Dope

(HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING ON STEREO)

Hip-hop hooray, ho

Hey, ho

I just read that money as we know it is dead.

Soon the world is only gonna buy and sell products using bitcoins.

It's like a complicated math equation.

So, one day we're gonna buy things

with numbers from a math equation?

Dope, right?

Malcolm Adekanbi is a geek.

Malcolm lives with his single mother

and has only one memory of his father.

(HIP-HOP MUSIC CONTINUES ON HEADPHONE)

Malcolm lives in Inglewood, California,

in the Darby-Dixon neighborhood referred to as the Bottoms.

You drew a picture of my morning but you couldn't make my day

I'm rockin' and you're yawnin' but you never look my way

I'm lickin' down your darlin' In every single way

Your funny flow is foreign And your green card's on the way

This ain't got to do with shampoo

But watch your head and shoulder

Brother, older, bold enough To fold ya, yo, I told ya

A raid, afraid of what I made and played it plus a funky fit

So save your flips And tricks for that music and the monkey bit

Give me your bike, nigga!

Malcolm's friends, Jib and Diggy, are also geeks.

Yo.

Shit.

All I want to do is a zoom, zoom, zoom and the boom, boom.

Word.

Malcolm, Jib and Diggy

are all deeply obsessed with '90s hip-hop culture,

submerging themselves in the music,

watching old Yo! MTV Raps episodes for fashion tips,

and using the slang.

Huh?

Bro, that shit was whack.

What?

They were biting Brand Nubian.

That's not even possible.

Ah, jackpot, niggas.

Gushy, gushy. Mmm.

Oh, did I mention that Diggy was a lesbian?

Although from the way she dresses,

you might not have noticed she's a girl.

Save her, Lord!

Yo, hallelujah! Hallelujah!

Every Sunday, her grandmother asks the church to lay their hands on her

in order to pray away the gay.

Praise the Lord!

(CONGREGATION SHOUTING AFFIRMATIONS)

So, did it work? -- You know.

I was watching Justin Bieber the other night

and I got a little moist.

Yeah? -- So maybe.

That's just because he's a little ho, though.

That's true.

He's a very pretty nigga. -- JIB: Yes, he is.

What's up, boss?

For most geeks, a bad day might be

being the butt of jokes in class,

the occasional food prank, and the worst, being beat up by a jock.

But when you live in the Bottoms,

a bad day might be accidentally getting killed.

Like Wytony Johnson,

who got shot buying a pastrami cheeseburger

from Jimmy's Burger on Centinela.

Hey! It's the Rollin 60s, dumb-ass niggas!

The real tragedy is,

that he was seconds away from defeating Ganon.

He had a hell of a comic book collection.

Jib has been trying to talk Wytony's mom into giving them to him

for the past two weeks.

Malcolm, Jib and Diggy don't play sports and they aren't in a gang.

They're always getting ridiculed by their peers

because they're into white shit,

like skateboards, manga comics, Donald Glover,

and for listening to white shit

like TrashTalk, TV On The Radio,

and for doing white shit

like getting good grades and applying to college.

Malcolm, Jib and Diggy used to be in the school marching band,

but quit in protest after refusing to play the Harlem Shake.

They arranged to use the music room during lunch

for their recently formed punk band, Awreeoh.

One, two. One, two, three, four!

Yeah

First day of school -- Hey!

Good grades are cool

Trying to find a new way to rule

And land a new major boo

My, my, is that why

Bumping young jeezy inside

I march to the beat of my own drum

And tomorrow don't care about the outcome

it's time to get live, live I mean fucking live

Adrenaline on overdrive -- Come on!

Life at home is hard to survive -- Come on, Jib!

Your friends come over to give you a ride

Hey! -- So hot, you could evaporate rain

So much anger but you don't feel the pain

Then you say, 'sup with this?

Storm out of the door and scream

Fuck this shit!

I won't act like a gangsta would

But no, you can't fuck with my hood

It seems that lately

Your homeboy's tried to play me

Stay acting shady

My ego might just make me

Go ahead

Make some noise

Go ahead

Make some noise Make some noise

Hey, hey! You know the program, niggas.

Shoe program. Turn around.

Let me see what the fuck you working with.

Oh, shit, man.

All these motherfuckers got small feet around this bitch.

God damn! Nigga, I don't know why you was looking.

Hey-hey! My nigga, my G.

Oh, man.

Where the fuck you goin', man?

God damn! What's up with you?

Hey, them last shoes you gave me, man, I was feeling them.

Classics. The Force 2s? Yeah, I was liking those.

What's these you got on?

Bro, these are straight from the flea market.

Shut the fuck up, nigga.

These the J3s, with the red mark on 'em.

Oh, yes.

Come up out those right now.

Right now, nigga! You speak English?

Do I gotta beat the shit out of you again and take them?

Damn.

This nigga's speaking African or some shit,

like he don't speak what we speak.

This nigga always...

Hey! -- (ALL SHOUTING)

Go, Dig! Come on!

Dig! Go!

Come on, Dig!

Oh, shit!

Hey, hey. Hold up, hold up.

Get your fuckin' hands off me, man!

Don't think I won't beat your ass, Marquis!

I came up with your daddy.

You better ask him about Stacey.

And see what's what around this motherfucker!

Let's go, man.

I'm gonna get the other one, you little, bitch-ass nigga.

Go, man.

Malcolm, when I see stuff like this personal essay,

I think you're not taking the process seriously.

I'm... I'm taking it seriously, Mr. Bailey. I promise.

I'm talking about something that I love.

I mean, it's well-reasoned, supported with historical data,

it shows creativity, critical thinking.

If Neil deGrasse Tyson was writing about Ice Cube,

this is what it would look like.

I suggest you go in a different direction.

Write something personal about you.

Your family, your life.

I mean, I... I could write about the typical,

"I'm from a poor, crime-filled neighborhood,

"raised by a single mother, don't know my dad..." blah-blah.

It's cliché.

This here, this, this is...

This is creative. This shows that I'm different.

This is the kind of essay

that Harvard wants from their students.

Malcolm, I'm gonna be honest with you.

You're pretty damn arrogant. You think you're gonna get into Harvard?

Who do you think you are, hmm?

You go to high school in Inglewood.

To the admissions committee, your straight A's, they don't mean shit.

If you're really serious about this exercise

and you're not just wasting my time,

or yours,

then it's gonna be about your personal statement,

your SAT scores, your recommendations.

And most importantly, your alumni interview tomorrow.

Are you ready?

I'm ready.

You'd better be.

I just found out you're interviewing with Austin Jacoby.

He's from Inglewood too,

so he'll be able to relate to your circumstances.

Jacoby Check Cashing?

Harvard? Really?

I'm sorry. They don't all go on to be president.

On this day,

their usual route home is blocked by a Blood gathering.

They were shooting a video for their YouTube channel.

Well, where do you want to go?

Some nigga really needs to invent an app

like Waze to avoid all these hood traps.

The only way to get home is down 104th street.

But that's where the dope dealers are,

who, for sport, routinely try to steal their bikes.