NCIS

Yes, I'm almost there.

Hmm... another half hour.

Relax.

Everything's going according to plan.

I've been to the Smithsonian,

Mount Vernon,

and a dreadful abomination called Foamhenge.

If anybody's following me,

they'll think I'm just sightseeing.

We're good.

Foamhenge?

Yes, it's an actual replica of Stonehenge,

except it's all made out of foam.

Pure disaster.

Just when you think

you've seen everything...

Oh, dear.

== sync, corrected by elderman == @elder_man

Burton Moore was born in 1977 in a small town in Wyoming.

He received a BS in geology from the University of Wisconsin.

Then spent almost a decade in the Peace Corps

before moving to DC.

Record?

He was arrested once.

Oh...

But for protesting a zoo

that was accused of abusing their animals.

Oh! Uh-huh.

We also have his yearly salary,

favorite bands,

and his political positions

on everything from the Middle East

to Middle Earth.

Which he's a big fan of, by the way.

I can hang with Middle Earth.

Oh, Code McBlue, Code McBlue, Code McBlue.

It's a purple grommet. Yeah. Hmm.

What's going on?

Nothing. Nothing.

That's the park ranger that was here a few weeks ago.

Oh, yeah. Mmm... yeah.

Are these two doing background for you?

It totally looks like that, huh?

Places of residence,

political contributions...

shoe size-- that's a myth, by the way.

No, it's not.

Size 12.

Abby, you don't have to hide this from me.

I'm not jealous. I have a girlfriend, remember?

Oh, I wasn't worried that you were jealous.

Good.

It's the overprotective big brother routine

that's getting old.

I'm not not overprotective.

Okay. So, I can date him?

Absolutely not, you don't know a thing about this guy.

Aside from this totally comprehensive background check.

But that's something you two can get into a lot of trouble for.

Trouble for what?

Data in that file is straight from the Internet, Boss.

Yeah, we didn't use a single law enforcement database.

McGee, it's the overprotective big brother routine

that's getting old.

Gear up!

Got a car blast in Virginia.

You know, he's just really not right for...

Go.

So, truck driver saw the fire, called 911.

Any witness?

Cops found fresh tire tracks over there.

Looks like a second vehicle was parked.

Why didn't they call 911?

Um... did I get here before you?

Got here before us. What'd we miss?

And don't spare the details.

I'm writing an abstract

on thermal trauma,

and can use some inspiration.

You first, Duck.

Victim appears to be of advanced age.

On first glance, I would say

he was ejected from the car in the explosion.

Was he in the Navy?

Don't know, still waiting on an e-mail back

with the vehicle registration.

Why was NCIS called?

'Cause of this.

Police found it hidden under the spare in the trunk.

Which is probably why it survived.

What is it?

Troop deployment orders.

What's he doing with those?

I'm sorry, did I get here before you?

I got that vehicle information.

It's a rental registered to an Angus Clarke.

Oh, I knew an Angus Clarke growing up.

Yeah, he lived on a beautiful tree-lined street.

Came from a wealthy family in, uh...

Beaconsfield?

Yes. In fact...

Six-one-two-three...

Clifford Avenue.

Duck, who was Angus Clarke?

My best friend.

When we were kids, we used to play a game

called “What's the Time, Mister Wolf?”

You would know it as “tag.”

To say I enjoyed it immensely would be an understatement.

In fact, I don't think I've enjoyed anything as much since.

How long has it been, Duck?

Too long.

You don't need to do this.

We can get somebody else.

No, we can't.

When Kate was taken from us,

and Director Shepard, Mike Franks...

their autopsies were all I had left of them.

If I wasn't willing to give up those last moments with them,

I'm sure as hell not now.

I already washed the body and logged the superficial wounds.

Thank you.

And I took X-rays, including dental,

to verify the identity.

Thank you again.

Doctor, I do have one more question.

What happens when frogs park illegally?

Excuse me?

Never mind.

I looked up a couple of jokes before you got here.

I thought it might help cheer you up.

It's a thought I'm regretting right now.

What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get... toad.

Yeah, well, let's...

start the autopsy.

I couldn't agree more.

Now, wait a minute.

You sure these were taken of him? Yes.

I took 'em myself. Give me that.

Oh...

This gentleman

has both his original central incisors.

Is that a problem? Angus didn't.

This isn't Angus!

His two front teeth were replaced by dental implants

after they were knocked out in a fight.

Are you sure? Yes.

I was the one that knocked them out.

Train now arriving on platform five,

317 for K Street. Platform five...

The one month, unlimited rides across the continent.

Oh, lucky you.

Well, last thing I'm going to need is your name.

Donnie Mallard, and I'm somewhat in a hurry, sir.

Mallard! Like the Mallard Song of Oxford!

Sung once a century at a special ceremony.

I remember when I was a child...

Sir...

My father used to talk about the first ceremony, oh, in 1901.

My pass, please.

Led by Cosmo Lang.

Sorry. Coming through. Most people don't realize...

I'm so sorry, sir-- this man's a doctor,

and he's needed in surgery immediately.

My apologies, and thank you for the fascinating insight.

Thank you. Thank you. Bloody hell.

I thought the old sod would never shut up.

What are you doing here? Well, Father gave me the night off.

Thought I might take you to dinner

before you disappear tomorrow. Ah, I've already eaten.

Oh, dear. Well, I suppose we'll just have to get plastered then.

Works for me.

So, when do you report for basic training?

30 days-- as soon as I get back from my trip.

So, what I want to know is,

why does somebody spend all that time

learning to be a doctor,

and then he signs up to Royal Army Medical Corps?

'Cause not all of us are set to inherit

the family fortune when we grow up.

Speaking of which, gonna have to go past Daddy's hotel.

I left my wallet there.

Forget it. Forget what?

I know what you're up to. It is as plain as a pikestaff.

What am I up to? You clearly have arranged

some sort of surprise going-away party

and are trying to lure me to the location

knowing full well that I despise surprise parties.

Ah. Now, you see, I knew I wouldn't be able

to lure you to the hotel, so, um...

Surprise!

You hear the good news?

Our victim is not Ducky's best friend.

Well, that's good news for Ducky's best friend.

I was trying to look at the positive.

And the DNA sample that Jimmy gave me.

And, then, hopefully, we can find out

whose bestie this guy is.

I was able to identify