Into the Dark - First Season

I'm just fucking with you.

Hey.

Larry, you coming or what?

I already made the reservation.

Well, I reserve the right to tell you to cancel it.

‐ Stop.

Mom and Dad are here at the hotel.

Everyone knows how hard this is for you,

but we just want to see you.

‐ Look, you're the only one that I want to see.

Holy fucking shit.

Get on Cindy's Twitter feed now.

Oh my God.

Some genius just totally flamed her.

Who the hell is ProgrammingFlaw, anyway?

‐ What?

Someone needs to give that guy a medal.

Wow.

Okay, so, you're coming, right?

‐ I just‐‐ I just don't want to.

Well, then I'll come to you then.

You're staying in some

flamboyantly vile place, right?

Tell me. Come on, tell me.

‐ Ugh, fine.

I'm staying at the...

Pink Motel and Lounge.

Ooh, sounds so very.

I'll leave here in a minute.

Ciao, Lar‐Bear.

Hello?

Hello?

Oh, man, I had you going there.

Yeah, man.

You got me good, that was good.

‐ You got a problem?

‐ What? No.

‐ Hmm.

Yeah, you do.

‐ I can't believe you. ‐ I'm just fucking with you!

April Fools, big boy!

That was a good one.

Let's try that again.

How can I help you?

‐ I'm just looking to check in.

Are you the owner? ‐ Nope.

I'm Chester.

‐ Uh, Larry.

Oh, hey, I'm Gerald.

You can call me Gerry, Larry, pleasure's all mine.

‐ Yeah, um...

So can I just check in with you, or?

‐ Yeah, I'm pulling double duty tonight.

It's off‐season,

so the owners are cutting costs.

Can't stay mad at them.

They're real sweet old‐timers.

‐ Huh, I hear you.

Well, I've had kind of a long drive, so

just love to get to bed.

Oh yeah, of course.

Room's 75 bucks.

No tax if you've got it in cash.

‐ Great, great, yeah.

‐ It's an insult

to leave a beverage a man's given you.

- Gerald... sorry. - Here you go.

‐ It's common courtesies.

‐ I mean, I can have... uh, sure.

Attaboy, attaboy.

‐ Thanks.

Okay, what are we drinking to?

‐ To the beautiful sound of laughter.

‐ Okay. ‐ Amen, to the beautiful

sound of laughter, God bless you!

Mm.

Woo!

Now.

Mm.

Chester, it has been great getting to know you.

Larry, nice.

I know.

I'll wipe that up.

‐ Huh. Nice guy, huh?

‐ Aw, he's a teddy bear.

Great sense of humor.

‐ Oh, really?

‐ So what are you in for?

‐ Oh, just this family wedding thing, it's...

‐ Oh. Those are the worst.

Maybe you'll get your bone buried.

‐ Oh, yeah.

‐ What's going on with you, man?

Sit down, come on.

Vent to Chester, sit down.

‐ Uh, um... no, it's, it's...

I don't know, it should be fine, actually.

‐ Wah, wah! Wrong answer.

‐ No, I mean, it's just...

there's a lot of people I haven't seen in a while,

so that's...

‐ There's more to it than that.

‐ Okay, okay, um...

I don't know, I hate dancing,

first of all.

The food's always a letdown.

‐ The food, really? Come on.

‐ All right. I had to shell out 75 bucks

for cookie sheets because they were

the last thing on the registry.

‐ Aw, cookie sheets!

Like Miss Piggy's ever gonna bake

her own cookies, right?

‐ That's, I mean... I'll tell you what, though.

I hope that she likes those cookie sheets,

because, honestly, they're gonna last

a lot longer than her marriage.

‐ That sounds like a girl that you wouldn't marry.

‐ Nah, marriage is just not my thing.

‐ To lone wolves forever.

‐ Yeah!

Yeah.

So I really am just really tuckered out,

so could I get the key? ‐ No sweat.

All I need is your credit card

and we'll sign you right in.

‐ I already gave you the 75 bucks for the room.

‐ Oh, I get it.

Tit‐for‐tat, right?

No, I'm just gonna need that credit card.

‐ Are you serious?

‐ Afraid so, man, I mean, I ain't operating

a halfway house here.

‐ No, I'm not saying that,

it's just that when I first came in,

you remember, like, a minute ago,

you said if I give you cash,

then you wouldn't charge tax?

And then, I took out the cash

and I handed you the cash.

I mean, that guy, that biker guy, he‐‐

‐ First of all, his name is Gerald,

and second, I never check in anyone

without proper paperwork for this reason.

‐ I understand that, but this is crazy.

I mean, what are you trying to pull here?

‐ Look, man.

You came in here, we had some drinks,

we had some laughs,

and if you want a room, that's great.

I'll just need a photo ID and a credit card.

‐ All right, well, empty your pockets, then.

‐ Excuse me?

‐ You empty your pockets

and you'll see my money in there.

You put the money‐‐ this is ridiculous.

I mean, do I have to call the cops?

‐ Go ahead, call the cops.

And while you're at it, I got another idea.

Put out your goddamned hand,

because I got your room key right here.

Oh, man, you should have seen yourself.

I'm just fucking with you, man.

‐ Oh, okay. ‐ You should have

seen yourself, "This is ridiculous!

Do I have to call the cops?"

- ‐ No, you know... - Sorry, man.

You want me to call the bellman?

‐ No.

‐ Good, because we don't have one.

Okay.

‐ Oh.

Take me, big boy.

Here's our viewer video of the week,

straight from Marshall.

That's right, Chuck, it is still chaos out here

on South Citrus at that multi‐car pileup

that has caused gridlock in both directions.

Details are still trickling in,

but witnesses report seeing the pickup truck

swerving erratically before veering into

oncoming traffic, causing this chain reaction

which left one young woman dead

and several people in critical condition,

including an infant.

The driver, who witnesses say

was visibly intoxicated,

then fled the scene.

Sheriffs found the suspect's vehicle,

a late‐model white pickup,

a few blocks away from the scene of the accident,

where it appears as if the sus‐‐

‐ Oh, come on, come on, come on.

Hi, you've reached Rachel.

I'm away from the phone right now,

but I'll call you back if you leave a message.

Where the fuck are you?

‐ Hello, Pink Motel and Lounge.

‐ Hi, uh, Chester?

‐ The one and only.