Doctor Who

Life with the Doctor was like this...

Real life was like this...

'It's Lane's Opticians.

'Just reminding you your reading glasses are ready for collection.'

Milk. 'Bye!' Two months out of date.

Yoghurt...agh! Nasty.

We've run out of washing tablets.

We have two lives.

Real life and Doctor life.

Except real life doesn't get much of a look in.

What do we do?

Choose?

'Every time we flew away with the Doctor,

'we'd just become part of his life.

'But he never stood still long enough to become part of ours.

'Except once.'

The year of the slow invasion.

The time the Doctor came to stay.

it's half past six in the morning.

What are you doing lying around?

Haven't you seen them?

What are they?

Nobody knows.

They're everywhere. Where did they come from?

Wait...

Doctor?

Invasion of the very small cubes.

That's new.

World leaders are appealing for calm...

The global appearance of millions of small cubes.

People have been taking the cubes from the streets

into offices and homes...

What are they? Where do they come from?

And why are they here?

Well, they're certainly not random space debris.

They're too perfectly formed for that.

Are they extra-terrestrial in origin?

Well...

You'll have to ask a better man than me.

All absolutely identical.

Not a single molecule's difference between them.

No blemishes, imperfections, individualities...

What if they're bombs? Billions of tiny bombs?

Or transport capsules, maybe with a mini robot inside.

Or deadly hard drives.

Or alien eggs.

Or messages needing decoding.

Or they're all parts of a bigger whole,

jigsaw puzzles that need fitting together.

Very thorough, Brian. Very, very thorough. Well done.

Stay here, watch these, yell if anything happens.

Doctor, is this an alien invasion?

Because that's what it feels like.

There couldn't be life-forms in every cube, could there?

I don't know.

And I really don't like not knowing.

Right, I need to use your kitchen as a lab.

Cook up some cubes.

See what happens.

Right, I'm due at work.

What, you've got a job?

Of course I've got a...

What do you think we do when we're not with you?

I imagined mostly kissing.

I write travel articles for magazines and Rory heals the sick.

My shift starts in an hour. You don't know where my scrubs are? In the lounge. Where you left them.

'Approaching site.'

'Target unconfirmed.

'May be hostile.'

Approaching source now.

Area will be secure in 60 seconds.

Ultimate force available.

All the Ponds, with their house and their jobs and their everyday lives.

The journalist and the nurse.

Long way from Leadworth.

We think it's been 10 years.

Not for you, or Earth. But for us.

Ten years older, ten years of you.

On and off.

Look at you now.

All grown up.

Trap one, kitchen secured.

'Trap three, back garden secured.'

There are soldiers all over my house, and I'm in my pants.

My whole life I've dreamed of saying that,

and I miss it by being someone else.

All these muscles, and they still don't know how to knock.

Sorry about the raucous entrance.

Spike in artron energy reading at this address.

In the light of the last 24 hours, we had to check it out.

And the dogs do love a run out.

Hello.

Kate Stewart, head of scientific research at UNIT.

And with dress sense like that...

I hoped it would be you.

Tell me, since when did science run the military, Kate?

Since me. UNIT's been adapting.

Well, I dragged them along, kicking and screaming,

which made it sound like more fun than it actually was.

What do we know about these cubes?

Far less than we need to.

We've been freighting them in from around the world for testing.

So far, we've subjected them

to temperatures of plus and minus 200 Celsius,

simulated a water depth of five miles,

dropped one out of a helicopter at 10,000 feet,

and rolled our best tank over it. Always intact.

That's impressive. I don't want them to be impressive.

I want them vulnerable with a nice Achilles heel.

We don't know how they got here,

what they're made of or why they're here.

And all around the world, people are picking them up,

and taking them home.

Like iPads have dropped out of the sky.

Taking them to work, taking pictures, making films,

posting them on Flickr and YouTube.

Within three hours, the cubes had a thousand separate Twitter accounts.

Twitter!

I've recommended we treat this as a hostile incursion,

gather them all up and lock them in a secure facility.

But that would take massive international agreement

and co-operation.

We need evidence.

The cubes arrived in plain sight, in vast quantities, as the sun rose.

So what does that tell us?

Maybe they wanted to be seen. Noticed.

Or more than that, they want to be observed.

So we observe them. Stay with them. Round the clock.

Watch the cubes, day and night.

Record absolutely everything about them.

Team cube, in it together.

Four days.

Nothing!

Nothing!

Not a single change in any cube, anywhere in the world.

Four days, and I am still in your lounge! You were the one who wanted to observe them.

Yes, I thought they'd do something, didn't I? Not just sit there while everyone eats endless cereal!

You said we had to be patient.

Yes, you, you! Not me! I hate being patient!

Patience is for wimps!

I can't live like this.

Don't make me. I need to be busy.

Fine! Be busy! We'll watch the cubes.

98, 99, 100. Amy!

Four million, 900, 99, five million...

That's better.

Nothing like a bit of activity to pass the time.

How long was I gone?

Er...about an hour.

Can't do it.

No...

Where are you going?

Brian! You're still here.

You told me to watch the cubes.

Four days ago. Ah! Doesn't time fly when you're alone with your thoughts?

You can't just leave, Doctor. Yes, of course I can.

Quick jaunt, restore sanity...

Oooh, hey, come if you like.

They can't just go off like that.

Can't they? Can't you?

That's how it goes, isn't it? I've got my job. Oh yes, Rory.

The universe is awaiting, but you have a little job to... It's not little.

It's important to me.

Look...

what you do isn't all there is.

Never said it was.

All right.

Fine.

I'll be back soon.

Monitor the cubes.

Call me.

I'll have the Tardis set to every Earth newsfeed.

At the end of a week of cubic questions and theories,

but no answers,

could this be the greatest stealth marketing campaign

in business history,

and if it is, will those behind it

ever come forward and explain exactly what it's for?

I'm so pleased for you two.

It's about time you made an honest woman of her.

Amy...about bridesmaids...

Mmm. You've missed quite a few things the last year or two.

I'm so totally there. Whatever you need.

You're a life saver, mate, literally.

Ah, well, thanks.

But there are months when we don't see you.

And we can't do without you. I want you to go full time.

Full time?

Blimey. Er...

I said yes.

I committed.

And I committed to being a bridesmaid, months in advance.

Like I know I'm going to be here.

So the Doctor's God knows where,

the cubes aren't doing anything at all...

Did real life just get started?

I like it.

So do I.

Brian's log, day 67.

You, er...you can't call it that. Brian's log?