Combatants Will Be Dispatched! (戦闘員、派遣します！)

Combat Agent Six.

Ma'am!

Your assignment Is to be

the vanguard of the Kisaragi Corporation.

Our advance man. Our spy.

Ma'am!

We've discovered several planets

in the known universe that appear to be

extremely similar to Earth.

And we'll need you...

...to scout one of them.

Ma'am!

Hmm? Huh?

Now go forth, Agent Six!

Go forth and make our power felt throughout the universe!

You're gonna have to do this whole spiel again,

'cause I don't follow!

Exactly what do you fail to grasp?

Uh, all of it?!

I mean, if people could even go to other planets

in the first place, I'd already be outta this dump

and chillin' on planet TIG OL 'BITTIES!

Hey.

Okay, I've been silent on the whole

tacky cosplay thing, and never laughed at your corny titles.

But this "power through the universe" BS

is just a bridge too far!

What?! My uniform isn't tacky cosplay!

Look! "Astaroth the Ice Queen"

and "Belial the Great Flame" are titles befitting two of

the three Supreme leaders of Kisaragi!

There's absolutely nothing "tacky" about them!

C'mon, Yukari, who're ya tryin' to fool?

Like, what do your parents think about all this stuff?

-- --Ugh! No mention of parents

--or anyone's real names! -- Hmph.

Listen well, Agent Six.

We are on the verge of conquering this entire planet.

You do understand that much of it, don't you?

Yeah, more or less.

So, when that conquest is fully complete,

what do you think happens to you combat agents?

We become gods on Earth and spend our days rolling

inside a soft, supple, pit of hot lady flesh?

Imbecile!

You'll be cut from the workforce!

You mean you'd actually fire me?!

That's right!

-- --

Hey! You made me go through all those operations and stuff

so you can't just throw me in the trash! You owe me!

At least let me come live with you

and be your sexy house-husband, okay?

I can explain everything,

--if you stop freaking out! --

Current space travel technology hasn't taken us

any farther than the moon.

But our third supreme leader and scientific genius,

Lilith the Dark, has been working on solving that issue.

Behold!

Feast your eyes on yet another of my marvels of engineering

that may be the answer to every problem facing humanity today!

So what is it, Lilith?

Kinda looks like a teleporter from an old timey sci-fi movie.

What a sharp observation.

Especially coming from such a dull brain.

-- -- Hmph!

And lurking behind it is yet another masterpiece.

Alice, come here.

Huh? Huh?! Uh, so who's the brat?

I am not just some "brat."

Mind your tone around your betters, lowbie.

Eh? What the--?

You'd better watch your tone 'cause a combat agent

for an evil organization is not above hurting kids!

Oh. So much as lay a finger on me,

and my core reactor will melt down and vaporize everything

within a wide radius. But if that's not a problem, proceed.

As I was saying, my official designation isn't that

of a child. It's "Kisaragi High Spec Pretty Girl Android."

Really...?

Indeed it is. This is Alice,

a high-spec android created to provide you critical support.

I've been informed that you're a complete moron.

So allow me to do all the thinking

once our mission begins.

Sorry, but the last thing I need is a mouthy little

walking time-bomb sidekick, okay?

Any other weapons or additional items you may require

can be obtained with a written request

via this miniature teleporter.

Your chips will send us your coordinates.

You will have two primary objectives.

First, to secure a base.

There, you'll assemble a teleporter

for two-way travel with Earth.

Secondly, to survey the planet.

Your subjects are wide-ranging:

military threats, natural resources, things of that sort.

If conditions are favorable, we'll solve both

our environmental and food supply crises in one fell swoop.

Hold up, this is actually some kinda

big-deal-the-future-of- Earth-is-at-stake-mission

you're sending me on.

Indeed, failure is not an option.

You're trusting the fate of the whole world, to me?

Well, um... Agent Six...

I've known you... ever since Kisaragi Corporation

was founded.

I consider you to be...

To be like another one of Kisaragi's Supreme Leaders.

Hmm. A lot of crazy stuff has happened,

but I've enjoyed myself. And the time we've spent

building the corporation together.

I don't know what'll happen on this alien world,

but I'll do the best I can to come back.

You dummy. You realize...

...you're supposed to promise that you'll come back.

What's more, you'll be required to send us

detailed weekly reports.

Let us know that the mission is proceeding,

and that you're doing well.

Astaroth...

Can I give you a big hug before I go?!

Why not go for a kiss, instead?

-- --

I can?! You're into it, right?!

Oh, yeah!

No way! Ugh!

Well, then. In lieu of a sentimental send-off,

how about we just zip you and Alice there straight away?

Fine, I'm going.

It's an honor to be chosen to go to another planet

as the designated representative for the Kisaragi Corporation!

Sure, whatever, because when Astaroth rolled the dice

to decide who--

--Lilith, begin teleportation! -- Eh?

On it! Teleportation...

...Engage!

Yeah, I'm actually a little bit nervous about this.

What's there to be nervous about, lowbie?

Even if things do go wrong out there, don't you have a backup?

We humans can't just reload our brains into a new body

like you creepy little robots, ya know?

Let go of my face.

I'm not all that worried, though.

After all, a mega genius like "Lilith the Dark"

doesn't make junk, right? Eh?

By the way, what is the success rate for the teleporter?

I'm sure you've run a lot of tests.

As of now, the success rate is sitting at 100%,

and that is all you need to know.

Uh. But you've tested it out a buncha times though, right?

Perhaps I should put it this way, Agent Six:

If I ran a lot of experiments and one failed,

well... the success rate would fall below 100.

Uh. Yeah, I think I'm gonna have to

back out now, sorry.

I'm almost positive that you'll come back

--in one piece! --Huh?!

Ready? And...

Wait! You're not a genius, you're just a nutjob!

I can overlook your rudeness. I know you're scared!

Now get going, Agent six!

Aw, damn it, you're gonna kill me!

Mark my words!

If I do make it back, I'll have my revenge!

-- -- Hmm!

Oh, crap! I knew they were gonna kill me!

I'll have to come back as a ghost and haunt 'em,

but I don't wanna die!

We're about 30,000 meters

from the planet's surface.

Earlier, you said you were high-spec, didn't you, Alice?!

That means you can turn into a jet or something, right?!

Tell me you've got a flight mode!

No, but with my self-destruct mode,

I can turn us into a cloud of ashes.

That won't save me!

Villains always have a self-destruct.

Here, take this parachute.

Don't screw up the landing, or I'll explode

and vaporize everything within a wide radius,

which would be a setback.

It's risky just to go on a walk around the block

with you, isn't it?

--Holy crap! -- Hmm?

Check out that city!

Well, I say screw securing a "base."

We'll slap the teleporter together here and head back!

To make it up to me,

those girls are gonna have do some real humiliating stuff!

You can't build it out in the elements like this.

It is an incredibly delicate device.

What?

What's more, it's going to take about a month

for the phase space to fully stabilize.

It wouldn't even work right now.

Ugh... It won't work for a freakin' month?!

Why do they always pull crap like--