Aesthetica of a Rogue Hero (はぐれ勇者の鬼畜美学)

( puffing and panting )

- THANKS FOR THE VOTE OF CONFIDENCE. SENDING A WHOLE TEAM AFTER ME,

BUT I DOUBT YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO ACTUALLY KILL ME!

( explosions )

- KNOW WHAT? I TAKE THAT BACK.

I'M A LITTLE INSULTED THAT YOU THINK A COUPLE HUNDRED ARROWS

WOULD GET THE JOB DONE.

BULL'S EYE!

IMPOSSIBLE.

( theme song playing )

( singing in Japanese )

- WE DOING THIS THE EASY WAY OR THE HARD WAY?

- THE EASY WAY HAS YOU SAFE IN SOMEONE'S BED BEFORE SUNRISE.

Both: ANSWER CAREFULLY!

( both shout )

- OH, SCRUMPTIOUS LOOKING EARLOBE YOU GOT THERE.

( whimpers )

( exclaims )

- WELL, IF IT'S THAT IMPORTANT TO YOU.

- AKATSUKI! YOU ARE AN ABSOLUTE ROGUE!

BABY, YOU'VE GOT NO IDEA.

I'M KINDA LIKING THE PET NAME.

ADD "HERO" TO THAT, AND IT'S A DEAL.

REALLY? SURE HOPE YOU FIGHT BETTER THAN YOU HIDE, VALKYRIE.

( footsteps )

- I SHALL ASK YOU ONCE MORE, SIR KNIGHT.

RETURN WITH US TO THE PALACE,

SO THERE MAY BE AN END TO THIS.

- YOU REALLY KNOW HOW TO SEND A GUY OFF, I'LL GIVE YOU THAT MUCH.

HOT DAMN, LADIES, WISH THE MAID CAFES BACK HOME

HAD HALF THE FINE LOOKING TAIL I SEE RIGHT HERE.

- I TAKE IT FROM THAT COMMENT

YOU TRULY INTEND TO RETURN TO YOUR OWN REALM, AKATSUKI THE BRAVE?

HOW UNFORTUNATE.

DAMN HIM!

- AND THE FLOWERS ARE STILL STANDING!

CHILDISH TACTICS!

( she whimpers )

ON YOUR FEET, WARRIOR!

WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?

YOU SPRAIN YOUR ANKLES TRYING TO CATCH THE BOUQUET?

IT'S OKAY. MAYBE WE JUST ROLL DOWN THOSE STOCKINGS AND PLAY DOCTOR.

( maids scream nervously )

YOU LECHEROUS BASTARD.

I WAS WRONG TO ADDRESS YOU AS "KNIGHT."

HOW CAN YOU BE CALLED SUCH WHEN NO MAN WORTHY OF THE TITLE

WOULD LET TALES OF THIS LEWD BEHAVIOR TRAIL IN HIS WAKE?

- YOU DON'T THINK STORIES ABOUT WHIP-BRANDISHING,

MAN-HUNGRY MAIDS WOULD CATCH LIKE WILDFIRE?

- MY ORDERS COME FROM PRINCESS LISTY HERSELF.

YOU'RE NOT TO PASS THROUGH THE OTHERWORLD GATE.

I'M TO STOP YOU BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY.

- HER HIGHNESS IS JUST GONNA HAVE TO BE DISAPPOINTED.

READY YOURSELF!

- DONE AND DONE. BRING IT ON.

( rapid footsteps )

( swords clang )

( birds chirping )

- CLEARLY I UNDERESTIMATED YOUR GIFT FOR CATCHING THE FAIRER SEX OFF GUARD

IF YOU CAN TROUNCE VALKYRIE.

( she exclaims )

- THAT WAS A COMPLIMENT, I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW!

I DON'T DISPENSE THEM LIGHTLY!

YOU WILL ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR BETTER! AKATSUKI!

- SORRY, PRINCESS. I DON'T REALLY APPRECIATE

HAVING YOUR PARTY GALS UNLEASHED ON ME.

NO MATTER WHAT YOUR INTENTIONS WERE.

- DO YOU REALLY MEAN TO ABANDON THIS WORLD?

- I'VE KILLED A DARK LORD, SWEETHEART.

IF EVER THERE WAS A TIME TO DISAPPEAR, IT'S NOW.

I STICK AROUND, GARIUS' PALS, HIS ENEMIES, FOR THAT MATTER,

WILL BE FALLING ALL OVER THEMSELVES FOR A PIECE OF ME.

DON'T FORGET, I'M NOT FROM AROUND HERE.

I'M ON MY OWN WHEN THINGS GET UGLY. THINK ABOUT IT.

TRUTH IS, EVEN IF I WERE FREE AND CLEAR OF THIS SIDE OF THE GATE,

I'VE GOT OBLIGATIONS BACK HOME.

I DON'T WANT YOU TO GO.

WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS? YOU ROGUE!

- ONLY THING I COULD THINK OF TO DO TO STOP THE WATERWORKS.

KINDA WHAT I DO.

- ONE DOES NOT SIMPLY STEAL A KISS FROM THE LIPS OF ROYALTY!

SUCH LIBERTIES COME DEAR!

- LOOK, I'M NOT A REALLY COMPLICATED GUY.

THINK OF ME EVERY NOW AND THEN WHEN I'M GONE

AND THAT'LL BE PAYMENT ENOUGH.

YOU INCORRIGIBLE VAGABOND!

I'LL THINK OF YOU WHEN I CHANCE TO LOOK UPON A CRIMINAL!

AH, FLATTERY.

REALLY WISH I WAS AS GOOD AT FARE-THEE-WELL AS YOU ARE, BABE.

BUT, YOU KNOW MY RIDE'S HERE, SO I PROBABLY BETTER GET GOING.

GOOD RIDDANCE, AKATSUKI!

I'D WISH YOU A SAFE VOYAGE, BUT...

I HALF WISH YOU'LL CATCH YOUR DEATH ON THE WAY. GET THEE GONE.

- JUST SO YOU KNOW, I STILL MEAN WHAT I SAID THAT DAY.

IF YOU EVER NEED ME FOR ANYTHING,

CALL ME AND I'M THERE.

ALL I'M ASKING FOR IS A LITTLE GOOD FAITH.

IF WE HAVE TRUST, IT DOESN'T MATTER THAT WE'LL BE WORLDS APART.

YOU KNOW THAT.

HEY! I'M ALWAYS GONNA BE THERE FOR YOU, OKAY?

ALL RIGHTY, THEN.

HMMM. I WONDER IF SHE'D MIND A FRIENDLY SQUEEZE.

I MEAN, COME ON. BE GOOD.

WAKEY-WAKEY. HOW YOU FEELING?

OH, HEY! SO, YOU'RE NOT ALL MANGLED. THAT'S A PLUS.

( Miu screams )

- OKAY, FIRST OF ALL, TRY NOT TO FREAK.

I REALIZE THIS IS PROBABLY A SITUATION BEYOND YOUR UNDERSTANDING,

BUT LET'S TRY TO STAY COOL.

- THEN QUIT LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT!

- SECOND OF ALL, THIS IS MY HOUSE, MY WORLD.

- Akatsuki: YOU'RE IN GOOD HANDS. - WAIT, WHERE AM I?

AND, IF I'M IN GOOD HANDS, WHY AM I NAKED?

- SIDE EFFECT OF CROSSING DIMENSIONAL BARRIERS.

LOOK, MORE ON ALL THAT STUFF LATER.

WHAT DO YOU SAY WE INTRODUCE OURSELVES?

AKATSUKI OUSAWA. FRIENDS CALL ME AKATSUKI.

IN YOUR HOME WORLD OF ALAYZARD,

THE LADIES USED TO SPIN YARNS ABOUT ME BEING SOME KIND OF ROGUE HERO

OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

WHAT'S YOUR NAME?

- WELL, I... I GUESS YOU CAN CALL ME MIU.

( she sighs )

- Akatsuki: THESE GUYS DON'T MESS AROUND.

I'VE BEEN BACK JUST OVER A DAY AND THEY'RE ALREADY UP OUR BUTTS.

YOU REMEMBER OUR STORY, RIGHT?

YOUR NAME'S MIU OUSAWA AND YOU'RE TOTALLY MY LONG LOST LITTLE SISTER.

I FINALLY FOUND YOU.

WE REUNITED IN ALAYZARD,

WHERE I'D BEEN SINCE VANISHING FROM MY BEDROOM WHEN I WAS A LITTLE GIRL.

- AND, AFTER WE FINALLY RECOGNIZED EACH OTHER,

WE CAME BACK HOME THROUGH THE OTHERWORLD GATE.

ANYBODY PRODS YOU FOR MORE INFORMATION THAN THAT,

JUST TELL THEM YOU'VE GOT AMNESIA.

DOWNCAST EYES ARE THE MARK OF A TERRIBLE LIAR.

WHEN YOU WALK INTO A ROOM,

ACT LIKE YOU OWN THE PLACE, OR THEY'LL CATCH ON.

BUCK UP. TRY STICKING THAT CHEST OUT.

( Miu yells )

- Female voice: THE SUMMONING SYNDROME AND YOU, AN OVERVIEW.

WHILE THE BEST MINDS OF THREE GENERATIONS HAVE YET TO FIND AN EXPLANATION

FOR THIS STARTLING PHENOMENON,

ITS EFFECTS ARE WELL DOCUMENTED.

THIRTY YEARS AGO, YOUNG PEOPLE ACROSS THE GLOBE,

BEGAN DISAPPEARING FROM OUR WORLD,

SUMMONED TO DIMENSIONS ONLY IMAGINED IN THE ANNALS OF FANTASY.

CURRENT ESTIMATES PUT THE NUMBER OF SUMMONED IN THE THOUSANDS.

THESE OTHER DIMENSIONS CONTAIN PORTALS,

KNOWN AS OTHERWORLD GATES,

THROUGH WHICH A "SUMMONED" CAN RETURN HOME,

THOUGH TO DATE ONLY ABOUT HALF HAVE MANAGED TO REACH THEM.

AMONG THOSE WHO'VE RETURNED,

MANY HAVE BEEN DISCOVERED TO POSSESS UNIQUE,

OCCULT-BASED FIGHTING TECHNIQUES ACQUIRED WHILE AWAY.

TECHNIQUES INFINITELY USEFUL IN OUR WORLD.

( she exclaims )

- Female voice continues: MAGICAL ABILITIES, AS YOU MIGHT IMAGINE,

ARE ESPECIALLY INTERESTING TO US.

TO HELP RE-ACCLIMATE THOSE EFFECTED BY THE SUMMONING SYNDROME,

THE NEW UNITED NATIONS HAS ESTABLISHED AN AUTONOMOUS STATE,

WHERE THESE YOUNG PEOPLE CAN THRIVE,

GUIDED BY CUTTING EDGE SCIENCE TO HARNESS THEIR POWERS

TO THE GREATER BENEFIT OF HUMANKIND.

AND BECOME FINE, UPSTANDING MEMBERS OF SOCIETY.

AS WELL AS POTENTIAL HEROES.

AS ONE OF THE SUMMONED,

YOU HAVE BEEN SINGLED OUT FOR THE PRIVILEGE OF ENROLLMENT INTO BABEL,

OUR STATE-OF-THE-ART TRAINING FACILITY,

DESIGNED TO HELP YOU FINE-TUNE THE ABILITIES ACQUIRED

DURING YOUR TIME ABROAD.

WELCOME, AND GOOD LUCK!

- SURE. "FOR THE PRIVILEGE OF ENROLLMENT."

MORE LIKE THE PRIVILEGE OF BEING DRAGGED OUT OF BED

AT THE ASS CRACK OF DAWN.

OH, AND LET'S NOT FORGET BEING QUARANTINED

FROM EVERYTHING YOU KNOW AND LOVE. THESE PEOPLE.