Grey's Anatomy

Greys Anatomy S05E06

previously on "grey's anatomy"...

the chief is under the spell of some insane man in camouflage.

major owen hunt. I'm a trauma surgeon.

You're reading your mom's diary?

I'm not half the surgeon my mother was.

the chief wants us to give george one of our interns?

You di't even think to ask for me?

Screw you,Dr. O'malley.

We can take it slow.

Maybe just first base.

Meredith.

I'm only opening one box.

The plan was not to open any.

The plan was to take your mom's boxes up to the attic.

look. It's anatomy jane.

for a surgeon,every patient is a battlefield.

I'll never have my own office.

They're our terrain,where we advance,retreat...

try to remove all the land mines.

And she still has her little twosh.

-Her what? -Anatomy jane had detachable organs.

And I could never remember their real names,so I made up names.

Like,the twosh was next to the chubbel,and that was connected to the slivvy.

,And look. It's the jelly pouch.

The jelly pouch. My favorite.

Still can't get enough of the jelly pouch.

And just when you think you've won the battle,made the world safe again...

Along comes another land mine.

-So are we screwing other people or not? -What?

I just want to know if you're gonna go off and screw o'malley or some other loser,

because then I don't have to cancel my plans with the chick from peds.

you're an ass.

What?

-that was amazing. -Yay.

It was for me,too.

-I mean,that was amazing. -For me,too.

my whole life...

my whole adult life,I have been with men.

And it always felt,you know,fine,good,but...

I never...

I mean--I mean,I did,but not...

not like this.

this is like needing glasses.

-um,I've blinded you? -no.

When I was a kid,I would get these headaches,

and I went to the doctor,and they said that I needed glasses.

I didn't understand that.

It didn't make sense to me because I could see fine.

And then I get the glasses,and I put them on,

and I'm in the car on the way home,and suddenly I yell...

because the big green blobs that I had been staring at my whole life,

they weren't big green blobs.

they were leaves on trees.

I could see the leaves.

And I didn't even know I was missing the leaves.

I didn't even know that leaves existed,and then...

leaves.

You are glasses.

I am so gay.

I am so,so,so gay.

I am extremely gay.

I have to go.

Ah,gentlemen.

I want you to meet the new head of trauma at seattle grace.

Major owen hunt,you remember derek shepherd,mark sloan.

-He stole my patient. -Mine,too.

Now you'll get a chance to steal mine.

-Looking forward to it. -Ah,can't wait.

I just talked to a friend of mine at the D.O.H.

Now that we have owen,we are being reclassified as a level i trauma unit by the end of the month.

That explains it.

So my mom bought it for me when I was 5...

which is a super creepy gift for a 5 year old,but I kinda liked it.

Run!

Okay.

-what was that all about? -I just saw owen.

Major owen hunt. You know,the guy who pulled the icicle from my chest.

I thought he was in iraq.

Well,yeah,he was and now he's here,I mean,at my hospital.

-Okay,so? -So...

so we kissed.

I mean he kissed me.

It was stupid. It was nothing. It was a stupid nothing.

But you don't think he thinks it was a stupid nothing.

Well,I mean,he obviously likes me,and now he's back. What's he doing back?

You don't think he quit the military for you.

I mean,that would be severely stalkery,but very romantic.

I'm not getting involved with another attending.

Coast clear?

-You paged me,chief? -Uh,yes,I did.

'Cause generally,when I'm paged to the helipad, there's something landing on the helipad.

Yeah.

You pulled off a 12-person domino surgery last week.

That's the kind of thing we need every week.

It's also the kind of thing that shows me that you're gonna be a great surgeon someday.

-Well,thank you,sir. -It's not enough.

I don't want you to be just great,miranda.

I want you to be the best,and if you're gonna succeed me as the best general surgeon in this hospital,

you need to start now,today,which means you need to be me.

U want to take point on a surgery? Take point.

A problem comes up? Solve it.

Don't talk to me. Just do it.

Be me.

-Be you? -Be me.

I could do that.

I don't know why you had to bring me all the way up here to the-- that's why.

Lake washington med is sending over a 10-year-old girl with an abdominal leiomyosarcoma.

It's inoperable.

You're gonna have to put together a team and come up with a plan to save her.

Save a girl with an inoperable tumor?

It isn't easy being me.

-what's wrong with you? -What's wrong with me?

We've been sleeping together for a week,and already,you're bored.

I'm hot and great in bed. So what is wrong with you?

Look,I didn't say I s bored.

I just asked whether or not I should keep sleeping with michelle.

I'm asking if you're all-in.

-What's so wrong with that? -You're a barbarian.

How can I be all-in with an actual barbarian?

Fine. Claudia in riology thinks I have a hot ass.

I'll tap that next.

You do that.

Oh,lexie.Would you mind pick--

lexie,I'm your roommate. You're eventually gonna have to talk tme.

-I reject that supposition. -I reject your rejection.

-And I ignore your rejection of my rejection. -What?

-I don't reject you,george. -Thank you.

Okay,two things-- you all have a skills lab this morning.

It is mandatory. Dot even think about trng to get out.

Second,one of you will not have to go to the mandatory skills lab

because you will be assisting me in my efforts to remove an inoperable tumor from a 10-year-old girl.

-I'll do it. -Yono,u won'T.

You have a hundred delinquent charts. You will do those after the lab.

Slacker.

How can you operate on an inoperable tumor?

Karev is also out.

-What did I say? -You doubted me.

Oh,I-I-I-don't doubt you,Dr. Bailey.

-Yang is out,too. -Why?

You weren't supportive of a fellow resident who couldn't get his paperwork under control.

-What is that? Grey,is that anatomy jane? -YeS.

With the 24 removable organs and the optional parts to simulate pregnancy?

Yes. Does that mean I'm out,too?

No,that means you're in.

-Oh,that's not fair. -yes!

Next time,you'll know to bring in an ugly doll,won't you,stevens?

Dr. Yang,what exactly happens in skills lab?

-Who e you? -I'm your new intern. Ryan spalding.

Oh,I'm never gonna remember that. You're,um,uh,4.2.

Three,move.

-Is everything okay? -Shut up. Don't move.

Hi,I'm Dr. Hunt.

Over the next few months,I will be teaching you how to work quickly and efficiently

to keep someone alive in circumstances where the safe bet is they're dead by the end of the hour.

Now does anyone have a problem working with live tissue?

-live tissue? -I don't know.

Anyone? Speak now.

In fact,leave now.

If not,I own you for the rest of the day.

Good. Here we go.

each resident gets a pig. Interns assist.

Hang on.

Go ahead.

Save their lives.

You're a monster.

They're under. They didn't feel any pain. Ask the veterinarian.

-You stabbed them. -So we can save them.

We can practice on--on surgical mannequins.

We can learn to do the exact same stuff.

-Does that mean you're out? -Yeah,I'm out.

In that case,who wants two pigs?

tori begler,age 10.

Tori has an abdominal leiomyosarcoma.

The tumor is wrapped around her celiac artery,her splenic artery and her left gastric artery.

It is considered unresectable.

Did you understand a word of that,tori?

Not really.

grey.

This is anatomy jane.

She's kinda funny looking.

She is funny looking,but she's very helpful.

So the tumor...

is way down here in your belly.

It's hard to get at because it's underneath all these organs.

Hard,but not impossible,right?

We're gonna try everything we can.

Everything you can should include your cardiothoracic gal.

Stewart at seattle pres said the vasculature is the big problem,

and you stole the best cardiovascular surgeon he's ever had.

If she's not on tori's team,we're leaving and going to san francisco.

Fudge? It's homemade.

-I love this hospital. -Yeah,enough small talk. Come on.

-More lessons? -No,no lessons. Just sex.

Nothing fancy. Just plain old missionary,boy/girl,penis/vagina sex.

Hey,hey,I mean it. No dirty talk. No erica talk.

No talk. Just grunting and grinding.

-Now who's talking dirty? -Shut up.

-What's this about? -I'm testing a theory.

Good. That looks good.