أول 200 سطر.
Great darts.
Now, hurry up, he's coming back on.
- Welcome back to the World
Darts Championship.
In this cricket match, Smith and Henricksen
have closed the 20s through the 15s
and have two bullseyes.
They're also ahead by 20 points.
Whitman and Keyes have closed the 20s through the 15s
and have one bullseye.
Allistair Whitman is gonna need three bullseyes
to win the first televised world championship.
- And he's really gonna have to hit three
because Henricksen has been
hammering the bullseye all night.
- Well, if anybody can get a hat trick,
it's Allistair Whitman.
Oh, that all but ends the match.
He has to hit a double bullseye to win,
and he's completely blocked it.
Start engraving Smith and Henricksen on the trophy.
- Whitman and Keyes have
won the world championship!
- I am gobsmacked, how did he do that?
It's not human, I tell you.
Somebody get down there and stop the engraver.
That is the greatest closing dart
in the history of this game.
- Thrown by the greatest player
in the history of this game.
- That's for you, weirdo mittens...
Weirdo mittens.
You were not in the CIA.
Yes, I was.
I was in Berlin when the wall came down.
Do you think that happened by itself?
- You're so full of shit, Virge.
- All right, showtime, Mitch! - Ooh, showtime, baby!
- All right, all right, you got this, Hank.
All we need is one bullseye to win.
Are you crazy?
He hasn't hit a bullseye all night.
No way.
- Well, I'm willing to bet you double or nothing
on your bar tab he's gonna hit one right now.
- Oh, you're on. - All right.
Your deal, one bullseye, okay?
You got this, buddy.
Aw.
- What in the hell were you aiming at?
What do you think?
- How the hell am I supposed to know?
You hit literally every other damn thing in the room
except the bullseye.
- You know, Hank, that happens again,
the rules say that if you catch the dart
before it hits the floor, you can shoot it again.
Thanks.
Have you ever caught a dart that bounced off the board?
No.
- Have you ever seen anybody
catch a dart that bounced off the board?
No.
- Have you ever even heard a story about someone
catching a dart that bounced off the board?
No.
- Well, thanks, that's great advice.
- What, are you trying to be cute, Hank?
Now, I'm gonna kick your ass!
All right, Dana, you got this.
Come on.
Ha! - Oh!
Showtime baby!
Showtime!
Woo-oo-hoo!
- Drinks. - Yep.
Hoo!
Hey, thanks for the drinks.
Our pleasure, anytime.
- Showtime, baby!
Showtime!
- That loss drops us to number eight in the standings.
One more and we're right out of the playoffs.
Yeah, Dana was right.
I didn't hit a bull all night.
No.
Bro, you just gotta learn how to close the game.
Well, it doesn't help with you
betting the whole tab on the match.
Can we afford that? - I know.
I should have made a disclaimer like only their drinks,
like we couldn't buy for Ian and Virgil too,
but, I don't know, I'm an idiot.
- Yeah. - Sorry.
Dude, what are you doing?
You talking about Jackie?
- Yeah, just couldn't think of a song with Jackie in it.
- Wait, was that supposed to be "Come on Eileen"?
It's nowhere near the lyrics, dude.
- Oh my God, it's not about the song, Hank.
What I'm talking about here is closing the deal.
You only live once, bro.
Yeah, okay.
When's the last time you went on a date?
- Hey, I've dated most of the girls around here.
I've just run out of options.
It's a small town.
I'm gonna die alone.
You on the other hand. - Shut up, dude.
I am beat.
I know.
Fucking show time.
I'm never playing them again.
I'm done, I hate 'em.
It's so stupid.
We'll get 'em next time, baby.
Don't worry about it. - Show time!
No show time!
They're so stupid.
Hey, hey.
Dittle for the middle.
See who opens in the morning.
Dude.
Shit!
Ah, have a good night, man.
Hey, Jackie. - Hi, Hank.
How was the match last night?
Tough one, huh? - We'll bounce back.
You want something?
- Yeah, just some flights, I guess.
What do those ones say on 'em?
- These? - The ones next to 'em.
Foxy Mama.
- It's funny 'cause I was gonna ask,
have you ever had one before?
Um...no.
Really?
They're kind of awesome.
In fact, you should come by the bar sometime.
We could have one together.
- Yeah, I really don't think that's gonna be my thing.
- Oh, come on, you can at least try one.
I think you'll like it, and if for some reason you don't,
I'll get you something else.
- What the hell are you talking about, Hank?
What do you mean?
Oh, okay.
Ah, oh my God.
I thought you said Bahama Mama like the drink.
- Ah, okay, yeah, that makes way more sense.
I was like, he wants to share a foxy mama with me.
Have we met? - No, no.
Sorry, it's, in my head I heard Bahama Mama.
I've been making drinks way too long.
You still want 'em?
- Yeah, I gotta get 'em now, right?
It's two bucks.
Don't even worry about it.
These are on me.
Really?
- You come in here almost every day and buy something.
I think I could let this slide.
Oh, thanks.
You're welcome.
- Um, I gotta get back to work, but thanks again.
And seriously, if you want to come by the bar one night,
I'll make us a couple of Bahama Mamas.
Maybe it'll be your thing.
- I might just take you up on that.
I'll see ya.
- Hey Hank, I still haven't got my latest check
from when I produced "Back to the Future,"
and I was wondering--
- You did not produce that movie.
- Yes, I did. - No, you didn't.
I looked it up. - Yes, I did.
I'm the one who told Bob to use a DeLorean.
Do you know what the time machine was before that?
A refrigerator.
How bad would that movie have sucked
if they used a refrigerator?
- Then how come you're not on IMDB?
- 'Cause I'm the uncredited guy behind the scenes.
My ass.
You're a very kind young man.
Ian, can I please bum a--
Piss off.
- Here, Virgil, someone left these here.
- Thanks, buddy, one of these days.
No worries.
- All right, another rusty nail, make it a double.
Bro, this is pathetic.
We need to do another ladies' night or something.
We've had three.
I've been wanting to do karaoke night though.
That could be cool. - Yeah, that could be cool.
But we need something.
Something big, something different.
Some way to get people in here.
- Hey! - Real people.
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