NCIS

Every body has a story to tell.

Now although this gentleman died a natural death,

he gave his cadaver

to further your education,

so pay careful attention to what he has to tell us.

Now, the brain.

Inside,

you will see the delicate structures and pathways

that determine memories, emotions, basic motor functions.

In sum,

who we are.

Mr. Palmer would you

cradle the brain while I sever this...?

Lieutenant Greer, the four...

lobes of the cerebrum?

It's the frontal,

the parietal,

occipital

and temporal.

The adult human brain weighs approximately three pounds.

Feels like a soggy grapefruit.

Yes. Well, pass it around.

Now, don't let its small size fool you.

The cerebral cortex contains one

billion neurons and one

million billion connections, or synapses.

If you were to count one synapse per second,

you wouldn't finish counting for 32 million years.

Doctor,

is this natural?

Certainly not.

What the hell is that?

This, my dear lieutenant...

is murder.

Team-NCIS presents:

NCIS Season 5 Episode 4 Identity Crisis (Version LOL V1.0)

Corrections : Kom1dune and Magic Turtle.

Not bad.

And look at this one. You're going to love this guy.

Yeah, he would not be safe with me. I would eat him.

He's so adorable. How can you say no to that face?

Please tell me you're looking for a man for Ziva.

Not me.

McGoo, is there something you want to tell me?

Looking at animal rescue sites.

McGee's thinking about getting a puppy.

Puppy's a lot of work.

You got to feed it, walk it, train it.

Yeah. I'm not 12, all right?

I work hard. I deserve someone who will

jump up all excited when I get home, you know?

Lay on the couch, watch TV.

Maybe lick my face a little bit.

Might be easier getting a girlfriend.

Which might even be easier with a puppy.

Even for you.

I'm not ready to start taking tips from you on this yet, probie.

Tony, I think it's time you get back on that horse.

- Are you getting a pony? - It's an adage.

I am not familiar with that breed.

Yeah, well, they are quite rare.

Sort of a cross between a Pegasus and a unicorn.

- So, who's the favorite? - The Pit Bull.

Yeah, that makes sense for you, actually.

Not really for McGee.

He's more of a...

Spaniel kind of guy.

Cocker, maybe?

How about an Australian Shepherd?

They're working dogs.

- Pick it up, DiNozzo. - On it, boss.

A.F.I.P. Smooth things over.

Please hold.

What did we do to incur the wrath of the Armed Forces Institute of Pathology?

Ducky kept one of their cadavers.

Ducky stole a cadaver?

I'm sure he had a good reason.

I hope so.

Sit.

Stay.

Roll over.

It's absolutely ridiculous, Jethro.

This man's body should never have been donated to science.

Too late for a refund.

He was murdered, Jethro,

with an injection of mercury into his brain. A liquid bullet.

Mr. Palmer is presently endeavoring to reach

the M.E. who made such a grievous oversight.

- Still no answer, Doctor. - Then redial, Mr. Palmer.

Yes.

Unidentified African-American male,

approximately 50 years old

blood-alcohol level zero point one-two.

Official cause of death: asphyxiation from the deceased's own vomit.

However, here's the kicker.

They elected not to perform an autopsy.

But it would be pretty hard to find a pinprick hole in the base of a skull.

And heavy metals wouldn't show on a tox screen

unless you're looking for them,

specifically.

Mr. Palmer, do not defend the inefficiency of others.

I'm not sure you can just take control of a body, Duck.

Well, someone has to.

I mean, based on preliminary findings, County Police

determined that he was a nameless drifter.

A John Doe.

Had too much to drink and died in his sleep.

Some people live their whole lives off the grid.

No, not our man.

I'd wager that he spent several years in prison.

Yeah, it's elementary, my dear Jethro.

The proliferation of scar tissue on his body.

Cigarette-sized burns.

Our John Doe led a violent life.

Yes, well, this long scar on his left leg is surgical.

However, it healed poorly.

Suggests prison-caliber medical treatment.

Especially post-operative.

And the tattooing.

Pen ink. Jailhouse style.

Yes. Perhaps we can get Abby to shed some light on this pattern.

It's her area of expertise.

A John Doe. I mean, it's ridiculous.

It can't be that difficult to locate a prison record.

Somebody must actually care that this man is dead

Well?

Did you locate the M.E.?

No. I gave up.

There in lies the problem.

People are just not willing to do the legwork.

He had a murder victim right in front of him,

classroom full of military students.

I think he might be a bit embarrassed.

Excellent detective work.

I hope your opinion of me doesn't waver after I've given this fellow

- a piece of my mind. - Never.

I warn you, this might get ugly.

I'm looking for Dr. Jordan Hampton.

You found her.

Is there something wrong with your telephone?

Wouldn't know. I don't answer it.

Too many bodies, and not enough time.

Special Agent Gibbs,

Dr. Donald Mallard. NCIS.

Pleasure. I assume you're not here to check on my phone.

Perhaps you'd have a moment to discuss a John Doe that

crossed your table nine days ago.

Remember the body?

Yeah, I remember every body.

50 something, black male found

DOA on Highland Pier. Aspirated on his own vomit.

I assume you kept him the requisite 72 hours.

No one made any inquiries.

Day two of his stay, I caught a priority triple homicide.

Day four, Anatomy Board picked him up.

You needed the space.

Not a whole lot of elbow room.

Where he went after that, I can't say.

A.F.I.P., and then, our autopsy suite.

We're investigating his death as a homicide.

Damn it.

I missed something.

An injection of mercury into his brain

in between the first vertebrae and the occipital bone.

Police tried

and failed to ID him.

AFIS database and dental record searches: they came up empty.

- DNA? - I'm not sure how it goes at NCIS,

around here, that takes about six months.

Never canvassed the scene.

Sadly, most cops I know, they prefer to hear,

"case closed" than look for a reason to open one.

It's not the first time

someone's slipped through the cracks.

Well, I'm glad you caught him, Dr. Mallard.

As am I.

Yeah, I hope she recovers from that tongue-lashing.

What do you find under the pier?

85 cents, two batteries and a bottle cap.

- No mercury, no needle. - Keep looking.

Got to find someone who knew him.

Highland Beach in October.

How much of a tourist draw.

Soft-shell crab season's almost over.

People really like boats that much?

You work for the Navy, DiNozzo.

Maybe we should start with this waitress.

Eating or asking questions?

If you were hoping for subtle, you could have lost the guns.

Or least the hats.

Excuse me.

I'd just like to show you a photo, see if you recognize this man.

Okay.

You trying to build suspense?

No.

It's just that the man in the photo is dead, and...

some people find that shocking.

Thanks for being gentle.

I'm a gentle man.

- Seen him? - Never seen him.