A Couple of Cuckoos (カッコウの許嫁)

Whoa!

Congratulations, Mrs. Umino!

It looks like you have a healthy new baby.

I don't think she heard you.

Let's take her to the nursery so she can rest.

Wait, are you sure this is the right bed?

Yeah, it's the empty one over there.

Yep, that's the moment it happened--

the fateful mistake that changed my life forever.

Morning.

Ah.

Huh?

Wait, was it your turn to cook breakfast today?

Oh, I'm definitely taking the one with the biggest yolk.

No way.

That one's mine 'cause the yolk has all the lecithin;

that's what helps boost your memory.

Ugh, with the nerd jargon again?

Just remember, this is why you're gonna die alone!

Not listening!

Hey! Tell me whatcha think!

Lookin' pretty snazzy, huh?

Can you move? Also, lame.

Aw, don't tell me you're

goin' through a phase or somethin'!

Why are you like this?

Nagi! Back me up already!

My family has never been chill.

It's too early for this.

Nagi! Have you seen my earrings anywhere?

They're in the bottom right shelf.

That's where you put them when you were drunk, remember?

Oh! You're pro'bly right. Thank you!

Be sure you don't take too much longer getting ready, okay?

I bet her parents are looking forward to

meeting you after all this time.

You know they're gonna love ya, Nagi!

Yeah, whatever.

They say that like they aren't equally curious

to see what their real kid turned out like.

It's hard to believe,

but it turns out kids really do get mixed up

after they're born sometimes.

Hey, Nagi?

We'll meet up with you at the restaurant.

Sound good?

Try not to be late.

Sure.

Oh! By the way--

Happy birthday, honeybear.

Oh, uh. Thanks.

Hey, are my earrings all right?

They're lookin' snazzy to me!

So, question: does this mean

you're joining their family now?

No way.

I've been living here with you guys for 16 years.

You really think I'm just going to pack up

and move in with some strangers?

I don't care.

So, why'd you ask?

Where are you going?

I think I'm gonna study at the library for a bit.

Studying? What for?

I still need to beat my rival.

Not this again.

It's pretty hard to believe that

you've just been someone else's kid this whole time.

But if you think about it, it makes sense.

You've always been different from us.

Plus, you like studying more than people for some reason.

Hah, hah.

All those jokes about finding me by the river weren't so far off.

I guess you're a prophet.

Hey, Nagi?

-- --

Please stay.

I don't want you to leave.

You're ridiculous, know that?

I promise I'm not going anywhere.

Even if they do ask me,

I'm going to tell them

that I have no intention of being their son.

They said that they would respect

whatever my decision was.

So, I just gotta get this over with

and get back to studying.

Huh?

Hey, are you okay?

Please, just think this through!

No, I'm not gonna--

Don't jump!

Ow.

Seriously, what's wrong with you?!

Get off me already!

Hey, I was about to say-- Boobs!

-- -- Ow!

Wait. You were pretending?

Yeah, duh.

I was gonna make a video and upload it to Inusta.

Like the app?

But then you went and ruined everything.

Is this a drama thing?

That's what I was going for.

Man, this video's useless now.

Ow!

Hm?

Cheap way to get followers.

Hah, no, I've already got plenty.

Huh? Well, good.

Is this girl supposed to be famous or something?

I feel like I've seen her somewhere before.

It's my mom.

Uh?

I wanted to create a big scandal that she couldn't ignore,

so maybe then she'd stop trying to force me to get married!

Sorry, did you just say married?

Yeah, keep up!

It's totally legal once you're 16.

Of course, I know that. That's not what I meant.

I guess I just

didn't think people our age were actually getting married.

You know, it sounds like we're both in weird situations.

Huh?

I see what you mean.

You got mixed up as a baby

and I'm in an arranged engagement.

Sounds like we both have issues with our family then.

Sounds like it.

Wait a second.

I just realized we never actually introduced ourselves.

My name's Erika Amano.

I'm a second-year at Orpheus Girls' Academy.

Ah, OGA.

Isn't that the fancy princess school? Uh?

Hang on.

Did you see Erika's new post? She's so cute!

I just wish I could meet her someday!

Why's this girl the only thing

they talk about during breaks?

There's no way she's this cute. It's probably just a filter.

Hey.

You still with me?

Definitely not a filter!

So, what's your name?

I'm Nagi Umino.

I'm also a second-year and I go to Megurogawa Academy.

Are you serious?

I know that one! That's the super-famous prep school

for genius kids, isn't it?

You're the right age and you're super smart!

Sure.

What is happening?

Perfect! I can use this!

Huh?

Guess what?

As of now, you're officially my boyfriend.

Huh?

Aren't you lucky?

Are you insane? How does that make me lucky?

Why would I go out with a walking red flag like you?

Don't be stupid; it's just pretend.

What?

I mean, who even has them? Arranged marriages, I mean.

Like I would actually marry some random guy

when I don't even know what he looks like or what his name is!

I dunno. Maybe that's a thing rich people normally do?

So that's where my plan comes in!

She ignored me!

"Mother, father,

I need you to know that I have a boyfriend and we're in love!

He's incredibly smart

and he clearly has a bright future ahead of him!

And the best part is he just wants me to be happy!"

"Oh, Erika! We only wish you'd told us about him sooner!"

Thus, the marriage was called off,

and she lived happily ever after,

and no one was the wiser.

Interesting.

You have quite the imagination.

I know.

There's one small problem

and your plan is gonna fall apart because of it.

You've failed to account for the fact

that I don't plan on cooperating.

What?

What do you mean, "what"?

I told you I'm supposed to be meeting my real parents today.

I don't have time to drop everything

and play pretend boyfriend.

I'm being serious!

Can't you see that my future is on the line here?

Yeah, well, mine is, too.

If you don't want to get married, then don't do it.

Do you think I'd be asking you if I...

Ah, jeez, what time is it?

Hm?

Hm.

-- Don't jump! -- Ooh, yeah.

Looks like a full squeeze.