What Breaks the Ice

That's really cute.

- It's fine. - You don't? You wouldn't...

No, no, no. It's fine. It looks good.

It'd be a cute blazer.

All right, I'll try it.

- There's nothing you want here? - No.

Hey! Yeah, I want to try this and this.

Also this...

Bye.

Cool necklace.

Thanks.

Who makes it?

I don't know.

The army?

- Oh, so it's real. - Yeah.

That's dope.

I'm so over fake shit.

- Hi. - Hey.

Hand it over.

I don't know what you're talking about.

- I see you stealing. - Hey! Get your hands off of me!

Jesus, Owen!

Do you know this girl?

Yeah.

I told her I'd spot her on the way out.

My bad.

Say hello to your mother.

So, do you live here, all year?

All my life.

That's crazy.

I've always wanted to meet a real townie.

I'm sorry.

Is that rude?

No, it's cool. It's what I am.

You know, we've names for people like you too.

- What? - Joyriders.

- Emily? - Oh, shit!

That's my mom.

I better go before she thinks I've been abducted.

- True story. - Emily!

I'm Emily, by the way.

Sammy.

All right, girls, good job today.

Okay, let's pick up the balls.

We don't want to pick up balls.

Mommy says we don't have to.

Well, yeah...

Okay? I'll see you at the Hart Ball tonight.

Bye.

Hi, darlings.

You're a darling, Samantha. See you Thursday.

- Thank you. - Let's go!

Snacks at the country club, okay?

Hey!

You can't let 'em push you around like that.

- Mm-hmm. - You want those people to respect you,

you show 'em you're not afraid of them.

Yeah, well, I don't mind their money.

They'll give it to you, anyway.

Trust me, I've been

doing this job for a long time.

Yeah.

Hey, let's, uh, head to the clubhouse.

There's somebody I want you to meet.

Come on.

Hi. Elaine.

Hi, Emily. Hey, so this is Sammy.

The girl I was telling you about earlier.

- Hi. - Hi.

So the Greenfields here are staying for the summer,

and I thought maybe you two would wanna hang out,

hit a couple balls on the courts?

Do you want to meet on the courts around three?

- Yeah. - Okay.

Um...

take down my number.

You play well.

Who taught you?

Uh, Jerry. I'm friends with his daughter.

- Oh. - Yeah.

- Can I see your racquet? - Yeah.

Your strings are loose.

Yeah, I've been meaning to get it restrung.

Here.

Take this one.

- Really? - Yeah.

I have like, four more.

- Thank you. - Of course.

Do you want to go in the lake?

Huh?

Do you want to go in the lake, with me?

- Uh, I can't... - Don't worry.

You're not going to get in any trouble.

You're with me.

Suck my big fat...

So, the one in the blue is Seth.

The one in the green

is his idiot, fraternal twin brother, Brett.

Our parents have been friends forever,

so they got the brilliant idea that we should

all rent houses here for the summer.

Which is fine. Like it's nice. But it's not the Hamptons.

No offense.

No, it's cool.

I get it.

That's why I already like you.

You're not sensitive,

like my idiot bitch friends in Manhattan.

My friend Lauren threw a hissy fit

because I didn't like her pedicure.

Can you believe that?

But seriously, who gets a "French" on their toes?

Just do it, dude. Don't get scared.

So, what do think about Seth?

Um, he looks nice.

We hook up sometimes.

When we're drunk

or bored.

It's kind of the same thing, right?

Right.

He came over last night.

Do you want to know what happened?

Sure.

If you don't care, then I won't tell you.

Of course, I care.

We drank a 40 in my backyard,

and then he fingered me...

and then I almost had an orgasm, but then I didn't.

Why not?

Why... didn't I have an orgasm?

They're super rare.

Like, only 5% of girls

have them before they're 25.

He's totally obsessed with me.

How do you know?

Trust me, I just do.

What do you think?

Old fart? No. This guy?

No, I'm serious.

I once went to school drunk, just took some shots.

- Would you like anything else? - No.

...she got her labia stuck in her tennis skirt

- and she couldn't play... - Oh, God.

...for the rest of the game...

- What's up? Look at this. - Hey.

Yes, Seth, you can have one of our mozzarella sticks.

Yeah I know, that's why I'm eating it.

You're welcome.

You see the lifeguard's new bikini?

Yes.

It's disgusting.

- Really? - Yes.

I mean, Brett liked it, though. Didn't you?

Of course, he did.

I told you that in confidence.

Well, you said it.

Um, this is Sammy.

What's up Sammy?

Hi.

You guys should totally come over later.

Um...

We have plans later.

Oh, yeah? Sure.

- Fine. - Fine.

Well, Sammy seems like a chill girl, so...

I think she's down.

You down, Sammy?

- Don't do this to her. - What?

- I'm asking her if she's down. - Don't listen to him.

Are you down, Sammy?

We're busy.

Yeah, we're busy.

All right.

Well, you guys have fun with your plans later.

All right.

- Thanks. - You're welcome.

Assholes.

Honestly,

I was really scared my first time.

I just, kind of like...

closed my eyes and lowered my head

until it was in my mouth.

It wasn't that bad.

It was kinda fun.

So you're still a virgin?

Yeah. I mean, technically,

but I like all the other stuff.

I keep them in my wallet, just in case.

I think it's a good idea.

So, I've been thinking about it.

I feel like we should lose it together,

like in the same room,

at the same time.

That way, we can be there for each other,

if it's fucking terrible.

My cousins Becky and Brooke did that.

At some sleep-away camp in New Hampshire.

They lost it to two of the baseball coaches.

It was dark, so it wasn't like lesbo or anything.

What's so great about sex anyway?