The Scapegoat

You intend to stay long in france, mr. Barratt?

I didn't know there was any restriction,

Apart from money.

I thought you might have forgotten

Your passport expires next month.

No, i hadn't forgotten. Thank you.

You have nothing to declare.

Nothing.

Nothing whatever.

Nothing to declare.

You can't declare an emptiness in the heart.

What would he think of me if i'd said,

"Only a few personal belongings and a blank life"?

A madman at the worst,

A self-Pitying eccentric at the best.

Oh, i dread the holidays,

Although i've spent them always in the france i love so well-

A teacher of the french language

Who has no idea what he's looking for.

Jacques!

Back at last.

I'm afraid there's some mistake.

How was paris?

Villain.

All right, as you wish.

Seek, and you shall find.

Knock, and it will be opened unto you.

It seems i have knocked, and the door has remained shut.

God wants me no more than man.

And yet,

I don't quite believe that.

I don't behave differently,

Nor do i look so different from other men.

If i did, why should that man in the market square

Mistake me for someone else?

A lonely man dramatizes life for himself.

I must learn not to do that.

Nothing in the past to be particularly ashamed of,

Nothing in the future.

Perhaps a man has to be empty

Before he can be used.

Used for what?

God knows.

A cognac, please.

One moment, sir.

Madame.

Thank you. Wait.

Give that to the gentleman, please.

Yes, madame.

The lady asked me to give you this, sir.

One moment, sir.

There being nobody to introduce us,

One of us must break the silence.

There are two of us.

Undoubtedly. Look.

Gentlemen.

In view of this coincidence,

May a stranger offer you a drink?

A comparative stranger,

I suppose we should say.

Oh, charming.

Don't you think?

Most interesting.

What will you drink, brother?

Cognac.

Two cognacs- Twin cognacs.

Do you think we'll grow up to look like them?

It seems simpler to let ourselves be taken for twins

Than try to explain what we ourselves do not understand.

Do not understand, indeed.

You couldn't, perhaps, be the devil?

No.

I didn't think you could be.

I thought i'd better make sure.

Could you, perhaps?

I'm afraid not.

It's nothing as simple as that.

With the compliments of the little ones.

No. Cognac. Don't you think?

Oh, i think so. Yes.

I never drank much at home,

But this is rather an occasion, isn't it?

It is, rather.

Heaven knows the odds against such an encounter.

Enormous.

Large.

Astronomical.

And not worth the trouble.

To astronomy.

I haven't laughed so much for years,

Not since...

I can't remember when.

In fact, looking back,

It almost seems i never laughed at home.

How odd.

Not really. There's very little to laugh about

In the common room at a provincial university.

I didn't mean that was odd.

Twice, talking about things at home,

You've spoken in the past tense.

You just said, "i never laughed."

Before that, "i never drank."

Did i?

I wasn't conscious of it.

I suppose i feel about it in the past tense.

Aren't you planning to go back?

I don't know.

I'm not planning not to.

I'm just not planning.

It would make no difference, really, if i didn't.

For a term or so in the common room,

In the middle of that dreary red-Brick arguing,

Someone might say, "i wonder what's become of barratt."

And soon it would be,

"I wonder what became of barratt."

My landlady would look after my cat.

She's largely alienated its affections already.

Traitorous animals, cats.

You're not married?

No, the situation... never arose.

I thought once it might,

But it didn't.

Relatives?

Some second cousins in westmoreland.

I suppose you really are there.

Oh, yes.

Prove it.

Oh, steady.

Fair enough.

You're there, all right.

Too much so.

How?

Oh, it's not at all interesting.

Why, sure it is.

Come, i've done all the talking about myself.

You'll make me feel i've imposed.

Very well. How shall i put it?

Just as you have too little life,

I have too much.

It's hard for me to believe how that could be.

If you tried it, you would know.

I have a 16th-Century chateau,

Badly in need of repair and modern plumbing.

I have a title of the same antiquity,

Equally lacking in modern conveniences.

I have an income dating from the 19th century,

When the franc was 25 to the pound.

I have a family business which runs at a loss

But which cannot be closed

Because that would throw faithful employees out of work.

But those are all things.

Life consists of people.

People.

Very well.

I have- No, no. I can't bear it.

Let us just say that there are too many...

And more than enough.

Too much or too little-

There seems nothing in life between.

Still, i don't know

That i wouldn't prefer

Your surfeit to my own lack.

I wonder if you would.

I'll see if they have a room.

My key.

No call in the morning.

I may sleep very late.

Will you bring me up a bottle of champagne?

Open it, please.

They haven't a room free, but mine has two beds,

So if you wouldn't mhnd sharing...

I don't like to intrude.

It's no intrusion.

Much simpler than trudging elsewhere.

Ahh... it's trying to rain.

I thought so.

So...

Hmm...

It's not exactly a palace,

But men have fared worse.

I'm rather drunk.

On such a noteworthy occasion,

That should cause neither surprise

Nor regret.

I'm not regretting it in the least.

First time in years.

That sort of thing's frowned on in our common room.

Unlike some universities-

College port and drunken dons-

Plain living and high thinking for us.

Oh, thank you.

Good night.

I took the liberty

Of ordering us a nightcap.

There's no liberty whatever.

Oh, silly fellow's only brought one glass.

Oh, well, not worth disturbing him again.

I'll use a glass from the bathroom.

Is champagne all right...

On top of all that brandy?