Nine Lives

You think this is cute, don't you?

You think there's a real connection there.

So you feed it,

you dress it up.

But a cat doesn't care if you live or die

as long as someone gives it Friskies twice a day.

But people are so desperate for someone to hold onto

they'll take whatever they can get.

I found him on the street, months after the accident

and I dress him like Masao.

I know my son has come back to me in this cat.

But no matter how lonely you are,

a cat is not a person.

Okay. Super helpful, uh...

Oh, so marketing wants sign-off on the new billboard.

What do you think?

It might be a little heavy on the Photoshop.

Get me a real F-16.

We'll take some real pictures.

No, they said they don't have the budget for it.

Fire the marketing department!

You wanna fire the entire marketing department?

No. I wanna fly a real F-16. What's next?

I'm supposed to remind you,

Lara's left two messages.

Why is she calling?

Because she's your wife.

I put together some talking points

for your press conference.

How old are you again?

Twenty-eight.

That's how long I've been talking to the press.

I'll be fine.

Sir, we're ready.

Why don't you jump with me today?

Oh, yeah, no. I just had breakfast, so...

Come on!

Dad, I can't. I can't.

All right.

Chicken!

Good one, Dad.

Yeah!

Very nice, very nice!

Perfect landing.

Thank you.

Thank you very much. Thank you.

Good morning, everyone.

What an incredible view.

And I mean all of you that I get to look at this fine morning.

Thank you for coming.

Now, when we open this building

one month from today.

The FireBrand Tower will be the tallest building in North America.

And that means that we can finally move out of that dump

we've all been forced to work in all these years down the block.

Tell us about Chicago.

Mr. Brand, any comment on the Paragon Tower?

Oh, you mean that tin shack they're gluing together

over there in Chicago?

No. No comment on that.

Rumor is they're beating you by 60 feet.

Well, no. There's not a chance of that.

No, no. Look, I'd love to answer more questions,

but I gotta get back to the office.

All right. I wanna move fast here.

Have legal review this overnight.

They're all tied up with the tower.

Listen, I know we got to keep him happy,

but we can't let this building distract us from...

Why? You've got something better to do?

Oh.

How was the press conference?

Well, apparently it was a distraction.

I pulled some staff to explore a public offering.

I'm sorry. Did I ask you to sell my company?

Are we taking bids?

How much can we get for Gary?

We ran some rough numbers...

Yeah. Well, first, why is the press asking me about Chicago?

You're winning. Yours is bigger.

Well, finally there's our new slogan.

Where are we with the opening ceremony?

We're gonna rig the entire building with fireworks.

Oh, so, wait. When I cut the ribbon...

Fireworks go off.

Oh, my God. Ian, that is just spectacular,

you know, if we were doing a Fourth of July celebration

or a really rousing Oktoberfest.

Tom, we can't keep...

Look, we are just about to cap off

the tallest building in the Northern Hemisphere

and I can't brag about it if I don't own it.

Yeah.

This is the distraction.

Okay, everybody, let's pretend that that didn't just happen.

- What's that? - It's a surprise.

For my birthday?

- What are you watching? - Dad.

Did he tell you to record this?

No, but I just wanted to see him.

Look. Watch.

And that means that we can finally move out of that dump

we've all been forced to work in

all these years down the block.

How many times have you watched this?

Um...

Eighty-three.

And now it's 84.

We're worried about costs.

Well, that's why we call this a "Board meeting."

Please take a message.

- Tom, these are serious concerns. - I know.

- Look, I understand... - Lara Brand.

- Lara Brand. - Oh, no, go ahead. Just take it outside.

Ian, where's Tom? I can't get ahold of him.

I can't pry him away from the Board.

I wanna show you all that I take your concerns very seriously.

Our operating costs are up 30% from last quarter.

And my first concern is why is Ian coming at us with this IPO crap?

He's been with the Board all day?

It's hard to get Tom's attention.

Maybe I should join the Board.

Or you can take my job. Please.

Ian approached us with the idea.

He's put together a very attractive proposal.

A public offering means a big payday for all of us.

Now, we've sunk years of revenue into that building, Tom.

It's time to cash out.

Come on, we got plenty of cash, don't we?

And why?

Because we built airlines and retail chains and phone companies,

but no one is gonna remember any of those

because they keep changing hands.

But 100 years from now,

when people look out their windows and they see that tower,

they're gonna see the name "Brand"

and that's a name they will never forget.

And that is not something that I am willing to sell.

We're not running a charity for your ego, Tom.

Okay. Well, then instead, let's play a little game.

You know, just for the fun of it.

Raise your hand if your name is on the company letterhead.

- Tom... - No, no. Come on, we'll just call it a vote.

- Tom... - Fifty-one percent!

Feels good to win.

You can sell shares at my funeral.

And the next time Ian wants to play CEO,

we can fire him together.

- Hey, can I borrow you for a minute? - Not now.

It's about the tower.

I already talked to your dad about this. We're 100 feet taller.

I know that's the projection.

But that's printed to scale.

Chicago's beating us by 60.

Am I missing something here? We're taller.

There's too much steel in their roof.

So?

So that's rated for 760 tons, and there's nothing on it.

But if they laid that much steel...

They're not done.

No, that's not in their plans.

They know we have their plans.

They want us to think we're winning but they got a permit for that

and they are beating us by 60 feet.

David!

Right. Keep this quiet.

Oh, Ian, let's make that call to Madrid before they take their siesta.

Absolutely.

You know, we do have janitors.

- Yeah. I've been busy. - I got you something.

Ow!

Thanks, Dad.

I'm sorry to break up your dinner, but I need that report.

Well, tell your wife the check's on me.

Yeah, but she gets another anniversary next year.

I don't really care.

Oh, excuse me, have you seen my wife anywhere?

What does she look like?

She is the most beautiful woman in the entire world.

Oh, well, maybe I have seen her. Let me see.

Oh, here we go. Is this her?

Oh, let's give her a call.

Yeah, it was a busy day. What did I miss?

Uh, my birthday was last month.

You're joking me right now?

You're gonna have to give me more to work with than that.

- Oh, damn it. It's not today? - Tomorrow.

Oh, well, then I haven't missed it.

Father of the year.

So, what did we get her?

Oh, we didn't get her anything.

You were too busy to talk for five minutes, so I got her a makeup kit.

Oh, well, couldn't we say that the makeup kit's from both of us?

- No. - Fine.

What should I get her?

Maybe you should ask her what she wants.

Try getting to know her a little bit

before she heads off to college.

Come on. I still got seven years left.

Or, no, six years. I'm kidding.