Oklahoma!

Hey!

Aunt Eller.

Ah! Scared me to death.

What you doin' around here?

Well, I come a sing in' to ya.

If I wasn't an old woman and you wasn't so young

and smart alecky, I'd marry you.

Get you to sit around at night and sing to me.

No you wouldn't either, 'cause I wouldn't marry you,

nor none of your kinfolks if I could help it.

No, none of my kinfolks, huh?

You tell them that, all of them,

including that niece of yours,

Miss Laurey Williams.

Aunt Eller, if you want to tell me

where Laurey was at, where would you tell me she was at?

I wouldn't tell ya. Not at all.

As far as I can make out, Laurey ain't payin' you no heed.

So she don't take to me much, huh?

Where'd you get such an uppety niece that wouldn't pay no heed to me?

Who's the best bronc buster in this here territory?

Why, you, I bet.

And the best bulldogger in 17 counties?

Me. That's who.

Lookey here.

I'm handsome, ain't I?

Purdy as a picture.

Curly-headed, ain't I?

And bow-legged from the saddle

for God knows how long, ain't I?

Couldn't stop a pig in the road.

What else does she want then, the damn she-mule?

Well, I don't know, but I'm sure certain it ain't you.

So, who are you taking to the Box Social tonight?

Oh, I ain't thought much about it.

Oh, I bet you come over to ask Laurey.

- What if I did? - What, you asking me, too?

I'll wear my fascinator.

- You too? - Yeah.

Oh. I thought you were somebody.

Is this all that's come a-calling

at already 10:00 on a Saturday morning?

You knowed it was me before you opened the door.

- No such of a thing. - You did too.

You heard my voice. You know it was me.

I heard a voice a-talking rumbly along at Aunt Eller.

I heard someone singing like a bullfrog in a pond.

You knew it was me, you sittin' there thinkin' up somethin' mean to say.

I've a good mind not to ask you to the Box Social.

Well, if you did ask me, I wouldn't go with you.

Besides, how would you take me?

You ain't bought a new buggy with red wheels onto it, have you?

No, I ain't.

And a spanking team their bridles all a-jingling.

No.

Expect me to ride on behind ole Dun, I guess.

Better ask that old Cummings girl

you took such a shine to across the river.

Well, if I was to ask you,

there'd be a way to take you, Miss Laurey Smarty.

Huh? There would?

Lands!

So you can tell them apart.

Hya!

Wa-haw!

You'd sure feel like a queen sitting up in that carriage.

Only she talked so mean to me a while back,

Aunt Eller, I've a good mind not to take her.

Ain't said I was going.

Ain't asked ya.

Where'd you get such a rig at?

I'll bet he went and hired a rig over to Claremore

thinking I'd go with him.

That's all you know about it.

Oh, oh, oh, spent all his money

hiring a rig and now he ain't got nobody to ride in it.

I have, too.

Look, I did not hire it.

I made the whole thing up out of my head.

What?

Made it up?

Dashboard and all.

Go on, get off of the place, you.

Aunt Eller, make him get himself out of here.

Telling me lies.

Makin' up a few little... whoo!

Making up a few little pretties--hey!

Look out, now.

Making up a few pretties ain't against any law I know of.

Hey, don't you wish there was such a rig though?

Hmm?

Then you can go to that play party

and do a little hoedown till morning

if you was a-mind to.

And then...

when you was all wore out,

I'd lift you up onto that surrey,

jump up alongside of you and...

we'd just point the horses home.

Hush, hush, you bird.

Whoa, you team.

Only...

Only ain't no such rig.

What you just said, you made the whole thing up.

Well...

Why'd you come 'round here, these stories and lies

getting me all worked up that way?

Talking about the sun swimming on the hill like it was so.

Laurey...

Who'd want to ride alongside you anyway?

Oh, why don't you just grab her and kiss her

when she acts that way, Curly?

She's just aching for you, too, I bet.

I wouldn't even speak to him

let alone allow him to kiss me,

the bragging, bowlegged, wish-he'd-had-a-sweetheart bum.

She likes you. Quite a lot.

Yeah, if she liked me anymore, she'd sic the dogs out on me.

Listen, Aunt Eller, I got to know something.

Who's the low filthy sneak Laurey's got her cap set for?

Oh, that's you.

No, never mind that.

There must be plenty of men trying to spark her