Friends

Previously on Friends:

- I can't believe you won't be there. - I know.

Why can't you take a couple of days off?

- Because I can't. - This is my wedding.

- I can't wait to see it. - Her parents got married there.

It's the most beautiful place. It's right over...

Oh, my God!

The only thing I understand is postponing is not an option.

This wedding is not gonna happen.

If you don't love this, then we'll do it any other place or time. It's fine.

It's perfect.

- I'm going to London. - What?

It's not over until someone says, "I do."

I do! I do! I do!

Rachel, no!

The Waltham residence.

Hi, is this Emily's parents' house?

This is the housekeeper.

And, by the way, that is not how one addresses a person on the telephone.

First one identifies oneself...

...and then asks for the person with whom one wishes to speak.

Um, this is Phoebe Buffay.

I was wondering, please...

...if it's not too much trouble, please...

...um, might I speak with Miss Emily Waltham, please?

Miss Waltham is at the rehearsal dinner.

And it is not polite to make fun of people. Goodbye.

No, no! I'll be nice, I swear.

Could you just give me their number?

I'm afraid I'm not at liberty to divulge that information.

Somebody is on their way to ruin the wedding, and I have to warn them.

So give me that number or I'll come over there...

...and I'll kick your snooty ass all the way to New Gloukenshire!

Hello? Hello? Oh!

Ooh, she knew I could kick her ass.

Hi, sweetheart.

Mom, Dad.

Oh, sorry, we're late.

My fault. I insisted on riding the tube.

Judy, the kids!

That's what they call the subway.

Oh!

I thought...

Dad, we got it.

Oh! Here comes my dad and stepmom.

Mr. And Mrs. Geller.

This is Steven...

...and Andrea Waltham.

How do you do? Very nice to meet you.

- Ha, ha! - Eh, darling, the Gellers.

Darling, it's the Gellers.

She's self-involved. I should never have married her.

- Sorry, what? - It's the Gellers.

- Where? - That's one and that's another one.

Lovely to meet you.

Nice of you to pay for half the wedding.

Oh, the hell with tradition! We're happy to do it.

Oh, we know how expensive weddings can be.

Besides, this may be the only wedding we get to throw.

Ahem, ha, ha.

A joke that's funny in all countries.

Sir?

- What's in it? - Goat cheese, watercress and pancetta.

That's not food.

No, I don't want it.

Everything's different here. I want to go home.

I miss my family, the coffeehouse.

I can't remember what Phoebe looks like!

Joey, it's been three days.

Oh.

Okay, you're just a little homesick.

Would you just try to relax and just enjoy yourself?

You're different here too.

You're mean in England!

What the hell?

What's up, Dad?

This bill for my half. It's insane.

Why is it so much? The reception's at their house.

Flowers, liquor. Re-carpet first floor?

New guest bath, landscaping.

I'm paying to remodel this house.

I'll give that son of a bitch a piece of my mind.

Dad. Please.

I don't want anything to upset Emily.

She's had a hard enough couple of days as it is.

Here. Let me go talk to him.

You tell him no one takes advantage of the Gellers.

Ooh, Jack.

Sometimes I forget how powerful you can be.

And I'll go get drunk.

Oh! Oh! Oh!

- Hi. - Hello.

Hello.

Um, when is your next flight to London?

- There's one leaving in 30 minutes. - Oh!

And I do have one seat left.

Oh, thank you, thank you.

The last-minute fare on this ticket is $2700.

Ugh. I don't have enough left on my credit card.

You can split it with another card.

Okay, how about five?

Oh, thank you.

I need to see your passport.

I don't have it, but I can tell you where it is on my nightstand.

You know what? I have my driver's license.

And I have a 20.

Face it, my father is not gonna pay for the built-in barbecue.

And believe me, you can kiss your gazebo goodbye.

I might be able to get you the new lawn.

Ah! Then you have to give us the lawn ornaments.

I go back there with lawn ornaments, he'll laugh in my face.

Will you say something, Steven?

Don't take that tone with me.

All right, you can.

- Hi, Pheebs. - Oh, thank God!

Oh, you changed your mind. Ugh!

You probably don't want to talk about it.

You're doing the right thing.

- Bye, Pheebs. - Where are you going?

What are you doing? No, wait.

Why am I always pregnant when she does that?

I'd like to toast Ross and Emily.

My big toast is tomorrow.

This is kind of my little toast, or Melba toast, if you will.

Okay.

Ahem. I knew Ross when he was, uh, going out with his first girlfriend.

Oh, heh.

I thought things would work out until he over-inflated her.

Oh, dear God!

Hello, Waltham Interiors.

Oh! Hi, Mrs. Waltham.

I need to speak with, um, one of the best men or Ross' sister.

- Who is this? - Oh, Phoebe, one of Ross' best friends.

If you're Ross' friend, why aren't you here?

Um, I can't fly. I'm having my brother's babies.

Oh.

Am I on the radio?

No. Um...

...can I talk to one of them? It's important.

I'm bored of you now. I'm going to cut you off.

Oh!

We're excited that, uh, Ross and Emily are getting married at Montgomery Hall.

To think, my friend getting married in Monty Hall.

Oh, come on, Monty Hall!

Let's Make a Deal. Come on, you people!

All right, forget it. Congratulations, Ross and Emily.

Hey. Best man number two, Joey Tribbiani. Ha, ha.

I'm not good with the jokes like Chandler here.

But, uh...

...congratulations to the happy couple.

I first met Ross in this coffeehouse back home.

Home.

New York City.

Where everybody knows my name.

Uh, anyway...

...uh, I love you guys.

But not as much as I love America.

Can we please go home now?

Are you going home?

I was hoping to get to know you better.

I'm not going anywhere, sweetheart.

I was laughing.

Out loud?

I didn't want everyone to think I was stupid.

So how are you doing?

My mom's driving me crazy. But Ross is getting married!

I'm happy. I won't let anything spoil that.

Mm-hm.

I just want to say that Ross is a wonderful young man.

Oh, thanks. We like him. Ha, ha.

My God! You must have been a teenager when you had him.

There's no way in hell I'm paying for it.

Look, we're down to just one point.

Could we please just settle it after the wedding?

Fine, but I'm not paying for your wine cellar...

...you thieving, would-be-speaking- German-if-it-weren't-for-us man!

The guy was hammered. There's no way you look like Ross' mother.

- Then why would he say it? - Because he's crazy!

Earlier, he thanked me for my very moving performance in Titanic.

My mother's right. I'll never get married.

Ha! You know what, that is...

Who wouldn't want you?

Please! I'm a single mom with a 30-year-old son.

I'm getting married today!

Whoo! Heh.

Morning.

I'm getting married today!