Ick

Wallace, what are you doing princes?

Let's go!

We got a game to win!

Get your head out of here!

I want to see it.

You'll take me with you.

To college and to the NFL.

To a giant mansion with a giant pool that has a fat hot tub that's connected to the

giant pool so I can swim from out to go whenever I want.

Yes.

Amazing.

It holds 10 songs.

I put all our favorites on it.

Don't let this change your life, kid.

Our little secret.

Can't move across the whole country.

Only if he's booked twice.

Once for a game in Vickersburg and then once in Vickersburg by accident.

Where?

I should probably mark Vickersburg better.

Son, let me tell you a little story about the Beatles.

They played about 250 shows and all this little

shit was in and around the city of Hamburg.

And you know how they became the biggest band in the world?

In fact, they left Hamburg.

Oh,

why don't you go dance with Ted Kim?

Are you serious?

Yeah.

He looks lonely.

American need his traditions.

Jane Morris just said I've had more holes filled than her grandpa's bow and bow.

Take me home.

Probably shouldn't, because I'm, you know, I don't think I'm too tight to jump.

I'm excited.

What about over there?

I love you.

Take care.

Wallace, now suit up and kill Vickersburg.

Vickersburg!

Are you a Mitchell camp's acting up?

I ain't no All-American!

Get over here!

All state quarterback Nate Wallace is his total just for himself tonight.

We need to talk.

We'll see if Wallace can pull himself together on this drive.

Eastbrook needs this W against Vickersburg.

Damn, great.

Wallace is scrambling.

Hey.

Congratulate.

Shut up.

Nate.

Sit down.

Hi.

I'm Hank and I'm an alcoholic.

Hello, my old friend.

Living in the past, Hank?

You were a bright kid.

Even if you didn't apply yourself.

I bet there's a lot more you could offer Eastbrook high.

Uh, forget.

Forget your preconceptions about bacterial reproduction.

Because most of it's asexual.

Which, you know, you kids should all be.

You don't tell true love or whatever.

Um, I'd use protection.

Okay, let's see what kind of nasty bugs live in her mouths.

We just need everybody to spit in this.

That's what your mom said.

Hey, come on, guys.

Phone's away.

We have important things to do.

Mr. Wallace?

Yeah, Grace?

What's on our phones is important.

Why aren't we talking about the egg?

Okay, Grace.

Let's talk about the ick.

There's no origin story for ick.

We didn't watch it arrive on a meteor or escape from a government lab.

It's just... here.

First we hardly noticed.

But each day, year by year, it kept growing.

It doesn't move, at least we don't think.

It's stationary as a plant, growing, spreading slowly.

It's omnipresent, but not bothersome enough that cars can't drive down the street.

People can't go about their usual routines.

Most folks choose to ignore the ick altogether, hoping it just goes away.

Especially with rumors swirling that it's starting to attack.

All right.

Bring up the beach renditions on the desk, please.

Have a good day.

Hey, Grace.

How's your mom?

Fine, Mr. Wallace.

Oh, that's good.

That's good.

How's your mom?

Dan.

Did you say Charlie's TikTok about how the ick is pure gluten?

What's gluten?

Check this out, Jazza.

Straight up video of the asteroid that brought the ick.

That's the scene from the movie Armageddon.

We have to take this problem seriously, don't turn it into something new.

Look.

The ick is just Franken-poo-GMO set free from Monsanto lab.

That's why I only eat organic.

Cultural appropriate much?

I'm a 64th Cherokee with receipts, and I'm telling you, J.

Guava wouldn't approve of your capitalistic colonial mindset, son.

Come on.

I almost lost my appetite.

This whole making reminds us all to avoid new growth of the ick in the western men's

room, and the jokes of it resembling his wife's slimy lady parts.

This will not be tolerated.

Will ick affect the primary?

We're joined now by our political panel.

Clearly, the ick disproportionately affects black and brown voters.

Well, I heard the ick started in China.

Bad eating weirdos.

Maybe the government will send a team to help clean it up.

Well, we're definitely not getting any help before fingers break.

Hola.

She's, um... how do you say blue, huh?

Your grandma likes to make beer.

What a surprise coming from the ick-worshipping mountains come off.

You kidding me.

Bruja is a witch.

Mia, when a bruja says that ick is a ick from the gospel.

Secure or infernate lover, Guava.

Go.

The ick won't save us, Sofia.

It's... vicious.

Are you staring at my boobs?

No, I wasn't staring at your boobs.

That is so inappropriate.

Who's fainter?

Did you kill me again?

The ick does not move, mi amor.

Well, I know what I saw.

Yes, you're dead.

Worshing ick removal on the American voters is government overreach.

Well, you're right, especially when the date is clear that vitamin D isn't effective.

Oh, my God, I'm pregnant.

Have some class, you piece of shit.

I'll take it from now available.

And so am I, taking all offers, even just for some very lonely.

Well, Griffin, if he takes you to prom, you'll let him play with your boobs.

Okay.

Wait, what?

No.

You want to spend another summer doing steampunk cosplay at the Ren fair?

How are we friends?

Hi.

Hey.

What's your drawing?

Wow, that's really good.

What kind of monkey is that?

Uh, it's a... regular monkey.

Huh?

The problem's coming.

I'll let you play with my...

Nevermind.

This week's film closer, his velotar is slow set on masterpiece.

Sock and talk now.

Enjoy seven hours of Hungarians being sad and locked away.

Let's go!

You ladies are moving slower than these tar tentacles!

That's racist.

Attaboy.

Oh, boy.

Is the ink gonna do anything?

It's been here, like, two months.

The ink's been here for years.

Huh.

I guess I just never really noticed what it's doing here.

What's anything doing here?

Stone sucks.

Hey!

You girls smoking?

No.

Come on!

I'm good.

It just takes a second.

I wrote a new poem.

Industrial love stinking number three.

Going for that Ginsburg vibe.

I mean, it's what I was...

We're on, like, 13 seconds, so I don't, like, care or anything.

But I'll probably monitor poetry when I get to Overlook next year.

I'm not going.

Hey.

What, you're gonna get off the wait list?

A wait list is a slow motion swipe left of college admissions.

I'm not leaving Eastbrook.

I'm staying here.

I just want to grow fat and old, eating built-vita

sandwiches like the rest of the proletariat.