The Devil's Candy

Raymond!

Raymond!

Ray? Sweetie?

Ah, I play it loud.

Like, I can't hear him.

Pack your things, you're going back to the hospital.

I'm calling Daddy and he is taking you back.

- (DOOR SHUTS) - (EERIE WHISPERS)

Mom said you have to hurry.

- Hey. - Is that the thing for the bank?

Yeah. Yeah, that's a commission.

Butterflies? So not metal.

I know, I know, I agree. But most people don't like metal.

Most people's taste is in their...

Have you not showered yet? We're late.

Guys, can we listen to something just a little bit less heavy?

- Metallica? - (LAUGHS)

I'm not sure that's what your mom had in mind.

Wow. It's gorgeous.

Lived in Texas my whole life.

It's always been hot but, well...

even Satan's praying for it to rain.

As y'all can see, everything's true to the turn of the century period.

Yeah, I... I love this wallpaper.

- Special, ain't it? - Yeah.

And through here, north facing, double hung windows.

Sunlight streaming in.

I'm not one for flowery words, but tranquil comes to mind.

Zo, this is twice the size of the room that you have right now.

Have fun, you're not gonna see any of them with all the posters that you have.

If there's even one teddy left...

you have to buy me some more.

- Okay? - Yeah. Of course.

Could make a mighty fine bedroom for a teenager down the track.

When she's ready for some space of her own.

This is gonna be Daddy's studio.

Or a studio. Yes, indeed.

Okay. By law I have to fess up to any death in the house.

And in this case there were two.

Um, sweetie...

I had left my bag in the car and it's got some documents I need.

- If you want me to leave, just ask. - Okay.

And now you can't sell it which is why the price is so low.

Next showings at eleven, got 'em lined up all day.

Folks love a bargain.

After all, what are we talking about here?

A sweet little old lady who accidentally fell down the stairs...

and her dear old hubby who couldn't stand to live without her.

Sad, indeed...

but it's not like Charlie Manson lived here.

Can you give us a minute, please?

Thank you.

- You don't find it creepy? - What?

- The couple? - Yeah.

No.

No, I actually think it's really romantic.

He loved her so much he couldn't live another day without her.

- You just want this studio. - What? No.

- I'm not even thinking about this. - (CHUCKLING)

- Can you hear that? - What? What?

- Wait. (SHUSHING) - What do you mean, what?

That right there. (WHISPERING) Astrid...

Jesse...

- You can't hear that? - No, I can't hear that. What is it?

Buy me.

You don't hear that? 'Cause it's screaming at me.

I can't ignore it.

Can I help you?

Zo's gonna have to change schools.

She'll be alright, she's a brave kid.

It's like two buses for me to get to the salon.

Not if we get a second car.

You have to do more commissions. We just... we cannot do this on my salary alone.

I mean, rent is one thing but this is a serious mortgage.

I know, Astrid, why do you think I'm painting fucking butterflies for a bank...

even though it makes me want to puke?

Astrid, please, chill.

Alright. Here.

Please just... just take a hit. Okay?

Exhale.

Good.

Close your eyes.

Close your eyes.

Repeat after me...

- ...we just bought a house. - (LAUGHING)

- "We just bought a house." - Yeah!

And it's a beautiful fucking house.

- "And it is a beautiful fucking house." - Yeah.

We're gonna be happy.

"We're going to be happy."

'Cause we never have to look at that view ever again.

Come here.

County Sheriff's office, open up. - (KNOCKING ON DOOR)

Can you open up a little so I can see?

Uh...

You know why I'm here?

I got a call about some loud music.

What's your name?

Ray.

You gonna help us both out and keep quiet, Ray?

Yeah.

Let me hear you say it.

I'm gonna help us both out and keep quiet.

Good. I don't want to have to come back.

If I come back...

I got no choice but to give you citation or ticket...

or worse, place you under arrest.

- I'd much rather not. - (EERIE WHISPERS CONTINUES)

It's never as bad as you think.

Seriously, you just tough out the first 30 minutes and then the rest is gravy.

I hate gravy.

Alright, go forth, brave soldier.

Don't let your schooling get in the way of your education, alright?

Yeah. I love you, Dad.

- (CAR DOOR SLAMS) - (BIRDS CHIRPING)

Hey, Zo.

- (ZOOEY SCREAMS) - Oh, my God. (SIGHS)

- (CHUCKLES) Zooey. - I haven't gotten you that good in ages.

Yeah, that was hysterical. That was super funny.

- Thank you. - (CHUCKLES)

How was your first day?

Sucked big time.

Hey, hey.

It'll get better, I promise.

Okay, it just takes time. Yeah, anything new, it just takes time.