription if you don't go.

You know my rule.

I only go to the doctor when there are three things wrong.

That way, it's worth it.

I hate that rule.

Remember in seventh grade when I broke my toe?

I had to wait till I had strep throat and poison oak.

My blood pressure and my headaches are only two things.

You're getting headaches?

Haven't you noticed I have been less fun?

Yeah, since 1986.

It's still only two things wrong.

If you need a third, I'll go find some poison oak.

Fine. I'll go.

You need to keep track of that blood pressure.

You're no spring chicken, ama.

Why do people say that?

Do you know how long a spring chicken lives?

One summer.

Then you snap his neck, pull out his guts,

toss him in the oven.

Mmm!

And he is delicious.

I'm not hungry anymore.

Got the golf tees.

Looks like someone's teed up for a promotion.

Yeah, maybe you'll skip associate

and go straight to partner.

Uh-huh. Okay.

Wait, wait. What are you doing?

Oh, I'm just writing a note to tell Mr. Culpepper

that you were late today.

But I wasn't.

Who's he gonna believe,

the person in charge or the unpaid intern?

Yes?

Okay.

No problem.

On it.

Bye, commissioner Gordon.

Right. I'll never call you that again.

So? What did he say?

Uh... He forgot the boots

that the cattlemen's association gave him at last year's dinner,

and he needs them by Friday.

This sounds like a job for bootman and Robin.

Hey.

Hey.

Oh, I need to give you a message.

Ay, Felix, we've been through this.

It's pronounced massage.

No, the doctor's office called for your mom.

She needs to call 'em back.

W-what did they say?

"Can you please have Natalia call us back?"

No, were they concerned? How did they sound?

Like they want her to call back.

Cris, something's wrong with ama.

You're just figuring that out?

Felix, tell her.

It has to do with her doctor's appointment.

The massage

was "please have Natalia call us back."

Daniela, mom's unbreakable.

I stepped on hundreds of cracks,

and her back is completely straight.

Daniela, she'll call back tomorrow.

I'm sure it's nothing to be worried about.

Cris, we can relax! Felix says everything's gonna be okay.

Daniela, mom's fine. She's been taking her walks.

She walks... around the corner,

and she stands right there,

folding her arms and judging the neighbors.

She calls it her cross-training.

Ay, dios mio.

What if this is it?

"It"? Well, what is "it"?

What, you think your mom's dying?

Why would you say that?!

Why would you put that thought in our heads?!

Why did I answer the phone?

Ama, you're home!

How was the doctor's?

It was terrible, and not in a good way.

What happened?

The doctor got mad when I told him,