Love's Labour's Lost

Captioning made possible by buena vista television

September 1939. Ominous clouds of war may be gathering over Europe,

but here in navarre, the young king--

seen here returning from military maneuvers--

has announced an audacious plan for himself and his court.

He and his companions are to cast off their military uniforms...

While world events still allow, and devote themselves instead...

To a rigorous three years of study.

That's right, three years. They'll sleep little, eat and drink less...

And devote themselves instead to an inspiring program of self-improvement--

a real feast for bookworms.

Boldest of all, perhaps, is the king's absolute insistence...

That no women will be allowed inside the court.

Sorry, ladies, but he is the king.

There is just one exception-- madame holofernia, the king's principal tutor.

With her able assistant sir Nathaniel taking care of the men's spiritual health,

they should have everything they need...

To distract themselves from thoughts of romance.

Whoops! careful, sir. It's a tall order, by golly,

but this able young monarch, one of Europe's most eligible royal bachelors,

seems determined to show the world there's more to life than guns and warfare.

He's an idealist, but we wish him and his three chums the best.

We'll bring you more news as the adventure unfolds,

but for now we wish them bon voyage and good luck.

You three--

berowne, dumaine...

And longaville...

Have sworn for three years term to live with me,

my fellow scholars,

and to keep those statutes that are recorded...

In this... Schedule here.

Your oaths are passed, and now subscribe your names...

That his own hand may strike his honor down...

That violates the smallest branch herein.

If you are armed to do...

As sworn to do,

subscribe to your deep oaths...

And keep it, too.

I am resolved.

'Tis but a three years' fast.

The mind shall banquet...

Though the body pine.

To love, to wealth,

to pomp I pine and die,

with all these living in philosophy.

So much, dear liege, i have already sworn--

that is, to live and study here three years.

But there are other strict observances

as not to see a woman in that term,

and one day in a week to touch no food...

And but one meal on every day besides,

and then to sleep but three hours in the night

and not be seen to yawn of all the day?

Oh.

These are barren tasks, too hard to keep--

not to see ladies, study, fast, not sleep.

Your oath is passed to pass away from these.

Let me say no, my liege, and if you please,

I only swore to study with your grace...

And stay here in your court for three years' space.

You swore to that, berowne, and to the rest.

By yea and nay, sir. Then I had swore in jest.

What is the end of study, let me know?

Why, that to know which else we should not know.

Things hid and barred, you mean, from common sense?

Aye, that is study's god-like recompense.

As thus-- to study where I well may dine...

When I to feast expressly am forbid,

or study where to meet some mistress fine...

When mistresses from common sense are hid.

These be the stops that hinder study quite...

And train our intellects to vain delight.

Why, all delights are vain.

* I've seen for days that you've got some ways that must be checked *

* in you I never can detect *

* the slightest sign of intellect *

* your madam dances think of the chances you neglect *

* you never seem inclined to use your mind *

* you're just a fella who *

* has got his brains in his dancing shoes *

* take a lesson from me *

* I'd rather Charleston

* do-do, do-do * do-do, do-do

* think of what you might be *

* I'd rather Charleston

* do-do, do-do * do-do, do-do

* I'm disappointed in you and your ways *

* I'm double-jointed

* there's no sensation like syncopation *

* will you let me know why *

* I'd rather Charleston

* Charleston ?

* that's the sort of thing i would never do, so *

* leave it behind and give your mind to something new *

* I'd rather Charleston Charleston, Charleston *

* Charleston Charleston with you *

well, sit you out.

Go home, berowne. Adieu.

No, my good lord. I have sworn to stay with you.

but there are other strict observances.

"That no woman shall come within a mile of my court."

Hath this been proclaimed?

Four days ago.

Let's see the penalty. "On pain of losing her tongue."

Who devised this penalty?

Marry, that did I.

Sweet lord, and why?

Well, to fright them hence with the dread penalty.

A dangerous law against gentility.

"Item: if any man be seen to talk with a woman within the term of three years,

"he shall endure such public shame as the rest of the court...

Can possible devise."

This article, my liege, yourself must break, for well--

you know, here comes in embassy the French king's daughter...

With yourself to speak, a maid of grace and complete majesty...

About surrender up of aquitane to her decrepit, sick and bedrid father.

Therefore, this article is made in vain,

or vainly comes the admired Princess hither.

Ah! ah!

What say you, lords? Why, this was quite forgot.

We must of force dispense with this decree.

She must lie here on mere... necessity.

Necessity will make us all forsworn 3,000 times...

Within this three years space,

for every man with his affects is born,

not by might mastered, but by special grace.

If I break faith, this word shall speak for me.

I am forsworn on mere necessity.

So, to the laws at large,

I write my name and he that breaks them in the least degree...

Stands in attainder...

Of eternal shame.

Suggestions are to others as to me,

but I believe-- although I seem so loath--

I am the last that will last...

Break his oath.

Good boyet, you are not ignorant all-telling fame.

Doth noise abroad navarre hath made a vow...

Till painful study shall outwear three years,

no woman may approach his silent court.

Therefore, to us it seemeth a needful course,

before we enter his forbidden gates, to know his pleasure,

and in that behalf, bold of your worthiness,

we single you as our best-moving fair solicitor.

Tell him the daughter of the king of France,

on serious business, craving quick dispatch...

Importunes personal conference with his grace.

Proud of employment, willingly I go.

All pride is willing pride, and yours is so.

Who are the votaries, my loving maids,

that are vow-fellows with this virtuous Duke?

Lord longaville is one. Know you the man?

I know him, madam.

At a marriage feast in normandy saw I this longaville.

Who are the rest?

The young dumaine.

I saw him at the Duke alencon's once.

Another of these students at that time was there with him,

if I have heard a truth.

Berowne they call him.

God bless my ladies, are they all in love?

Here comes boyet! What admittance, lord?

Navarre had notice of your fair approach,

and he and his competitors in oath...

Were all addressed to meet you, gentle lady, before I came.

Marry, thus much have I learned.

He rather means to...

Lodge you... In the field.

Fair Princess, welcome to the court of navarre.

"Fair" I give you back again,

and welcome i have not yet.

The roof of this court is too high to be yours,

and welcome to the wide fields too base to be mine.

You shall be welcome, madam, to my court.

I will be welcome then. Conduct me thither.

Hear me, dear lady. I have sworn an oath.

Our lady, help my lord. He'll be forsworn.

Not for the world, fair madam, by my will.

Why, will shall break it.

Will and nothing else.

Your ladyship is ignorant what it is.

Were my lord so his ignorance were wise.

'Tis deadly sin to keep that oath, my lord,

and sin to break it.

Ahh! but pardon me. I am too sudden bold...

To teach a teacher ill beseemeth me.

Vouchsafe to read the purpose of my coming

and suddenly resolve me in my suit.

Madam, I will, if suddenly I may.

You will the sooner that I were away,

for you'll prove perjured if you make me stay.

Sir, I pray you, a word.

What lady is that same?

The heir of alencon-- mm-hmm.

Katherine her name.

A gallant lady!

Monsieur, fare you well. It's Katherine.

Ahem. I beseech you, a word.

What is she in the green?

A woman sometimes if by daylight she's seen.