Ride the High Country

It's true. I am a Hulk.

Let me get you up to speed.

Look out!

What happened to me?

Jen, I'm sorry,

but my blood got into your system.

So I turn into a Hulk now, too.

We have to make sure of your ability to regulate your emotions,

especially your anger.

Fine. Teach me how to Hulk.

So I'm clearly nailing it at all these things,

and I'm happy to now get back to my life.

Whether you like it or not, you're now a superhero.

The idea of being a superhero is not appealing to me.

And that's how it all happened.

I was right and Bruce was wrong.

And I never have to be a Hulk.

You need to do your thing.

Right now? In front of everybody?

Who the hell are you?

Jennifer Walters, attorney at law.

The aftermath of this chaos,

a new superhero appears responsible for stopping the rampage...

Sketches show a stunning scene from the Metropolitan Courthouse today,

where superpowered influencer Titania caused panic while fleeing traffic court.

In the aftermath of the chaos,

a new superhero appears responsible for stopping the rampage.

And she's been identified as Deputy District Attorney Jennifer Walters.

Members of the jury are calling the green woman

a hero who saved lives.

We go live now to an eyewitness.

Can you tell us about what you saw today?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So this chick,

pretty decent,

turned into a Hulk, like a chick-Hulk.

A She-Hulk?

Exactly.

She-Hulk! She-Hulk! She-Hulk!

That's for you.

No. No.

That's for somebody called She-Hulk,

which can't be what they're calling me.

Lady-Hulk, Girl-Hulk, She-Hulk... Come on, just give them what they want.

She-Hulk! She-Hulk! She-Hulk!

That name better not stick.

It's so dumb.

I can't even exist without being a derivative of the Hulk.

That's a pretty dumb name, too.

Mmm-hmm.

Neat little trick you pulled there, Walters.

But isn't it unsportsmanlike

to suddenly debut superpowers just to drum up publicity for yourself?

Only you would think that.

- Seriously, how did you get powers? - I don't feel like talking about it.

Nepotism. I knew it.

Ugh. Take a lap, Dennis.

There's a hot chick over there. I'm gonna go talk to it.

Some guy gave me these drinks for free because you're a superhero.

Ugh! I'm not.

No, I did not go to law school and rack up six figures in student loans

to become a vigilante.

That is for billionaires and narcissists,

and adult orphans, for some reason.

But you could be an Avenger.

Do the Avengers offer healthcare?

- I think... - Maternity leave, a pension.

Are they even paid?

Here's the thing, though. Hulk Jen is a total snack.

- Right? - Jen, can I talk to you for a moment?

Of course, sir. What is it?

Could you, uh, go back to Jen-Jen?

This is a serious conversation.

Oh. Sure.

Oh!

- Are you okay? - Yeah.

Yeah, different metabolism.

I'm listening, sir.

We didn't win the case.

- Oh, yeah, we did. - No.

GLK and H had it declared a mistrial because you as your...

What... She-Hulk...

That is not what I call it. Me.

I don't have a better name yet, but that's not it.

Okay, well, just the same.

Since you saved the lives of the entire jury today,

GLK and H argued that the jury was then biased in your favor.

What was I supposed to do?

Like, let them get hit in their faces with a desk

and then they have trauma, and they're bleeding out all over the courtroom...

No, you did the right thing, but it unraveled our case.

- I'm sorry, Jen. - Oh.

I'm sorry, too, boss.

No, Jen, I'm sorry. I have to let you go.

This makes you a liability for the DA's office.

Wait.

Wait, you're firing me?

This is Jen. Leave a message.

Hey, Fuzzball, just checkin' in on you.

I'm here if you wanna talk a little bit more.

No gloating this time, I promise.

Maybe a little.

We can't hire a lawyer

who is such a big distraction in court.

We're not prepared to offer you the position at this time.

Sorry, it's a no.

We just can't take the risk of a sideshow.

No, you can't work here. They don't have good snacks.

Mmm. Here, GG and T might be hiring.

Uh-huh.

- Jen. - What?

Jen, what are you doing? Eye on the prize.

Come on. Seriously.

Sorry. I'm sad and lonely.

Jen.

No.

What? Fired again?

No.

- Family dinner right after I get fired. - Sorry.

Please, please, please, come with me.

Can't. I have a date.

I'll never forgive you for this.

Mom, Dad, I'm here.

- Hiya, sweetheart. - Hi.

- Yeah. There you go. - A pie.

You shouldn't have.

You know, this much sugar is very bad for you and your waistline.

Jen, you don't have to worry about getting fired.

I already told everyone, so it won't be awkward.

No one is going to bring it up.

- Hi, everybody. - Hi, Jen.

You got fired.

- Ched! - Ched!

You said to bring it up.

I said don't bring it up.

- Why would I tell you to bring it up? - Sorry, Uncle Mel.

She already feels like complete crud.

It's okay, Dad.

I, yes, got fired, but it's fine.

Big news. So I got promoted to manager over at the Best Buy.

Manager? All right.

Employed and promoted.

Oh! Jen, there is the nicest young man

who works at the coffee shop that I go to. Yusuf.

- Do not set me up. - No, he's much too young for you.

No. He wants to be a superhero,

and I told him that my daughter was a superhero.

He hadn't heard of you.

But I gave him your number so that he could call you for advice.

Please stop giving my number out to strangers.

Uh, Jen, that Hawkeye guy,

what happens to those arrows of his?

I mean, does he go around and collect them when he's done...

- Jenny. - Nobody calls me that.

I'll just put this out there. Melanie is a stylist. You know?

She could help you.

- Let's get this hair more like She-Hulk's. - Mmm-hmm.

So back to Hawkeye.

It's pretty hazardous to leave those things lying around.

Add some chunky highlights, some chunky lowlights?

Bruce is actually the one who saved billions of people

- with the snap of his fingers. - Now, Jen,

there's a couple of things I could use your help with before you go.

What do you need me to do, Dad?

That was just an excuse to check in with you.

How you doin', kiddo?

- I'm okay. - Really?

No, I'm not okay. But I'm okay with not being okay.

- Uh-huh. - Because it just sucks.

You know, like I thought I could keep this at bay

for I don't know how long.

- Eternity? - Well...

But it's just like, I hate that it got revealed in this way,

like, in front of the whole world.

But I wasn't gonna let those people get hurt.

- No. - What kind of person would that make me?

I'm being punished for doing the right thing.

I get fired for saving people,

and now I can't get another job because of it.

You didn't tell me.

What were those years of law school even for?

Well...

Maybe I should've just let those people get smooshed.

Sweetheart, sweetheart, sweetheart, it's gonna be okay.

This isn't even the first time we've had to deal with a Hulk in the family.

And you didn't destroy a city.

It does feel like a weight has been lifted.

But there's, like, this new weight.

The thing that you were dreading happened.

But look, you're still standing.

And now you get to keep moving on.

You want another one, Jen?

No, I'm ballin' on a budget now.

Thanks, Pedro.

Miss Walters? It's nice to see you again.

Mr. Holliway?

May I buy you a drink?

Uh... Sure. I guess.

Can I help you?

I'd like to offer you a job.

- Is this a joke? - I never joke.